23 Rules of Eating, According to a Toddler

toddler-baby-eating

1. Refuse anything but Cheerios for breakfast. Have them without milk on Mondays, Thursdays and every other Friday.

2. Hyperventilate if they get this wrong.

3. Don’t try anything new, EVER.

4. Just because you liked something yesterday does not mean you have to like it again today. It is perfectly acceptable to change your mind and you do not have to explain yourself.

5. Be suspicious of anything that was recently alive. Orange, dead-looking stuff is safer.

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6. Request a wide variety of food at the supermarket and then A. Deny all knowledge of it upon your return home or B. Allow it to be cooked first and then say you don’t like it.

7. Spend some time revising brand names so that you can legitimately refuse cheaper derivatives.

8. Any amount of cooking or food preparation time above 30 seconds is wholly unacceptable.

9. Ask for updates of when things will be ready every 10 seconds. Protest with your fists on the floor if things are taking too long.

10. This may result in the meal being served half frozen but it doesn’t matter as you are not going to eat it anyway.

11. No eating on Wednesday afternoons, just because.

12. Make sure you have a spoon, knife and two forks with all meals and then eat with your hands.

13. Only ever use one specific plate. Flip out if it is dirty.

14. Deposit as much of your meal off the side of the table as possible. They say they “spend their whole life cleaning the kitchen floor.” Help make it a reality.

15. Sweet potato chips are insulting.

16. Avoid anything with sauce as there is a risk it contains blended vegetables.

17. Never drink water. They say “You will drink it when you’re thirsty.” Don’t. Get admitted to hospital with dehydration. That’ll teach ’em.

18. Always say you are hungry when you are in the bath.

19. Train your body clock to wake up for midnight bananas.

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20. Casseroles, stews and pies are not to be trusted.

21. Sweet potato chips are insulting.

22. Kick people who describe broccoli as “little trees” in the shins. It’s condescending and its disgusting.

23. Avocado – WTF? – NO.

Related post: Bedtime Stalling 101

About the writer

Katie blogs over at Hurrah For Gin, a very real account of parenting sans the sugar coating. She lives in Brighton in the UK with her husband and two young boys and is an avid lover of rabbits, cheese and brushing her teeth…Oh and Gin! Find her on Twitter and Facebook.

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Carolyn Redding 6 months ago

love it!!!

Lynn Jones 6 months ago

Actually that’s 22 rules. The one about sweet poato chips appears twice.

Shannon Lee 6 months ago

I did, lol.

Carrie Vella 6 months ago

My kids have to eat what is made for them or they don’t eat! They are four and six and if I let them run the show now we are screwed when they are teenagers. Parents should ALWAYS be the boss..

Ruth Simpson 6 months ago

Mine love them. 4yo and 2yo twins. Now pasta is a battle im not winning. They refuse unless granma makes mac & cheese.

Pretty Good Wif 6 months ago

Um.. Some of these totally apply to me. Eat as I say not as I do, kid.

Melissa Lampard 6 months ago

I used to feel so proud and lucky because my baby ate EVERYTHING with zero issues and only drank water. She is now 19 months and still only drinks water because that’s her only option, but as far as food goes… It’s hard to remember that she once ate everything!! They go through phases, and I now kick myself for ever saying I was lucky hahaha! Toddlers are their own breed of crazy!

Jody Alton 6 months ago

That picture’s photoshopped. No two year old in the history of ever has opened their mouth willingly when there are Brussels sprouts in the room.

Carolyn Francis Quivers 6 months ago

Nothing I have said warrants calling names. I have not resorted to doing so. I have expressed my thoughts in a respectful manner. Thanks for turning a thoughtful conversation into something ugly.

Jessica Holden Lauderdale 6 months ago

It’s a silly satirical article.
Calm down, sanctomommy!

Melissa Harris 6 months ago

Fickle little punks….lol.

Diane Schneider 6 months ago

last night Gunnar found a small piece of potato chip in the ottoman, he started to put it in his mouth then decided to feed it to me…

Karen Buck 6 months ago

My first baby went months eating only strained liver and beets! I gagged so much feeding her I had to get my husband to do the honors! Her breath even smelled of it. Now I think her body knew she needed extra iron.

