Slow Down, Asshole!

The whole neighborhood is talking about me. I mean, I would be talking about me too, if I saw myself standing out there in the middle of the street shouting down cars like a crazy lady. But, of course, I have a perfectly understandable reason for my behavior: It’s that people can’t drive.

They speed down residential streets where children pounce like puppies. They don’t even pretend that the glaring red octagon of civil law means anything. I’m not even talking about a slow, look both ways roll-thru; I’m talking blowing it, full on.

Unless they are all illiterate pregnant women about to give birth, this is a problem.

On any given day, anywhere between three and eight children populate my front lawn. They play running bases. They play soccer. They have baseball catches, frisbee throws, water balloon fights.

I stand on my lawn surrounded by the running children, and in between handing out ice pops or chatting with a friend, loudly scream at offending vehicles, “Slow down!” Or, “Are you kidding me??” They have even inadvertently taught my children a new dirty word or two. So that now before I even pull up my druthers and set my face in a scowl, I might hear my five year-old next to me take the words out of my mouth, “What’s your rush, asshole?”

I am simultaneously mortified and proud.

Sometimes I aggressively stand in the street, forcing them to slow down. On one occasion, I snapped a picture of a license plate. On more than one occasion, I was embarrassed to discover it was a neighbor I was shouting at. But then, I wasn’t embarrassed, because I have children to protect.

Although dirty, shocked looks and fingers abound, no one had ever confronted me, until today. As I was unloading groceries in front of my house, a black car pulled up next to me. The window slid down and a woman I didn’t recognize called out, “I’ve been waiting to catch you for months now.”

Uh oh.

“Yeah, you yelled at me to slow down.”

Shit. “Really?” I wanted to take as tough of a stance as I did from a distance but I was also afraid she was going to yell at me, “Uh, well I’m not sure…Um…”

“I just wanted to apologize and tell you that you were right.”

“Oh.”

She went on to tell me that she had given me a WTF hand gesture at the time, but then realized that she had been going too fast, especially down a residential street. She had been waiting to catch me for months to tell me that she now drives much slower and with greater care.

Well, hot damn.

So while my kids are out there chasing balls, you’ll find me out there with them chasing cars.

A mom’s got to do what a mom’s got to do.

About the writer

@icescreammama

Alisa Schindler is a SAHM of three boys and wife to Mr. Baseball. In between schlepping to the ball fields and burning cupcakes, she chronicles the sweet and bittersweet of life in the suburbs on her blog icescreammama.com. Her essays have been featured on NYT Motherlode, Scary Mommy, Mamapedia.com and Erma Bombeck’s Writers Workshop, as well as Huffington Post and WhatToExpect.com, where she is a regular contributor. She has just completed a sexy women’s fiction novel that she would love you to read.

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Judie 3 months ago

My neighbor makes us proud like that! She would yell,throw shoes or chalk at cars. Once hit a delivery guy in cheek with chalk as he flew by with window down and music blasting! One evening 2 guys, following closely and too fast, had a fender bender because of speed and her yelling at them. The cops gently reminded her that she caused the distraction by yelling. We all knew it was speed and following too close! Now we hope she will soon continue her supervision,being that it could have been a kid involved when they don’t have time to stop!! We live in a trailer park where the entrance comes off a road with 50+mph speed limit. Many barely slow down as they enter the park!

Joe Cooke 3 months ago

I’m that kid. Or was. I was seven years or so, new library card, learned to ride my bike a week or so prior. Struck by a car. A woman coming out of the A&P parking lot. Two things that saved my life: my brother turned back and yelled, “Look out.” Caught someone’s attention, but I couldn’t avoid getting bounced off the bumper onto the road. Another car came rolling up about the same time. Probably annoyed to find himself about to collide with another car, he screamed on the brakes and began to curse loudly at me. Something tells me that both of them were more afraid than I was at that moment, as I cringed in pain on the pavement like a little ant about to be stomped by a big rubber boot. I just asked God for another chance. “Shoulda listened to my mom.” She had told me not to leave the yard. Too late for that now. Yes, my brother tried to save me. But the fact that two adults tried to run me over at the same time actually saved my life. (From considering the object from multiple perspectives, ideally we arrive at transcendence: objectivity. Or so said Husserl.) No lie. People have been shamed into not caring; it’s just not efficient. But like the little yellow sign says: “Watch out for children.” They don’t know what’s up, so look out for them.

momof6 3 months ago

Let me preface this by saying, I completely understand the safety concerns of parents. I have tried to always go out of my way to live in neighborhoods filled with kids. 3 out of the 4 houses my kids have lived in were on the end of cul-de-sacs, selected specifically for the reduced traffic. I have seen plenty of moron drivers speeding down the roads and not paying attention to what they were doing and thought- I hope to God they are not teaching their teenagers to drive like them. We have even had a tragic death in one of our neighborhoods when a child was hit in their front yard by an idiot driver. That said, throwing things at moving cars is a crime. Teaching your children do throw things in the road at moving cars is just asking for an accident and approving criminal behavior in your children. That’s like saying “Hey these drivers are breaking rules so it’s OK to break rules also.” While drivers need to follow road rules- roads ARE for driving and they are not for playing. The best way to prevent accidents is to teach your child NOT to run into the road after their ball or to play in the street- even a driver following the 25 MPH road limit may not be able to stop on time to avoid hitting your kid. Additionally, having lived at the end of 3 streets I have grown well used to kids who have zero respect for cars. They skateboard down the middle of the road without ever getting out of the way of traffic. Kids come down their driveway and run across the stree to go to a friends house without ever looking both ways. I have neighbors who have made me drive 4 house lengths behind their daughters Barbie jeep waving and smilling withouth ever moving her out of the way- yes, your daughter is cute, but the speed limit is not 3MPH. As the mother of 6, I routinely try to stay around 10MPH because I know the 30 or so kids on my block won’t stop for me- I have to stop for them. However, these kids won’t always live in a bubble and I don’t think we’re doing kids any fovors treating them like the world revolves around them.

someone 3 months ago

Wow! 23 pages of comments already! Well I doubt many will read this one amongst the rest, but I just wanted to point out that shouting at people isn’t actually helpful. It’s nice that it worked that one time, but it can also backfire, as some people will go even faster just to spite you. Or it can lead to other needless confrontations. One thing you can do is request that police patrol an area at a certain time of day, which is great because it takes you entirely out of the confrontation equation. I wish the article would have spoken more about constructive ways to stop the problem rather than just talk about something everyone already knows is a problem (23 pages to attest).

