Ryan Reynolds Proves Parenthood Is Sexy… If You’re A Man

by Ashley Austrew

People magazine just named Ryan Reynolds their official Sexiest Dad Alive.

Ryan Reynolds is a good looking man, according to the media and anyone with functioning eyeballs. He’s so good looking, in fact, that People magazine has decided to dub him the “Sexiest Dad Alive” because men get to live in a magical universe where having a baby somehow makes you even hotter.

The 39-year-old father of one takes the prize from Justin Timberlake, who was last year’s “Sexiest Dad.” Reynolds’ new title was announced last night during an episode of the Tonight Show, where Jimmy Fallon unveiled the upcoming magazine cover, complete with a smoldering portrait and a caption that reads, “Having a daughter was a dream come true.”

In the magazine, Reynolds reveals he’s secretly always wanted a daughter and says, “I don’t have to prepare to be wrapped around my daughter’s finger. I have been wrapped around her little finger since the day she plopped out into this world.” It’s one in a long series of nice things Reynolds has said about marriage and fatherhood since he began doing press for his new movie, Deadpool, and the internet can’t stop falling all over itself every time he opens his mouth to speak.

In fact, fatherhood has somehow elevated Reynolds from normal Hollywood hot guy to “Sweet Lord, my ovaries are melting from the hotness” status, and one can’t help thinking the hero-level worship wouldn’t be quite the same if Reynolds were a woman. I mean, can you imagine a world where everyone would collectively lose their shit clamoring to name someone the sexiest mom?

For women, a title like that is almost an impossibility. It’s not that there’s a shortage of beautiful mothers. Rather, it’s that the media would never collectively fawn over a 39-year-old woman, oohing and ahhing whenever she mentions her marriage or admits that yes, she actually enjoys being a mom. Imagine a woman being applauded for saying she’s wrapped around her child’s finger, or a comment section full of people saying a mom’s gray hair makes her look sexier and more refined.

It would never happen — ever. Moms don’t get to be cool and hot. Instead, we get chided for our mom jeans, mom hair, mom cars, and mom bodies. We get scolded if we don’t dress modestly enough, but lambasted if we don’t try our hardest to look stylish and put together. We have to walk the careful line between being the most devoted, Pinterest perfect parent in the world but also not “letting ourselves go” or “losing ourselves to motherhood.”

Motherhood renders women sexless and ripe for public scrutiny, whereas fathers are allowed to retain their personhood. Fatherhood makes men hotter, more interesting, more relatable, and more successful. Sure, Ryan Reynolds has a new movie coming out, but when in recent history can you recall another time where we could scarcely go a few hours without seeing his name in the headlines? His wife gives birth, and boom! Suddenly he’s the most interesting man in the world. Meanwhile, we’ll all die holding our breaths while we wait for Blake Lively’s equivalent “Sexiest Mom Alive” honor.

Ryan Reynolds may very well be the Sexiest Dad Alive — he’s certainly got my vote — but it’d be nice if we could celebrate women and motherhood the same way we worship men once they become fathers; if we could treat women as though parenthood adds another interesting dimension to who they are, rather than acting as though it replaces their identities entirely. It’d be nice if, just once, we stopped acting like having a penis is the sole requirement for retaining your personality, appeal, and sexuality post-parenthood.