Robyn Bourgoin 6 months ago

I like those too!

Michelle Molesky Laskey 6 months ago

NUMBER 4!!! ABSOLUTELY. Love something today… pretend to gag looking at it tomorrow =-O

Carolyn Francis Quivers 6 months ago

Autism and sensory issues are a different story completely. However, it is important to work closely with a therapist or other resource to determine effective discipline and parenting techniques for your child. You cannot allow special needs to make you a “hand’s off” parent (not that you are doing so).

Rachel 6 months ago

Awesome. This is my life.

Katie Thomas 6 months ago

My kids are grown at this point.
I’m just here for the “in MY home” comments.

Katie Thomas 6 months ago

Lolololololololololololol

Britni Killeen 6 months ago

My son has sensory problems, and he will literally starve himself. He went three weeks without eating a full meal. He pretty much lived on snacks. I set healthy, diverse food out at every meal and he completely ignores it at times. Not every child is the same

Tonya Merrell 6 months ago

My toddler, yes, but my 6 yr old is worse about some things, lol

Emma Jenkins 6 months ago

Im not one for letting her eat something other then the meal we made for dinner. If she doesnt like it then she wont eat it and be hungry.

Melissa Eaton 6 months ago

My son ate everything at 1 but he suddenly hated everything at 2. You may be lucky, you may just need to give it time.

Nichole Webster 6 months ago

Yeah my kid would rather starve. And I don’t give options, they eat what’s in front of them or go hungry, well, my toddler would rather go hungry.

Carolyn Francis Quivers 6 months ago

I never said to force feed them. This “theory” worked in my home.

Jackie Burrington 6 months ago

It’s all good in theory but once again you can’t force feed them

Helen Tesla 6 months ago

It’s fine, wasn’t going to drink them anyway

Helen Tesla 6 months ago

Request milk AND juice and then try and drink them both at once. Get upset when this fails.

Carolyn Francis Quivers 6 months ago

You can put it in front of them and not give other choices. A child will eventually eat when they get hungry enough. I understand that there are foods they will not like, we all have things that don’t taste good to us. But, if they ate it one day and refuse it the next, you are in a battle of wills. If you lose that battle, the next one will be even harder to win. The toddler years are when kids are learning how their world works, you are responsible for teaching this. If you teach them that they can control their environment by acting like little tyrants, then that is how they will continue to act. Kids need parents to be the ones in control. It makes their world make sense.

Amy Hughes Daniels 6 months ago

I don’t disagree with the point of what you are saying but you can’t force the food down your child’s throat.

Brianna Asten Mahaffey 6 months ago

I definitely have a picky 5 y/o. But nothing like this, and I am THANKFUL!

Katherine Zelko 6 months ago

Toddlers only? This applies to school age kids also! My kids actually ate better as toddlers than they do now (K and 1st)!

Emma Jenkins 6 months ago

Am i lucky my 1 year old will eat anything?! And dont drink water? Thats her only option for a drink!

Carolyn Francis Quivers 6 months ago

So, here is the deal: if you allow your toddler to win every battle, including those about food, then your toddler will run your home. Pick your battles, but you better make sure you win the majority of them. Toddlers become teenagers eventually.

Pam Zipperer 6 months ago

Hmm…my almost 9 year old has recently decided he doesn’t like peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, lasagna, spaghetti, or pepperoni on pizza. He liked all of these until a couple of months ago. What’s up with that?

Tiffany Ferrier 6 months ago

If it weren’t for frozen blueberries my child wouldn’t ever eat.. And if they aren’t frozen she doesn’t like them LOL

Shannon Rae-Dufour 6 months ago

Yep and only eat three different foods oatmeal yogurt and juice and on thursdays only juice

Taara Datta Donley 6 months ago

#14. The floor is my three-year old’s plate. Instead of a Persian rug, we have a crumb carpet covering our kitchen floor. My son likes to run through it in bare feet and scatter it through the house like dandelion seeds. It’s part of our morning routine.