kat 4 months ago

I’ve been that mom too. Especially with bus stops. I had a habit of standing in the middle of a busy street just of the highway to make people stop. One lady would fly past even if the kids were crossing. One day I stood there with my 90 pound Great Pyranese. She stopped, I ordered my dog to stay so she wouldn’t drive off once I moved like the day before, I cussed her up one side then the other while the bus driver shouted out “you tell em” and “that’s right” from the only open window (his, he made sure of that cause he knew what was coming). Once I was done the kids unloaded and I ordered my dog to go with them. I don’t know if it was the massive well trained dog or my heavly tattooed self screaming at her but whichever, it worked and she passed by 10min before the bus and at a much slower speed

Gmama 4 months ago

13 kids living on our block and we are often the host house. We spent three years fighting to get a speed sign posted, a squad car parked and the portable speed tracker. A 20 year old thought it was funny to antagonize us, so he would purpousfully slow and then gun it in front of our house. One evening he drove by 14 times in two hours. We ended up filing a restraining order and when he contested, we won in court. The judge sent a three page memorandum basically calling the kid a piece of sh*t. It has improved life, but the speeding never seems to end.

Heather 4 months ago

Sorry meant to call them “nut” jobs. Spellcheck changed it.

Heather 4 months ago

I’m the same way. I have a profoundly deaf 8 year old child although she wears cochlear implants. But she still has to search for sound. She also has CHARGE Syndrome which brings up a host of other issues. I also have a 9 year old. They love to play in our front yard. My next door neighbor comes out of her driveway driving 60 it seems and we have several other but jobs hauling butt. I don’t sit idly by. I yell also. I have to protect my babies.

Herbert norton 4 months ago

word! We live in a great neighborhood but on a long straight street. Since we always have balls in the front yard I throw one in front of speeding assholes(mostly men) and record their license numbers. That way when they ever stop I can tell them the police have their plates. I love moms who yell at speeders!

Shayna 4 months ago

This is me too!!! Everyone jokes that I’m the crazy lady on the corner, but I’m the one with the stop sign in her right of way that everyone blows right through :( Thank you for writing this!!!!!

Jenny 4 months ago

We worked hard to get a speed bump installed on our street which is a main thoroughfare in our neighborhood. Unfortunately, it’s more of a “speed suggestion” than an actual bump, so SUVs, pickups, and those pickup/trailer lawn care company combinations (who always seem to be in a big toot to get everywhere) just sail over it with hardly a jostle. I don’t throw actual objects, just some serious passive aggressive stink eye, while I mouth “Slowwww dowwwnnnn.”

Carrie 4 months ago

Our driveway is smack dab in the middle of a three way stop – and when we first moved in i joked that everyone would be stopping at our house – boy was i wrong! My neighbors fly through the stop sign like its a NASCAR race! I am also the crazy lady in the middle of the street flagging down speeders and scaring the sh!t out of them as I’ve been known to fake jump from my driveway…. they still haven’t learned.

Dina Francia 4 months ago

I can totally relate. While construction on the bridge parallel to my street, has all the traffic detoured to our street, they are driving on a residential street way too fast.

Sally Smith 4 months ago

I don’t have kids, but I live a block from an elementary school. I love kids and dogs, so I guess I’m the scary neighbor. I will jump in front of a car to protect them. I will take pictures, call the police, do whatever it takes to make sure they are safe. And, by the way, if I see the kids (or dogs) doing something unsafe, I will tell them to stop, in no uncertain terms. If I know how to reach you, I will call you. If not, I will treat them as if they were my own. That means I will likely ask them if they realize that what they are doing is unsafe. I will expect them to use yes ma’am or no ma’am. I will treat them with respect, but I will be firm. So, if I call you to report your kids’ unsafe behavior, please don’t yell at me. I wouldn’t be calling just for fun. I’m trying to help!

Gretchen 4 months ago

Totally agree with you! You are doing the right thing. As a Mom who’s 8 year old was hit by a car while riding his bike right next to our home 3 weeks ago, I totally support any and all measures to keep the idiots off the streets. The lady who hit him said she was only going 5 miles per hour after already having seen the friend my son was riding bikes with. She should have been stopped completely. And, I do not believe for one second she was only going 5 mph. She hit my son from the side crushing his left leg between his bike and her car, then throwing him over the hood of her car as his bike went flying down the road. The kids said they heard screeching as in brakes and skidding sooo… my son managed to get away with just a broken left tibia, thank God he was wearing his helmet! I love what you are doing and I will be doing the same thing from now on :)

Jeanie 4 months ago

i do the same thing! Glad I am not the only crazy mom out there!

Emily 4 months ago

My small neighborhood has posted 15MPH speed limit signs, yet that does not stop people from driving as if they’re on a race track. Because of the placement of my house, I can see them coming. There have been several occasions where I’ve tossed a ball into the street as they approach my house. It gets them to slow down – and I remind them to drive slower (in a very loud voice!).

What irks me the most this that when something happens to THEIR child, these drivers will be the ones pissing and moaning about how people fail to obey the posted speed limits.

Emily 4 months ago

That works! In my experience, a red ball is most effective!

Greg 4 months ago

“And Federal law states when church/school is in session the speed limit for 100yds on either side and directly in-front of is 25mph.”

Zeb, care to cite your source? That’s a new one for me. Most traffic laws are state and city controlled unless it’s a Federal highway.

Keriann 4 months ago

Took the words right out of my mouth!

Keriann 4 months ago

It shouldn’t need to be said that children have the right to play outside without fear of getting run down by drivers who don’t care about the law, but unfortunately it does. A few years ago a little boy in my neighborhood got hit by a car while WAITING FOR THE BUS and to compound the matter, the driver just kept on driving! I would encourage all parents to say (or yell) something at these people because kids aren’t responsible for defending their own safety. That’s our job.

Aimee P 4 months ago

But again…when did the street become the playground? I get that kids and toddlers are fast and can get away, blah blah blah. But why are they playing in the street? I go the speed limit when I go to my mom’s house. And yet it never fails, that I HAVE TO STOP to let the kids finish playing basketball before I can DRIVE ON THE ROAD. The road is for driving not for playing.

Kaka birdie 4 months ago

My mom did the very same except with a broom in hand. Everyone would talk about it. Unfortunately I think it had the opposite effect, at times, than you got, as the teenagers thought it was hilarious and would do it just to get her to run out and chase them.

Carrie W 4 months ago

This is my life. I live directly across the street from an elementary school playground. Not only are people speeding, but seem completely oblivious to the fact that the school zone speed limit applies whenever children are present, not just during school hours. Children are almost always present, so I am almost always yelling at someone. This is my life.

