Would You Leave Your 15-Year-Old Home Alone All Weekend?

One thing I think every parent struggles with when it comes to their first (and/or only) kid is when it’s officially OK to leave them home alone. It’s maybe especially hard for us millennials who were often latchkey kids, letting ourselves into our homes from the bus and making sure the chicken was out of the freezer to thaw every afternoon in the fourth grade. But seriously, is there a right or wrong answer? Isn’t the first time you leave your kid home alone always fraught with anxiety?

One parent took to the Reddit /parenting community to ask specifically about their 15-year-old — and if they could be left home alone for an entire weekend. The original poster (OP) wrote that they’ve left their 15-year-old home alone for several hours before, and there’s never been an issue. But now, OP and their wife are planning an anniversary trip over the summer that would have their 15-year-old home alone from Friday night to Sunday afternoon. Also, the place they’re going is about three to four hours away.

“We have an only child, just turned 15 years old, finishing freshman year in high school,” OP wrote. “Two options: 1. Leave her with her best friend and her parents, who we've known since kindergarten. 2. Leave her home alone with the two dogs while we're away.”

OP noted that their child is “super responsible,” and they live in a boring area that has never given them any reason to feel unsafe. “She's CPR certified and says she can manage to be by herself while we're gone. We've done late nights (five to six hours) with her home alone before, and she ends up watching TV or reading a book the entire night.”

But does that mean she’s ready for a weekend on her own?

My immediate gut reaction was to just send her to her best friend’s house. Just because a kiddo is capable and responsible doesn’t mean they want to be capable or responsible. What if they get scared? What if they’re anxious at night? What if waking up in the morning in a house all by themselves feels uncomfortable? This feels a little different to me than being home alone for one evening or even a weekend alone with siblings.

As always with parenting decisions, there’s no perfect decision. And the Reddit commenters really gave OP some things to think about — mainly, what does your kid think?

“I mean, she's old enough where you can ask her and talk through it,” one wrote.

“Has she said she’s OK being alone? She’s certainly old enough. Is there an adult nearby she can call if she needs something?” another asked.

“For me it would be about your daughter’s comfort level being home alone. At her age, I would’ve been perfectly fine, but each kid is going to be different,” another pointed out.

Many of the other comments were split between Reddit users who shared that they stayed home alone at that age and were perfectly fine, and others who said that being home alone for an entire weekend at 15 — no matter how much they thought they could handle it — would freak them out.

“My teen is responsible enough to do something like this, but at least for her, I know from past experience she starts to get lonely if she's left home alone too long. It reminds me of when she gets homesick, but it's the opposite ‘cause she's at home, yet no one else is,” one commenter wrote.

“My parents started leaving me alone for weekends around this age, and I was mature and responsible and could handle it, but I wasn't prepared for how freaked out I was trying to sleep in the dark, empty house (we also had two dogs, which helped, but I still barely slept),” another added.

And one comment just went straight for the truth: “How can anyone on Reddit answer this without knowing anything about you or your kid?”

I mean. Fair.

The thing is, every kid is supremely different — the comment section on this post proves it. Tons of parents shared how much their kids love being home alone for a weekend, while others said their kid would never be OK with it. Even if OP’s teenager says, “Yes, I want to stay home alone!” it’s worth tapping in her best friend’s parents as back-up if she realizes at midnight on Friday that she’d very much like to be sleeping in a home with other human beings for the weekend.

It’s also worth noting, as one commenter pointed out, that different states have different laws regarding leaving kids home alone. God forbid something happens, you don’t want to be on the hook for child neglect because your 15-year-old was home alone for a weekend.

I think, in this situation, it’s not as easy as deciding if a 15-year-old is ready to stay home alone all weekend... it’s deciding if your kid is ready to be home alone all weekend.