Theresa Goheens 6 months ago

As two year old Aj says “I doun’t wike it”

Katie Smith 8 months ago

The kick ’em in the songs for calling broccoli little trees made me laugh out loud! That is hilarious!

My two year old is a very picky eater. It sucks!

zodi 8 months ago

Im a lucky mom. My son ate just about everything we put in front of him.

Kit Digby 9 months ago

Sweet potato chips are the only acceptable meal at my house.

Anne Hipwell 9 months ago

All true, mums have so much patience, or do they???

Amie Stutzman McNaylor 9 months ago

It’s like they know him.

Clare Linehan 9 months ago

No eating on Wednesday afternoons ever

Jessica Wheeler Brown 9 months ago

My little one ate SO well as a toddler BUT now she it’s 6 and wants to act like this! !! yea, nope. Eat what I cook for this meal or the next, but no new meals till this one is consumed.

Shahgufta Ali Khan 9 months ago
Diana Gonzalez 9 months ago

# 22 I have to pee the minute they sit down at the table

Carolyn Werner Haney 9 months ago

Hilarious.

sara 9 months ago

Reading this I feel so blessed with my little ones eating habits. They will eat anything. Haven’t come across anything they refuse to eat. Can totally relate to it not getting done fast enough for them though…

Halina Ritchie 9 months ago

Sounds like there is no hope for these kids to eat nutritionally. You had the chance when they were young enough but you just let it slip

Kate 9 months ago

More like, always say “I have to go potty NOW!” when you’re in the bath…… Sigh….

Stacy Carrasco-Serrano 9 months ago

Yup this is my kid.

Lana Dorroh 9 months ago

This is hilarious!

Pamela Martinez 9 months ago

Soo Goddamn true!! Specially cleaning the floors all day long… she make it real!

Caleb Verzyden 9 months ago

Brilliant babies.

Dona Reggio 9 months ago

Ta’Maira Michalides made me think of Declyn. especially the bananas part

Terese Mims 9 months ago

Cheese, only eat cheese. EVER

Jessica Lee 9 months ago

Number 4 is defiantly jax to a t!!! @meeg

Keirstin Cobain 9 months ago

So THIS is what’s been going on this whole time!? Courtney…beware.

Jennifer Campbell Burgess 9 months ago

Numbers 4, 8 and 9! Just went through this tonight…

Katie De Oliveira Anderson 9 months ago

My son so far eats everything, he doesn’t have a choice, I’m from Brazil and we don’t have pick eaters. I’m a little rough about his meals, if he doesn’t want to eat he will have for the next meal, and it works! His grandma says he doesn’t like this or that but when he is hungry he eats anything! He sucks about sleeping but eating he rocks!

Marian Hargrove 9 months ago

If your meat is not called a chicken nugget, don’t eat it.

Hope Breslauer Campbell 9 months ago

Same rules for 7-year-olds and 13-year-olds.

Teresa Marie Davis 9 months ago

I’ll second this. To me this looks like a list should be titled something to the effect of how to know your raising a spoiled rotten toddler. Maybe I’m just lucky and don’t have a picky eater, but he eats what we eat or he doesn’t eat, period.

Melissa Vanderzee Fillpot 9 months ago

Midnight bananas! LOL!

Leah Bradbury 9 months ago

Ha! This made me laugh. My almost 3 year old loves broccoli and avocados! They are so funny with what they will and will not eat. A different experience with the second child. You realize they will eat when they are hungry and unless they have a food allergy or medical condition, they are fine and will not starve.

shawnda 9 months ago

Or stick it Mom’s food, hair or even better,mouth!

Talerra Lee Hontou 9 months ago

This is awsome

Candy Hill Johansen 9 months ago

Demand a peanut butter and jally sangwidge for Thanksgiving dinner, then eat only the peanut butter and jelly off of the bread, leaving a teeny hole in the middle of each piece. Then scream if you can’t have a second piece of pumpkin pie.

Tisha N Jason 9 months ago

Bahahaha!!!!!!!!!