Zeb M. Cheek 4 months ago

I’m that Dad. I got kicked out of my church for it. A fellow was blasting past our church on his 4-wheeler so I yelled at him to slow down. (We always have kids outside playing. And Federal law states when church/school is in session the speed limit for 100yds on either side and directly in-front of is 25mph. – He was going well over 60.)
His dad (the guy is older than I am, but his Dad got mad at me) got in my face started shouting, we brawled, I was kicked out of church.
I regret nothing. Guy was an asshole for going that fast. Dad was an asshole for condoning it. I have since found a new church with strict enforcement of speed regulations.

Carrie-Lee 4 months ago

I’m that mom, too. I live on short street with 5 homes and a 90 degree turn right after my house. Anything over 15-20 is way too much on this road with 4 kids and 4 dogs on it. So I got fed up. Last week I wrote a community request to take more responsibility and ask people to slow down. Typed it out, short and sweet and out it in the offenders mailboxes!

Ellen 4 months ago

I want to applaud you simply for being in your yard. Not everyone does that Thank you for standing out there with your young children in the first place. I live at the end of a cul-de-sac. My kids love being outside. Our backyard tends to flood, so they are often out front. People (including myself on occasion I am ashamed to say) speed down to turn around at the cul-de-sac. I always am in the yard watching or at least in the front area of the house watching over them. There was a mom down the street, with a similar amount of kids (4 plus), who didn’t. She lived at the half-way point and would let her little kids (talking prek/toddler), run in and out of her yard, into the street, etc. The kids would just stand in the street and stare at you, not moving, until you inched closer and kind of told them to move. They weren’t afraid of cars at all. One day I was driving, slowly. There was a car parked on the near side of their driveway, blocking view of the driveway. I knew her kids were out, so I was creeping. Seconds before I got to their driveway, her 3 year old shot out of the drive on a big wheel bike (those little things that scoot along the ground) into the drive across the street. If I had been going ANY faster I would’ve hit him. That scared the crap out of me. I drive slow through all neighborhoods now, even slower than I did before. Thank you for being there to watch your kids. That lady never was and I’ve noticed recently that they haven’t been outside in a while. We’ve been away on vacation, I’m really hopng nothing happened. Drive slow, watch your kids.

Sam 4 months ago

Call the police! We’re in Omaha and they’ll send a car out to patrol a certain street or area where cars like to speed. I did this to my asshole neighbor a few months back!

amanda 4 months ago

because kids dont think when the ball rolls across the street, because cars fly farther than you think when they hit something, because there are speed limits for a reason, because toddlers wander faster than mom and dad can run sometimes, because cars are weapons. if the kids in the street bother you when you go to your mom’s toot the horn.

amanda 4 months ago

i take pictures of the drivers who pass the stopped schoolbus. thankfully there is a big backyard away from traffic for my kids to play in, but if they are n the front, i’m that mom too.

Aimee P 4 months ago

I’ll play Devil’s Advocate here….since when did the road become a child’s playground? I do not live in a subdivision and this is one of the major reasons why. However, I do have to drive through one to go visit my mother. And any given time, I am having to weave in and out of parked cars and I HAVE TO STOP because the kids playing basketball won’t stop playing when they see I am getting close. No…I have to stop and let them finish their play. I totally support you if your kids are in your yard playing, but the street is for driving. What is wrong with the back yard? For those playing basketball, what is wrong with the driveway? Since when did the road of a subdivision become a playground??

Sharon Greenthal 4 months ago

My neighbor and I used to stand outside and yell at drivers – and more often than not it was a teenager, unfortunately. Now our kids are grown but I still get furious when I see people driving like lunatics in my suburban community.

Carol 4 months ago

Amen. I even went down to our fire department during a meeting and gave it to them. They got the message. Yelling at these a…holes is useless. My kids said to be careful cause they carry guns now. Oh well, one dead Bitch.

Stephanie N 4 months ago

I live at the corner of a three way stop that NOBODY stops at-not even school busses.

Liz 4 months ago

our street is a horseshoe – no where to get but home or the end of the street so it’s mostly neighbors flying up & down while we are out front & the only person I’ve yelled at is also a high up Boston cop whose wife has told me how many times she’s been pulled over for speeding 60+ down tow roads but as soon as cops see her last name they wave her on! And this guy had the balls to tell me he wasn’t speeding when he literally was going so fast by my 18 month old at the time & I – that she started screaming crying bc it scared her! No reason to go over 25 on small residential street! This article shows pedestrian hit fatality rates based on speed go from 5% at 20 mph to 45% at 30 mph! http://humantransport.org/sidewalks/SpeedKills.htm

Sarah 4 months ago

Me too!

Bekah 4 months ago

I.am.not.alone. This makes me feel a little less crazy. My kids are mortified by my confrontational attitude when it comes to speeders in my neighborhood (and I don’t like drama). Strangely, they do not like when I stand in front of speeding motorcycles with my camera raised high. My neighbors know to come and stand quietly behind me, so I don’t get shot. Or at least there is a witness if I do.

sara 4 months ago

I swear I must have written this during our nap time today! I have one vehicle in our little neighborhood that flies down our street! Makes me so angry!

Janice 8 months ago

why do they speed? I just don’t understand why. I just want to get from a to b as safely as possible!

shellybean 10 months ago

We cant all adapt. I aint allowed to put up any kind of safety fence or anything where I live, even if I was allowed to I would love to know how I am supposed to afford it? I live right at a road that stupid fuckers fly down, how I wish they would put in speed bumps, and if I was allowed and could afford a fence, I would build one ten feet high…..but I cant. So the parents need to do this or that instead of throw fits about what other people do, its not always possible. Im glad you can afford to make those safety changes, but im sure im not the minority in saying “I CAN’T” so we yell at the people who drive 50 in a 25 down our neighborhood streets because they are self centered assholes who need to slow down!

Kristin 1 year ago

I’m the angry driver… Because the handful of times I have been yelled at I was going the speed limit. If your kids want to climb the snow banks left by the plow, and you find the 50km/h posted speed limit too fast to make that activity safe, petition the city. If they feel the speed limit should be lowered they will lower it. Until they lower it, move your kids further from the road or hold their hands.

On a side note, I don’t mind street hockey as long as you teach your kids to move right onto the grass the second they see a car. Kids that keep playing or just move over a bit should not be given permission to play street hockey without direct parent supervision.

Andrea 1 year ago

Yes, because engangering the lives of others is perfectly justified if another human being on this planet doesn’t comply with how YOU think people should live. There are more constructive and mature ways to make a point than standing in the street throwing shit at people. Be part of a solution instead of escalating the problem, FFS.

