This Ode To The 'Hot Mess Mom' Will Make You Feel So Seen

This Ode To The ‘Hot Mess Mom’ Will Make You Feel So Seen

Image via Sia Cooper

Sia Cooper gets real about being a “hot mess mom”

Parenting is hard work. I don’t care who you are, how much help you have, or what stage your child is in. It’s an all-consuming, never-ending job and more often than not, we are judged on the things we are doing wrong instead of the things we manage to get right. One mom perfectly captured this while giving us an honest look into her struggles and insecurities — ones that will sound exactly like your own.

“What is up with this crazy idea that moms have to be made up, have a spotless house, have dinner on the table at 5pm, and raise well behaved, organically fed kids? Because of this unrealistic stigma, we are left feeling like a hot mess,” mom-of-two, Sia Cooper, shared. “Cue mom-shaming.”

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Hi, I’m Sia and I’m a Hot Mess Mom. What is up with this crazy idea that moms have to be made up, have a spotless house, have dinner on the table at 5pm, and raise well behaved, organically fed kids? Because of this unrealistic stigma, we are left feeling like a hot mess. Cue mom-shaming. Confessions: I cried 3 or 4 times last week after staying home with my sick kids. Coffee isn’t just my morning beverage, sometimes it’s 2/3 of my meals. The laundry pile hardly ever moves and sometimes I will grab clean clothes from the dryer because I haven’t folded it yet. My son asked me why I have hair under my armpits because I forgot to shave for last week. Depression and anxiety tell me that I’m not a good mother, but I take pills daily to fight this. Sometimes my kids eat popsicles at 8am because it’s not worth the battle. My sink is starting to look like the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Before pregnancy, I told myself my kids would never have screen time. HA. Sometimes I’m just too tired to even think about sex with my husband. My house looks like I’m losing a game of Jumanji. I suck at balancing work and family life. Ive been wearing the same leggings for so many days, I’ve lost count. More often than not, I feel like I’m failing as a mom. But you know what? Kids won’t remember that big stack of dishes or the dirty floors but they WILL remember you giving a damn about them making sure they’re fed-even if it’s just macaroni and chicken nuggets-warm, safe, wanted, and content. Cheers to all the hot mess moms who don’t have their shit together, but are still trying.

A post shared by SIA | FITNESS WORKOUTS RECIPES (@diaryofafitmommyofficial) on

Cooper, writer and nurse turned-NASM certified personal trainer who runs the popular Instagram account and Facebook page Diary of a Fit Mommy, continued a list of confessions that sounds like a page from a book out of most parent’s lives. “I cried 3 or 4 times last week after staying home with my sick kids,” she writes. “The laundry pile hardly ever moves and sometimes I will grab clean clothes from the dryer because I haven’t folded it yet. Depression and anxiety tell me that I’m not a good mother, but I take pills daily to fight this.”

She continues, “Sometimes my kids eat popsicles at 8am because it’s not worth the battle. Sometimes I’m just too tired to even think about sex with my husband. My house looks like I’m losing a game of Jumanji.”

Sounds familiar, right?

Cooper tells Scary Mommy she felt the need to post this publicly because we are constantly inundated with images of moms who seem to have it all together.  “It can leave us feeling inadequate,” she said. “We feel like we cannot relate to them so we feel inferior; therefore, we suffer in silence wondering what the hell we are doing wrong here. No mom REALLY wants to admit they don’t have it all figured out because it is viewed as a weakness.”

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This photo right here 100% sums up motherhood. Whenever I am trying to do something, my little ones always want me.. yet when I am not busy, they don't. Funny how that works, right? I was cooking while my little one jumped into the photo and wanted to be held. When I make dinner, I am usually doing 100 other different things at the same time. I have been using @hellofresh meal delivery service for over 2 years now and it is a lifesaver thanks to the easy recipe cards and yummy meals delivered straight to my door step every Monday. It also gives me something to look forward to every week and the kids can help if they want. Want 6 free meals? Use the following link and my code DOAFMO60: https://bit.ly/2Bz4bwf #hellofreshpics #freshfriends #getcooking #hellofreshpartner

A post shared by SIA | FITNESS WORKOUTS RECIPES (@diaryofafitmommyofficial) on

“More often than not, I feel like I’m failing as a mom,” Cooper continued in her post. “But you know what? Kids won’t remember that big stack of dishes or the dirty floors but they WILL remember you giving a damn about them making sure they’re fed-even if it’s just macaroni and chicken nuggets-warm, safe, wanted, and content.”

Cooper says she hopes her post makes other moms know they aren’t the only ones struggling, that we aren’t alone. “Motherhood is a struggle that we often do not see, especially on social media. Some moms need to be reminded that they are doing the best that they can and there is no need for comparison because we all do what is best for our families in the end.”

Amen to that.