Mahvish Akhtar 9 months ago

Haha, yes Hina! That’s both of them. Moving has been a blast with every single one of these situations going on in the back ground.

Macarena Romano Valerón 9 months ago

Ja,ja! So true!

Rosalie Castro 9 months ago

This perfectly describes my daughter.

Hina Badat Baig 9 months ago

ugh, my almost 10 yr old still conveniently needs to poop at dinner some days. it’s still a fight getting her to eat!

Meg Davis 9 months ago

Only eat around the outside of the five chicken fingers you’ve been given for dinner and then insist you are starving and demand more chicken. When it is pointed out to you that there is still chicken on your plate, cry hysterically.

Nicole Alexis Blackman 9 months ago

Rule 24: Always determine the best time to go poo poo is right after mommy serves you a nice warm meal she has cooked you for dinner EVERY SINGLE NIGHT. Take as long as possible to go poo poo. Then don’t eat your food. Perfect.

Steven Buecher 9 months ago

Two rules that helped us raise a 6 and 3 year old that aren’t picky eaters:

1. You have to try everything before saying you dont like it.

2. Eat what’s served or you don’t eat. Even if you try it and dont like it.

(P.S. kids won’t let themselves starve…)

Emily Gerwig 9 months ago

Hahaha. So great and TRUE!

Tina Dick 9 months ago

Hahhahaha YES!

Jessica Hall 9 months ago

I can honestly say that I am blessed to have a 4 year old who will eat what you give him.

Nicole Alexis 9 months ago

lmao! so hilarious!

Becca 1 year ago

When my now ten year old was a toddler he would refuse to eat foods that were certain colors (ie. I don’t like that. It’s orange and I don’t like orange.) The color of the day was, of course, variable.

Ricky 1 year ago

I have a two year old who has had feeding issues since the day he was born. It would make my day if he would just stop being picky or sensitive to textures, or whatever else it is that is preventing him from eating because my wife and I have been through a lot with him. I know toddlers are tough, but my son is giving us a run for our money.

Esteban 1 year ago

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Salumu 1 year ago

Wowza, problem solved like it never hadenepp.

Angel 1 year ago

Haaaahhh. I’m not too bright today. Great post!

http://www.surrenderat20.net/ 1 year ago

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Kerri Lydon O’Leary 1 year ago

Love this.

Liana 1 year ago

Read this book and you never have to worry about this nonsense.

“French Kids Eat Everything: How Our Family Moved to France, Cured Picky Eating, Banned Snacking, and Discovered 10 Simple Rules for Raising Happy, Healthy Eaters” by Karen Le Billon
http://www.amazon.com/French-Kids-Eat-Everything-Discovered/dp/0062103296

while you’re at it, read this book as well.

“Bringing Up Bébé: One American Mother Discovers the Wisdom of French Parenting” by Pamela Druckerman
http://www.amazon.com/Bringing-Up-B%C3%A9b%C3%A9-Discovers-Parenting/dp/1594203334/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1405719103&sr=1-1&keywords=raising+bebe

greg znajda 1 year ago

Wow! I must be lucky I have had none of these problems. My 6yr olds favorite food is Brussels sprouts.
all we did as seta schedule for eating,allow her to have choices and enforce the try everything rule. Really have had no problem at all.

Karen Beale 1 year ago

So true but my youngest is now 8 and still behaves like this.

carrie 1 year ago

It doesn’t have to be that bad, lol. Keep sweet away from your toddler during year 1 & most of 2, introduce them primarily to veggies and fruits, and you will be on your way. Start with whole grains too, not white bread. Basically everything you feed from the first tray of finger food til when they turn 2 you have to consider is setting the precedent for the rest of their childhood. My 3 year old eats broccoli, peas, greenbeans, carrots, beets, zucchini, spinach, seaweed, and more plus whole grain breads and bagels, and drinks water and watered down juices. She does not like it when mommy puts green things in her macaroni and cheese tho!

Jenny 1 year ago

My 3 year old daughter said, “I’m not eating trees” first time I tried feeding her broccoli. Once she tried it though, she loved it!