Alyssa 1 year ago

I’ve had a similar problem. I came to a complete stop behind some teenagers playing in the street because they weren’t paying attention, and I waited. When they finally saw me they glared at me. Oops, I’m sorry for paying attention and not hitting you. Luckily our neighborhood seems to have mostly decent drivers. I haven’t seen any maniacs since we moved in.

sara 1 year ago

With about 35 kids on the first half of the street I am constantly screaming at cars. This street is nice and smooth cause it was paved not quite a year ago so they fly. They have no regards to the children or the pets of those children. A few of the children have lost pets. People are idiots…

Awesome April 1 year ago

I love this. I am that mom too!

colleen 1 year ago

Yup, I yell at people too and shake my slow down sign as they come around the corner. The dads have also been known to hang out in the middle of the road.

Vanessa Hahn 1 year ago

Good for you! I’m that crazy neighbor too. My babies are the most important thing!

Kelly Ernest Kolmer 1 year ago

Love this!! My 2yo yells “slow down” at cars with me. :)

Amanda Matheny 1 year ago

That is great that you speak out against these speeders! It’s sad. I am visually impaired and thus cannot drive, yet I sometimes think I’d be able to drive better than half the maniacs with licenses out there! That is really great that your insistant yelling at people to slow down actually had an impact on that lady. I think I’d share your sentiment about being simultaneously proud and mortified at your 5-year-old imitating you, lmfao! Great read!

DeeDee 1 year ago

This is SO me, too. I have sat at the end of my driveway in a lawn chair, adult beverage in hand and yelled at cars to slow the heck down. I have those little “slow down a@@hole” signs that look like little kids holding flags. I have put them in the middle of the street.

And I want a megaphone for Christmas.

BC 1 year ago

While I think everyone should be aware while driving, I am of the opposite opinion on this one. I can’t stand when I pull into our neighborhood and all the parents are letting their kids play all over the streets. I understand if there isn’t another option, ie: no sidewalks or backyards, but our neighborhood has huge lawns and huge backyards. I don’t let my kids play in the street and if it’s avoidable I don’t think anyone else should either. I think it is not only risky but rude to the drivers. There’s only one place for a car to drive, don’t play there.

Ronda McCarthy 1 year ago

OMG… I am this MOM…

Sandy Broda 1 year ago

What if they lose control and drive into your lawn and your kids? Or hurt themselves? Terrible idea. Almost as bad as letting your kids play in the street. Front yard with supervision I can understand, but having a ball game in the street? I always wonder what their parents are thinking.

Rita Meier Pupo 1 year ago

We are furtunate enough to have found a house in a quiet circle, but I could see myself doing this for sure.

Maria Adams 1 year ago

My husband tells me I’m INSANE :-) If I am then I am for a VERY good reason. I think I’ll throw a ball into the road like Kelly Dillon’s dad suggested. As for parents driving WAY TOO FAST at school time, I tend to linger in the road (in my big red truck) for the kiddos to SAFELY walk across the street. Too many times I’ve seen parents in a rush to drop off their child almost hitting another child. I’m sure there are A LOT of parents that don’t like me but keeping children safe is MORE important.

Colleen Cossey 1 year ago

I have been this mom. I then found it was less stressful to roll balls into the street in front of these jackasses. Have their heart rate up instead of mine.

Jen Gerwig-Dively 1 year ago

The craziest driver on our street lives at the very end, in the cul-de-sac. Figures. She also has a 9yr old daughter. You think she’d know better. A new family moved in near the top of the street and they let their 7,4, and 2 (yeah, 2) year old kids play in the street unsupervised. Needless to say a lot of the homeowners on the street are dreading where this is likely to go. (The new homeowners have been here long enough to know how busy the street is.)

bodynsoil 1 year ago

Don’t mess with a mamma bear protecting her cubs.. Good work getting the message out there.

Natalie Ramsey 1 year ago

Love this!!!

Leslie 1 year ago

I run 4-6 days a week in our neighborhood and those surrounding it. I’m always hyper-aware of drivers and cars, whether it is seeing brake lights appear on a car parked ahead of me in a driveway or hearing a car start nearby or seeing a car heading in my direction. This morning, I observed a gray SUV heading down a street perpendicular to the one I was running down. I was on the left side of the street, wearing a fluorescent yellow shirt and in plain view of the driver, if she had looked in my direction. She was driving at a speed that led me to believe that she was hoping to not stop at the stop sign that was rapidly approaching. She was looking to her left and continued to do so as she went through the stop sign and began making a wide right turn onto the street I was running on. Had I not noticed her total obliviousness to the right side of her world, I wouldn’t have retreated to the curb or chosen (by force to avoid certain collision with her) to turn down her street. I raised both arms in protest to attempt one final time to alert her that she was not the only person on the road. She finally saw me and slammed on her breaks and then gave me a huge look of disdain as though it was somehow my fault that she almost ran me down less than 2 miles from my own home. She wasn’t on her phone, she was just in a hurry. If I had been an unobservant child or even another vehicle, she would have been in a wreck. I have a friend who lives down the road from this site and when I replayed this story to her (leaving out the color and type of car), her first response was, “Was she driving a gray SUV?” Maybe her experience today will alert her to the world around her and help her to slow down. I’m happy to hear that you have helped at least one driver reconsider their speed in your neighborhood.

Cameron Hurrell 1 year ago

You a cop? No? Not qualified to judge if a person’s speeding then. I’m sick of parents who insist it’s me that needs to watch for their kid. Parent is a verb as well as a noun

Kristina Costello 1 year ago

I do this on a regular basis. We live in a rural area with a ritzy golf course up the road and the rich idiots in their bmw’s & lexus convertibles go flying around the corner, which is so narrow, it may as well be one lane. I’ve almost been hit myself just trying to get my mail. Did I mention a state trooper lives across the street and parks his car along the road? Nobody cares! Drives me mad!

Rebecca Simmons 1 year ago

I do the exact same thing!

Deborah Hawkins 1 year ago

I too mostly get hand gestures, but I did have 1 person ask me what I expected. Sure enough he did it every time. I still stand in the road. 😛 Miss you and Summer both!

