Week 35: You’re Probably Thinking About Delivery Every Three Seconds

by Alison Bucalo
Originally Published: 

It’s pregnancy week 35, and here’s what’s going on…


The eighth month is coming to a close this week, and you’re probably thinking about delivery approximately once every three seconds. See if you can schedule a tour of your hospital or birthing center soon, taking note of where you’ll be allowed to park overnight and which door you should use if you go into labor in the middle of the night. Get the forms to pre-register and turn them in ASAP; otherwise, you’ll be signing forms between contractions, and ain’t nobody got time for that!


Your boobs are practically resting on top of your uterus now, which has relocated to right around the spot where your esophagus used to be. All your other organs are pressed against your interior walls like onlookers at a crowded nightclub — where your baby is the star and hogging the entire dance floor. As you’ve no doubt noticed, even if you don’t plan to breastfeed, your boobs missed the memo; they’re swelling to comic book proportions as they prepare to nourish your baby. (And spray all over the shower walls as soon as warm water touches them — just wait until the first time that happens!)


Speaking of melons, you baby’s now about the size of one, albeit a melon that’s lubricating itself with whitish, waxy cheese-like vernix caseosa to help it slip through your birth canal. (Sorry about that last sentence, we know your appetite is touch-and-go as it is.)


You’ve packed your hospital bag (including a maternity outfit to wear home because — spoiler alert — you’re still going to look six months pregnant for a while) and stocked up on everything you’ll need at home. You’ve read all the books, or — if this isn’t your first pregnancy — all those books are currently in a box in your basement and you’re too damn tired and busy to look for them.

Do take some time to relax, but if the urge to nest is too strong for you to sit still, at least turn that energy into something that makes you feel more prepared. If you like cooking, whip up a few extra meals to stick in the freezer so you’ll have easy dinners on hand after the baby comes. If you enjoy getting some fresh air, take a walk with your partner so you can argue about the baby’s name in a new, exciting location. You get the idea!

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