Esther Conway 1 year ago

Haha! Had about half of them with Lauren this evening!

Zara Murphy 1 year ago

This was written about my Mr 4!!! Spot on!

Jelly Juice 1 year ago

lol my kids liked and like trees! only steamed tho

Karen Buck 1 year ago

Sooo right! I refuse–yep refuse to cut the crust off the sandwiches–since I’ve watched them all eat the crust I was cutting off and leave the sandwich!

Catherine Townsend-Scott 1 year ago
Rita W. Neher 1 year ago

As if they had the cognitive powers to plan this out!!

Ginger Gendreau 1 year ago

Honestly I’ve become a staunch “eat what I put in front of you or starve” parent. After my oldest refused to eat anything but buttered noodles for a month, I cried to my pediatrician who calmly told me “She will not starve herself. When she gets hungry enough, she will eat. Just keep giving it to her until she eats it. Don’t back down.” Four more kids later, it’s still the best advice I ever got.

Sophie Thompson 1 year ago

My son is 10. He survives on pasta, ketchup and cheese. Wholemeal bread for sandwiches and if given white will refuse it. Really? Freak! He wouldn’t eat a sausage or pizza until he was 7! He likes slices on lemon in water, houmous, and a few other things but will only eat chicken if it’s wrapped in batter or breadcrumbs! Aaasrrrrgggghhhhh!!!!!

Sophie Thompson 1 year ago

My son is 10. He still does that Barbara. Arghh!!!!!

Heather Childress 1 year ago

Not just toddlers, my preschooler does this to the letter, UGH

Cassandra DeBaets 1 year ago

Don’t forget the hidden rule of holding food in the cheeks to avoid swallowing at all costs. Systematically dribble sodden food down chin so mom has to catch it with a napkin. Do this for every bite to avoid eating anything but bread.

Danielle Kinahan Christie 1 year ago

This is soooo my almost 3.5 year old now!!! Lord give me the strength…

LJ Scaccia 1 year ago

While I see the hilarity in this it does seem that this would be an extremely frustrating way to live. Hopefully short lived only for the toddler years. I think I would lose my sanity if this is how all toddlers behaved. Thanks for the funny read.

Payge Holly 1 year ago

Midnight bananas hahahaha

Laura Brown 1 year ago

6 (especially when they sample them in store and like them…until you make them at home)
and 15 (which is also 21)

Mandy Munro Coonce 1 year ago

#11 was spot on! This was great!

Cassie Vorgang 1 year ago

This describes my son to the T! Hilarious!!

Michael P Jarvis 1 year ago

I found it funny but I’m sure it’s anything but to be on the receiving end of that sort of tyrany.

Cherri Brakhage 1 year ago

Yuliya and these comments! I’m cracking up!

Kelly Baranak Benefield 1 year ago

My kid to a T. Right now, it’s “cereal with the marshmallows” (lucky charms) in a baggie, milk on the side – that’s breakfast. Lunch is usually whatever doesn’t gross him out that day and dinner is “long soup” which is chicken noodle soup. Has to be condensed. He’s 5 and a picky little turd.

Becky Whitton 1 year ago

Thank gawd my son eats everything. I hope it stays that way as he gets older, he’s only 15 months

Liz 1 year ago

LOL! All these, and also: remove it from my eye line. But you’re not allowed to eat it either.

Jamie Garrison 1 year ago

Can I add just because I ate it and loved it at grandma’s house does not automatically mean I will eat it and love it for you…..

Valerie Ann 1 year ago

Adorable – I have a 13 month old and will soon be following these rules I think.

Alexandra Bunny Martens 1 year ago

I tricked my son into eating sliced pears tonight by telling him they were apples AND giving him maple syrup to dip them in.

Lawry 1 year ago

My kid is 6 and unfortunately most of these still apply!!! Except Veggies must be raw and served with Ranch!