E 1 year ago

I actually agree with the “world shouldn’t be censored to protect my precious little miracle” sentiment. HOWEVER saying “survival of the fittest” when you’re talking about children being injured or killed while playing in their neighborhoods is pretty damn heartless.
We’re not talking about questionable language or clothing choices. Speeders/reckless drivers on residential streets are breaking the laws (which exist to PROTECT PEOPLE) and there’s absolutely NO reason to break those laws other than being extremely selfish and lacking respect for human life. Of course I don’t allow my 2 yr old to roam the streets unsupervised (or supervised) but lots of other parents around here DO allow their kids to ride bikes, play ball, etc and our city-maintained sidewalks are in such poor condition they are literally unusable even by those in wheelchairs. As I unload my groceries it takes literally 1-2 seconds for my toddler to run to the roadside. She has to hold my hand but there have been a couple times she’s slipped out and I’ve ended up running my pregnant butt down the driveway to grab her. Someone going 20mph would hurt her; flying down my road at 45mph would KILL her. I wouldn’t want to live with the loss of my daughter due to 2 second lapse in my ‘perfect parenting’, and I’m pretty sure the driver wouldn’t feel so great about it either, regardless of lacking “love” for my spawn. Sorry but your argument is plain old cruel and inhumane. The desire to drive recklessly in residential areas should NEVER outweigh someone’s safety.

Charlie Hamilton 1 year ago

I do this too

Therese Glowaski 1 year ago

Hahahaha Angela Bisiker I read the line “slow down asshole” and knew exactly what the article was about. Thanks for helping me lmao this morning xx

Alexandra Jung 1 year ago

I used to throw my keys at them!

Nicolle Martin 1 year ago

Hilarious! Love this mom’s guts! I just sit and fume!

Debbie Newton 1 year ago

Every time we see a car coming down the street I pull my kids off to one side. Well two weeks ago, some *insert foul language* decided to speed through, less than 5ft away from my 2 year old on his tricycle, even though she saw me trying to get to him to pull him to one side. I yelled “Thanks for slowing down”, to which she got about a house down, stopped and then yelled something back. When she came back down the street, she was going even faster and was yelling obscenities at me. I yelled for my husband to stay with the kids, I grabbed my cell phone, and the keys to my truck and I took off after her. I found her and blocked her into her driveway while I called the cops. The cops showed up and after getting my side and then her side, he came back to me and said that while there was nothing he could do since it was her word against mine, that he got the feeling that she understood that down my road, there are certain rules lol. I will do whatever I have to do to protect my children. End of story.

Brandi Hugo-Garris 1 year ago

A neighbor’s friend used to speed on the cul de sac I grew up on. I have 4 little bros and sisters, the youngest was two and I was washing my car. After telling this guy repeatedly to slow down, fate would have it that I had a hose in my hand one day. I sprayed him (with the window down, too) and let him know that was the final warning. He was pissed, but the army of little kids behind him convinced him not to do it ever again. I did not feel guilty and I’d do it again in a heartbeat. Especially after multiple warnings!

Mary Panstingel 1 year ago

Thanks. It only takes ONE car to hurt somebody – I’d rather be overprotective than missing my kids.

Clarissa 1 year ago

In my apartment complex it doesn’t matter how slow you are going the kids (sadly older ones) won’t move… either they glare at you and you have to wait as they slowly walk off the road or they continue standing there talking and you have to carefully drive around them

Micki Walton 1 year ago

I had a similar incident a few weeks ago where I yelled at the driver who ran a stop sign while I was crossing the street with my toddler and dog. Unfortunately (for the driver) we were walking the dog right near his house, and after he stormed out of his car and into his home, my dog promptly pooped in his yard (I swear I didn’t make him do it). While I was picking it up in the baggie (and debating leaving said baggie on the driver’s windshield), the man stepped outside and heartily apologized. I was shocked, but it may me feel like I was actually being acknowledged as a human, instead of a road cone.
I still call out these drivers, especially when their windows are down;)

Nina Whiteman 1 year ago

I do the same thing. I actually was almost hit (on purpose) walking into the street on Halloween to slow a car down. Instead, it accelerated! It’s scary to think that parents believe that these issues don’t exist and allow their children to play in the street unsupervised. I guess that’s why I’m the only mom in the neighborhood yelling! :)

Cristina 1 year ago

Wow, you have restored my faith in this website!!!!

Jenn 1 year ago

THIS. IS. ME! Do NOT speed down my street. I am the crazy lady screaming at people flying through because there are so many kids that live in our neighborhood and on our street including my 4 year old. And he will definitely do the same thing. “Hey you need to slow down!” he will yell. Safety first!

Jenn 1 year ago

I’m so that mom! I have been known to roll a ball out in the middle of the street while they are flying down to prove a point. My neighnor across the street had her dog hit while standing on the edge of the lawn and all the little kids so it and were traumatized! I get the posts where people are saying just make the kids play in the back yard, but cant always do that and sometimes going to get out of a parked car can be taking your life into your hands in my neighborhood

Kristina Jewell 1 year ago

Evey day

Leah Johnsey 1 year ago

We put those out and someone ran over it while we were outside playing! People just don’t care.

Leah Johnsey 1 year ago

MamaB-I would understand your very {flawed} logic, if it weren’t for the fact that my child was almost hit by a teenager speeding down the road who was texting and swerved into my yard, and barely missed hitting my child. How would a fence have protected my child? Am I now supposed to tell my children they cannot ride their bikes in the driveway and must stay indoors because I have to punish them for other peoples lawlessness? Other people need to learn to have a sense of personal repsonsibilty as well and should not make me and my children feel like prisoners in our own home.

Annette Harvey Young 1 year ago

Totally guilty.

Susan Thomas 1 year ago

I threw a brick through a teenagers window. He finally got the message

Amber Turner 1 year ago

That’s me we stay in the back yard

Dottie Akin 1 year ago

I’ve done the same thing!!! So sick and tired of people speeding through our neighborhood, like it’s a race or something. It’s gotten so mosy parents don’t even let there kids outside anymore. Then tjere are a couple who see me out with my kids, and send there’s out expecting me to watch their kids to. Wouldn’t bother me if they would pay back sometimes and do the same, but they won’t. Then their kid hots mine and calls him ugly four letter words (wonder where they learned those) and all of a sudden I’m horrible cause I send them home. Yep, it’s about time to move, lol.

2ParkerBabies 1 year ago

I am that mom too. Even though we aren’t always playing in the front yard, we are out in the garage or driveway and it never ever fails… SOMEONE is hauling a$$ up or down my street. I’ve thrown soap-soaked sponges, keys, and even rocks, after yelling at them to slow down. Even if you don’t SEE any children, doesn’t it dawn on you you’re driving down a RESIDENTIAL street? The speed limit isn’t 60 mph. Seriously, someone drove so fast one day that it rocked my car. (And when I throw rocks, they’re teeny itty bitty pebble sized rocks people, not baseball sized…. and I’ve never actually hit a car). These drivers don’t even pay attention to the bright yellow little people signs with red flags some neighbors put out in the street. It’s pretty scary.

July Poulos-Mickelsen 1 year ago

Hell Ya! I do the same thing! Wth do these neighborhood people think that our street is a freeking speedway it pisses me off! And I don’t care who they are I yell at them! I am tired of these self righteous jerks thinking they can do fourty down our street! Just cause they don’t live on it!

Summer Johnston 1 year ago

Yes, this is exactly what it was like out there. Miss you guys.

Laura Husske 1 year ago

AWESOME!

Kerri Leehans Chesnutt 1 year ago

We can start throwing something at the windows :). I want to keep my babies and big kids around

Jennifer Favano 1 year ago
Cami Lobdell 1 year ago

We live in the exact middle of a VERY large apartment complex, and my kids and the neighbor kids are constantly in danger of people going *30+ mph without looking. I am that crazy mom that will stand out in the middle of the lot and stare down a car ripping through, the “Assholes!” and “Dickwads!” abound.

*note, the posted limit is 10mph

Jackie Perras Johnson 1 year ago

yes, she’s ok. Thank you…I should have clarified. It was pretty terrifying and she spent some time in the hospital and has some nerve damage but she’s alive and well now. <3

Kelly Enders-Tharp 1 year ago

Yep. This is me too. We have a Melissa & Doug easel that we post up on our corner that points to the stop sign and says, “STOP HERE” . . . our jerks run it and almost hit the neighborhood kids. If they stop, someone yells “car” and all the kids scatter to the sidewalks. If they run it, not enough time!

Now, my approach is more of a direct eye contact through their windshield as I walk towards them shouting, “STOP SIGN!!!!” pointing at the one they just ran. Although after the Kevin Ward Jr. death, I may need to rethink my strategy.

Rosemary Covney Gangloff 1 year ago

Good for her!!

Kelly 1 year ago

Yep. This is me too. We have a Melissa & Doug easel that we post up on our corner that points to the stop sign and says, “STOP HERE” . . . our jerks run it and almost hit the neighborhood kids. If they stop, someone yells “car” and all the kids scatter to the sidewalks. If they run it, not enough time!

Now, my approach is more of a direct eye contact through their windshield as I walk towards them shouting, “STOP SIGN!!!!” pointing at the one they just ran. Although after the Kevin Ward Jr. death, I may need to rethink my strategy.

Susan Bonifant 1 year ago

Wow, the rolling ball comment. That would have changed a LOT of bad driving habits for me. And, if people could actually imagine those moments after a terrible mistake that would do it too.

Frankie Laursen 1 year ago

If it weren’t against the law, I’d be tempted to throw ninja stars at the tires of speeding cars.

Kudos to you for really doing something about it and even changing someone’s driving for the better. Thank you!

Felicia Nelson Schatz 1 year ago

Sounds reasonable to me…

Cary 1 year ago

I like to be “that” guy that is driving slowly (20 is plenty) through residential neighborhoods as traffic piles up behind him. I live near a University, and it is not uncommon for students to get run over crossing the street. I don’t want that to happen to a child on my street. That was awfully nice of that driver to stop by and say something.

Aimee Hempy-De La Cruz 1 year ago

LOVE! That’s sooo me and my son!

Aimee Hempy-De La Cruz 1 year ago

HA! Agreed!!! And i’ve got to bring back ‘twat’ – I miss that word!

Aimee Hempy-De La Cruz 1 year ago

I love you I love you I love you!!!! This is SO ME! Yay I’m not alone!

Rebecca Wilber 1 year ago

Best.Mom.Ever. protecting your kids is always your priority. Good job!

Kim Michalak 1 year ago

That is me! Out there hollering at the speeders or the ones blowing the stop sign and almost hitting me coming out of my driveway. I am tired of the careless speeders. And yes many of them are the parents rushing in and out of the development to get their kids at school.

Jen Ford 1 year ago

Ha! This is totally me!!! somehow I don’t think I’ll have anyone stop and apologize but who knows. My only real hope is that any of them that I’ve yelled at or thrown my hands in the air at would have a passing thought of ‘holy crap, I almost hit that kid, maybe I should slow the eff down’….

Leanne Clayton Seewald 1 year ago

There is a sign you can buy now, for your front yard or put it closer to the street… It says ‘Drive like YOUR children live here’ … Fortunately our neighborhood is really good about folks driving slow and carefully but I have lived in some that people treated the streets like a drag racing convention

Nicole Wildt Dela Pena 1 year ago

Hahaha i Like this…

Lisa Sanderson McWhorter 1 year ago

I told my husband I’m buying an old stroller just to do this very thing. :)

Patrice Janyska 1 year ago

Don’t throw things into the street, if they swerve and hit a child you will never forgive yourself. We bought a bunch of the kids at play signs at Walmart that look like little kids and put them in the road so people had to slow down to get past them.

mamabear 1 year ago

I had one so fast down my street that even the 2 yr old said whoa! I’m gonna start being that mom.

Vicci B. Chuc 1 year ago

I had a run in at the end of the school year. We walk down a street where there are no sidewalks and comes up behind the area school. People speed down that street, there are signs to reduce the speed limit around the school but most don’t pay attention. Just before the end of the school year I was taking my little guy to school, he is 7. There is a cross walk for us to cross through, which I have taught both my children the rules for crossing. On this lovely morning my little man, who was still sitting on his bike but walking it with his feet, and I were crossing in the crosswalk and to my right I see a vehicle coming, and I hope he slows down, which he did for a second without every actually stopping until I screamed at him. While watching him my little guy actually fell in the crosswalk with his bike, and as I turn to see what has happened, the asshole in the vehicle drives around my fallen child. Oh I lost my shit all over him, even after he rolled down his window to tell me he had every right to proceed through the crosswalk because we were “almost” on the other side!!! WTF??? So through my screaming at this man that what he did is illegal, I pick my boy up and make sure he is okay, and proceed to keep yelling at the asshole about how what he has done is illegal and extremely unsafe for the fact that my son had fallen and he drove around him. Seconds after the yelling has stopped my son tells me that the man is a father of a classmate, I had a small panic then thought “fuck that, no way am I going to let him get away with what he did”, so I tell my son that in no way is he to be angry with the classmate since he didn’t do it, he was only a passenger. And unfortunately he did try to start something, and I told him straight out with everyone to hear, that in no way is a child responsible for their parents actions. It’s a scary world out there and people honestly need to slow the fuck down and pay attention to the world around them. There are places that proudly sport signs that say “Slow Down We Love Our Children”, all streets should have them!!!

Mandy Lahey 1 year ago

I used to do that all the time

Lauren 1 year ago

I second Lisa. While I totally get the motive behind the flinging, know that depending upon the laws of your state, the driver on the receiving end of that toss could have you charged…with throwing a missile. Think not? A family friend received house arrest for simply being in the back seat of a car, while the front passenger threw a partially empty Coke bottle at a car they knew going about 30 mph. It is considered assault and, in that case, a deadly weapon (missile), as the driver could swerve and hurt themselves, others, or worse. Better to let fingers fly than objects!