Carly Bonderud 1 year ago

Lol. Some of this describes ME. At least that’s what my husband would say since I only eat what I want to. Hey, I spent 12 years being forced to eat whatever my parents wanted me to. They told me that when I was the grown up I could choose whether or not to eat something I don’t like. Well I’m grown up now and if I don’t want it then I won’t eat it. Not the greatest message for my kid, but I really can’t force myself to choke on food I can’t stand just to set a good example. 😉

Shannon King Gomez 1 year ago

This is legit. All of it! My 3 year old is IMPOSSIBLE and follows all do these rules, religiously. Ha!

Weberly 1 year ago

But…but…broccoli IS fairy trees! Lol

Michelle Nades 1 year ago

I literally hold my breath when I put food down on the table for my 2.5 year old. It’s either going straight to the floor or it will be eaten in 5 seconds. Glad I’m not alone

Danielle Whitehouse Gray 1 year ago

can this list go for some dads to? lol

Dee Dee Hensley Kasitz 1 year ago

We just had Brussels sprouts tonight. The toddler screamed for them to get off of her plate.

Christine Bouffard 1 year ago

Cheese. It’s nothing but Mac & Cheese. Or, string cheese.

Angelika Belcher Gurley 1 year ago

This sums up my 15 & 13 year olds!

Alienne Engel 1 year ago

my son’s a pretty good eater. but he has his days where he won’t even eat food that was his favorite the previous day lol

Nina Cheung 1 year ago

Sad but true story of my life.

Joni Cohen 1 year ago

I’m lucky my grand daughter eats everything

Sarah-Marie Martin 1 year ago

Hilarious!

Jan Bishop 1 year ago

So true

Dana Dane 1 year ago

Ha avacado!!!

Jessica Ann McCloud 1 year ago

We are going through the, “Why would I like watermelon? It’s just summer. It’s a sweet juicy fruit that I loved and asked for all the time. Get that watermelon out of my face!” phase. Yay.

Michelle Brennan 1 year ago

This is definitely my 5yr old boy lol

Brandy Lopez Barbee 1 year ago

Kids 8 and 10…. Many STILL apply! Lol

Hurrah For Gin 1 year ago

Thank you SO much for sharing this for me. Delighted to see so many people enjoying it and am very glad to know i am not alone in my non eating toddler woes 😉

Anna Swart 1 year ago

I swear my son could survive on air and cheetos if I let him.

Elizabeth A Deeley-Gallup 1 year ago

Totally relive this every day. And I have teenagers!

Emily Clark 1 year ago

My son will gladly eat any and all vega tables for his grandparents but hates everything but Mac n cheese and pb&j at home

Amanda Bruner 1 year ago

My 9 year old…

Hurrah For Gin 1 year ago

Um yep – is that ok? 😉

mandy 1 year ago

number four for sure! my two yr old wanted a hotdog. i made it, cut it up and he dumped it onto the floor saying he didn’t want it then demanded cheese -_-

aj 1 year ago

8, 12 and 20! lets not forget that what mommy has on her plate is better. even though the same thing is on their plate.

Helen Russo 1 year ago

lol. I freely admit how lucky I am when it comes to my daughter and food. She’s met very few foods she doesn’t like or shovel into her mouth so fast and furiously you’d think I never fed her!

Connie Eberly-Bartoo 1 year ago

Have you been secretly videotaping my home?

Nikki Rickeard 1 year ago

Hahahaha

Jennifer Ford 1 year ago

Plain (no milk allowed) Cheerios and Shreddies for Dinner for a whole week!

Lauren Rohr 1 year ago

I’m so glad my kid isn’t like this. He’ll eat literally anything, he put away a whole plate of marinated jelly fish, and broiled octopus when we went for dim-sum last weekend.

Robin 1 year ago

Refuse to eat anything green. If there is anything green on the plate it must be picked out of the rest of the food and dropped on the floor.

Raphaëlle Thiriet Zilio 1 year ago

I would tend to agree, but then they get them at school or wherever and fall in love with them. Thankfully I found a couple of cheerios look alines that work 😉

Birdie Bird 1 year ago

So true!!!

Amanda Tarbitt 1 year ago

Smile and reach for a piece of food – then when you have it, maintain smile and eye contact and slowly but deliberately toss it on the floor. Repeat.