Toad’s Mom 1 year ago

I am one of those mothers who believes that children should not be playing out in the street. No matter where you live. I live on a cul-de-sac and would love to have my five year old ride a bike, roller skate, draw with sidewalk chalk, ect… but, no way. My neighbors FLY pass my house at all hours. When they (or their friends) are high they speed backwards across my lawn. True story. Someone on my street put up a fluorescent, child shaped, slow down sign and I had the horrified privilege of witness it being ran over and caught in the wheel well of a truck. Our neighbor’s teenage son was out skate boarding in the street. Drunk driver hit and killed his friend right in front of him. This is why I do not let my son play in the road. Drivers are distracted, don’t care and some times just cannot see your child. Any road is dangerous. Please, find a new place for your children to play.

Katie Spencer 1 year ago

Sounds like me! People drive way too fast down our street. Pisses me off somethin fierce!

Christy Petrocco 1 year ago

This totally sounds like what I have been doing all damned summer.

Chrissy Lawlis 1 year ago

Crazy Mommy can come out anytime to protect her babies

Shanna 1 year ago

As a mom, and a witness to a two year old being run over and killed in front of my home for THIS EXACT SITUATION, I applaud you for being “that lady”. I live on a street that people fly down to avoid going through the construction of downtown. I was having a yard sale and the mother was perusing my junk while her children played with mine. The toddler wandered to the edge of the yard and as the speeding idiot swerved into my grass to avoid the speed bump, she struck the child. She was going so fast she didn’t even realized she’d hit the baby for about 100 yards. She then attempted to back up and flee the scene. It was horrifying and I will never ever forget it…. if it takes screaming, cursing, throwing rocks, then so be it. No child deserves to be run over and killed because you’re in a hurry.

Leslie M 1 year ago

I am so that mom too! We live in a developement with approximately 50 houses. One way in, One way out, about 25 kids running around at any given time and really the only traffic we have are the people that live here and any visitors. You would THINK/HOPE with their children running around the neighborhood they would be more careful – afraid not. I and my husband have on more than one occassion stepped in front of a car and made them stop. I am always yelling slow down, I have even put our yellow man with the flag (we call him Henry) in the middle of the road, only to have people swerve around it and keep going. It blows my mind, what is the big rush? Time goes by fast enough, pay attention and SLOW DOWN!!

Jess 1 year ago

YES. This is exactly us. I had the pleasure of meeting one of my “neighbors” down the street at my son’s baseball game. I was like, “Hi I’m Jess.” She was like, “Hi Jess. I know who you are and that you live at the top of the hill. We always drive the speed limit.” I was stunned. But good. They should drive the speed limit down a 30 MPH residential cul-de-sac. Where are you going so fast? There’s no way out. Also if you go the other direction, there’s a stop sign. Where are you going?

Jennifer Gibbs 1 year ago

I’m that mom. i yell at cars. course, i have a reason.
my son was hit by a car walking to school at that intersection. it was cold that day and snow was on the ground and they were just coming back from winter break. the woman who hit him goes through that intersection every single morning because her daughter is in the same grade as my son. she blows through that intersection every single morning.
so i yell a lot…

Eliana Loomer 1 year ago

So glad to know I’m not the only one.

Leslie Tidwell 1 year ago

Can the congregation say “Amen”! And I purposefully drive slower when we’re late (lost shoe, blanket, tantrum, etc). Lots of deep breathing and not watching the clock.

Jenny Holmes 1 year ago

When I did home daycare, this drove me insane. We would have to walk to the school bus stop and I was always scared some asshole would come flying around the corner and hurt one of my kids.

Sarah Samson D’Amato 1 year ago

7 and 8 and they can’t go to a neighbors house unless you’re helicoptering above them? Wow.

Erin Getting 1 year ago

Take video of it.

Kelly Smith Trail 1 year ago

Super soakers are great tools for slowing people down. Water balloons are for repeat offenders

Shannon McIlvain 1 year ago

Are we neighbors? This happens here too. There is no reason to drive this packed city street like it is a nascar race.

Regina Brookman 1 year ago

A friend if mine got so sick of it by her house that a couple bags of quick cement “fell off” her truck right before it rained. Instant speed bumps

Holly Hutchins 1 year ago

I used to live in a trailer park where idiots did this…as a large woman…I would purposely walk out in front of them as they got close. Been cussed a lot, but hey…..it worked. Don’t recommend this tactic though.

Stephanie Stork 1 year ago

I can’t tell you how many times my neighbor and I have done this. Glad I’m not the only “crazy lady” out there.

Erin Getting 1 year ago

Be careful – if he’s a crazy driver, you truly don’t know how he will react.

April Sumner 1 year ago

Yes people should not speed down residential streets but as parents we have to be defensive. So I try to keep my kids out of the street as much as possible and I taught them to be on the lookout for cars when in the street and to move when they see them out of the way. We can only control our own actions. When they were really little I did not let them near the street period.

FixTheToaster 1 year ago

Thank you for posting this.
Car crashes are the #1 cause of death to kids.
Our neighborhoods are unsafe for the kids to play due to speeders. We as moms need to lead this campaign for change. Most crashes are preventable.

I suggest holding a neighborhood meeting.
Order signs from Keep Kids Alive Drive 25 and out them up.

Thanks agai for posting this. It’s a topic that goes unmentioned yet is a global epidemic.

Kacey Martino 1 year ago

Slow down in parking lots too people!! That’s where I’m usually yelling at someone.

Alisa 1 year ago

First, Love your name! I am also that mom. Actually just yelled at someone to slow down this morning while walking my children to school and they were speeding on the road right in front of the school. I’ve always yelled at fast drivers since having children 10 years ago and honestly I’ve never heard another parent yell. I’m going to keep on keeping on because it is for my children and yours!

Tanya Long 1 year ago

I do this frequently. Even through our parking lot of our complexes too!!!

Lisa 1 year ago

I would be interesting to see how that turns out if you cause a major wreck. Yes he was going faster than he should. Yes, I threw XYZ in the road and he swerved to miss it hitting a child. Arrest him for speeding officer. Ummm…how can I? You threw something out to mess him up on purpose. Please put your hands behind your back Mrs. _____. I’m arresting you for endangering the welfare of a minor. Sir, you will get a ticket for speeding though. Just remember, by throwing things, you can be putting your children in great danger. That car speeding down the road might just swerve in your yard and hit you or your kids.