Briana N Edelman 1 year ago

Number four is the one that completely throws me off. He acts like it’s the most amazing thing that has ever crossed his lips and then the next day he looks at it with disgust.

Cookie Ramone 1 year ago

There is an inverse equation only toddlers know, relating to time taken to make x effort is inversely proportionate to the probability of them eating it over crying volume

Katie De Oliveira Anderson 1 year ago

i know thats why I’m enjoying now 😉 I’m reading a book about french parenting which i’m loving it specially the feeding part, I’m brazilian and we do the same things with our kids, dont know if he will like everything but definitaly will enjoy fresh food 😉

Leah Gillen 1 year ago

That described my first son to the tee and I just cried from laughing!

Ashley Houston 1 year ago

#4 #6 #11… Pretty much all of them fit my children to a T

Elaine Dean 1 year ago

Toddlers schmoddlers I have teenagers that follow many of these rules. STARVE YOU UNGRATEFUL BLANKITY BLANKS!

Mary Sunshine 1 year ago

Haha that’s my 3 yo

Katie De Oliveira Anderson 1 year ago

thank God so far my 18 months old eats anything I serve him, I think he just doesnt have a choice lol

Carrie Anderson Pfeiffer 1 year ago

True!

Alicia Green Dettmann 1 year ago

Does this apply to 7yr olds too? 24 out of 20 ALL belong to him

Amy Snipes Jennings 1 year ago

All of these are my four year old. So far my 1 1/2 year old is a human vacuum cleaner. I’m sure it won’t last, though.

Barbara Hiemstra Ticich 1 year ago

Most of this still applies to my 5 year old! She’s famous for “I used to like it when I was a baby but I don’t now”… Ok, you ate it YESTERDAY!!! Sigh.

Madelyn Stearns 1 year ago

They forgot “Ask for applesauce, yogurt, or fruit ALL THE TIME. Never eat it once it is given to you. Just lick it, thus ruining the chance of it getting put back away and refuse to eat it. Wait 5 minutes. Claim to be hungry AGAIN!”

Amber Cook 1 year ago

#19 is my son. We joke that he’s too cool to eat bananas at “normal” times

Bree Leon 1 year ago

So funny, so true and so sad considering this reminded me we are about to do this all over again, lol.

Karen Austin 1 year ago

My son is only 7 months but I am not looking forward to this! 1&2 will not be happening though: Cheerios=nestle=evil!

Amy Moorman 1 year ago

#8 is my life

Amy Rossman Deich 1 year ago

My 4 year old has suddenly decided she doesn’t like pizza… really, kid? It’s one of 4 things you do eat, so how can we eliminate it??!!!!

Stacey Theiss Zornes 1 year ago

LOL.

Emily Zeb 1 year ago

or decide half way through chewing a bite that you no longer want. proceed to spit it all over yourself, mom loves that!

Kathryn Smith Boruff 1 year ago

Story of my life!

Magen Kauffman 1 year ago

OMG! #17!!!!! My now 9 year old did that to me twice! Once when we tried getting him off the bottle when he was 2 and once more when he’d had his tonsils removed at 3! He wouldn’t drink ANYTHING; milk, juice, or water! With the bottle incident, they just pumped him up with fluids and told us to just give him the damn bottle back and talk to his peds. With the tonsils, he was in the hospital for 2 days b/c they wouldn’t release him until he started drinking again. I NEVER want to go through that again!

Maiko Iida 1 year ago

Spend hours making things from scratch… like oven roasted whole chicken. To be demanded a ham sammich instead…. The joys.

Allison Diehl 1 year ago

#12

Savannah de los Santos 1 year ago

Lmao

Peggy Hernandez 1 year ago

Yes! My 3 year old suddenly decided she won’t eat ravioli, which had been on the short list of things she would eat…

Adriana Pack Sorensen 1 year ago

Our microwave is a mean monster that eats my kids food!

Jennifer Anne Weedon 1 year ago

Oh my goodness thos is so true! X

Bev Heineck Dunigan 1 year ago

I agree! It’s funny now. Then … not so much. :)