Patty Leming 1 year ago

I’m the same way…I’m constantly yelling at the people flying down my quiet little suburban street. There are nine children on my tiny block including my four year old who loves to play in my front yard. Go ahead and think I’m crazy, or approach me…I will not apologize for trying to keep our children safe!

Andrea Kelly Briggeman 1 year ago

My street is actually an alley(such a long story, sigh) and is quite narrow. For 2 cars to pass each other it means going off the paved part and onto the tiny shoulder on either side. There is a speed limit sign posted of 30 km/h. Our little street is only about 200m long(only 5 houses). People scream down like it’s the front straightaway at Daytona Speedway. It’s insane. They blow through the stop sign at the end. I won’t allow my kids to play in the front yard because of it. My mom(who’s house would be run into if anyone decided to just keep going straight through the stop sign rather than turning) and I yell at EVERYONE who is speeding or blowing the stop sign. I’ve considered throwing eggs, but I think I may try the ball. There’s one lady in particular I’d love to get, she’s always on her cell phone.

Sheila Lowe 1 year ago

I love it! I am so glad to know that I am not the only one who will walk into the street to yell at the people who speed down the street.

Lindsey Barfield 1 year ago

Hose. Use the hose and spray the car. Whoops.

Cassie N Roberts-Beineke 1 year ago

Love your writing!!! I scream & throw things at those particular drivers.
Drivers who who breeze through crosswalks without a care also get me fired up. Sweet Jesus don’t get momma bear fired up.

Alaina Simon Jessome 1 year ago

This is so me!!!! And you’re not going to make me stop yelling until you slow down :)

Mike 1 year ago

I’m the dad who has gone so far as to walk in front of the car and confront them. I have also followed neighbors home and knocked on their doors.

Ashley Stevens 1 year ago

I do this on a regular basis.

Michele Reid 1 year ago

My pet peeve as well. It is posted 40 on my street and the lowest I’ve seen anyone do was 44. (there was this sign that flashed the passing cars speed) I’m disgusted at these assholes. Everyday, especially at rush hour. My street is a though street. It is the only one that goes right under the Allen. People use it as a short cut and they don’t give a rats ass about the law or the safety of fellow humans. I’ve raised my hands and yelled at them. Clearly, that doesn’t work in the West end of Toronto. Something needs to be done and I for one would like to throat punch every single dickhead that speeds up and down this street.

Elizabeth McCosky 1 year ago

Yep me too, also always drive extra slow if the jerks a few house up are behind us. You would think a ER doctor and nurse would know better than to go 40+mph on a dead end street full of little kids.

Danielle Russell 1 year ago

I have done, the exact same things, in out neighborhood….I don’t care what people think, I don’t want children hurt. Period.

Lori Welter Bour 1 year ago

I do the very same thing….good for you!!!! People shouldn’t have to learn the HARD WAY about slowing down like this but unfortunately they do and a young child is laid to rest because of careless behavior of drivers with a mission to get to somewhere, and FAST!! Please slow down and THINK about the consequences of your actions.

Kimberly Laughter Kelley 1 year ago

Makes me NUTS ! What is so important that you are driving like your heads on fire ? I actually told this to one of my neighbors one time . Grrr. !

Kathy Kulan Levins 1 year ago

Ha ha, my son yells “slow down” to the cars now too!! Thanks, Catherine Levins for letting me know I’m not the only crazy momma bear.

Lisa @ Grandma’s Briefs 1 year ago

A crazy lady with a cause deserves kudos! Great job, Mommy. If all the talkers would get out and align with you, there’d be no need for wacky arm waving… and the streets (ie, the kids) would be much safer.

Good luck being on BTS duty.

Michelle 1 year ago

I love you for this. I do it too, and I learned it from my own mom. She lives in town so sometimes we yell at my speeding neighbors together!

Katie Scullion Weeks 1 year ago

This is me.

MamaB 1 year ago

We also live on a super busy street everyone speeds on and, yes, the police and emergency services vehicles are the fastest – and understandably so, as they’re trying to save lives, but they’re also the most dangerous because children are drawn to lights and sirens like moths to flame. But I’m sitting here thinking, “We can’t seriously be the ONLY responsible parents who noticed this trend and chose to protect our kids by keeping them away from the road.” We immediately fenced in our yard (by ourselves, in an afternoon – and it’s not tiny) when we moved here to ensure our children and dogs couldn’t put themselves in harm’s way. It costs very little to put up a secure, sturdy fence if safety is your priority rather than aesthetics (if not, you may need to examine your priorities). Is it so hard to believe that every stranger in the world doesn’t love your kids – whom they don’t even know – just because you do? Is it so difficult to understand that you, as the parent, are the one ultimately responsible for your children’s safety? If everyone is so worried about their kids’ safety, why aren’t they keeping them in the security of a fenced-in yard, an enclosed porch, or taking them to a fenced-in park/playground (the latter two we did when we lived in our old house on an equally busy road and couldn’t afford to fence the yard because we were poor college kids)? Our culture’s propensity for blame-shifting, responsibilty avoidance, and litigation never ceases to astound. My husband and I would rather take responsibility for the lives we chose to bring into the world than be victims of some horrible tragedy. None of those drivers made you have kids, live on that street, or let your children play near the road with no barrier or protection. You made those decisions; own them and either rectify them or accept the consequences. You can’t expect the world to shift on its axis to accommodate your life choices; you need to adapt to the reality of your environment. Survival of the fittest…

AprilWilliam Garard 1 year ago

Oh this is so me!!! I do this anywhere too.. At home, at the park, in a parking lot…. Anywhere there are children, my own or not…. If you are going too fast, you are going to hear it from this crazy lady!

Mindi McCarthy 1 year ago

The speed limit is 25 on our street, but people FLY. I asked for the sign and was denied. So I took a video one day and showed it at the police station. A week later one of those digital speeding traps showed up on the street. It has a camera and people get a ticket in the mail with a picture of them and how fast they were going.

Laurie 1 year ago

My husband likes to “teach people a lesson” when he’s out driving. So if I person pulls out into traffic and (heaven forbid) he has to SLOW DOWN he’ll get right up on their ass and stay on them for a while. I’ve tried to tell him that this doesn’t work, that more than likely they didn’t even notice what he’s doing but he still does it. He’s gotten better about it since I get on him when he does it when the kids are in the car (what if someone has a gun and one day gets pissed at him??) so I will NOT be telling him about the woman who thanked you for calling her out! I can just see the conversation now, “SEE?? It does work!!”

me 1 year ago

so true! the other day I saw a family walking in the middle of the road. teaching their daughter to bigwheel down the center. really? we should teach a child that is where to ride their bike? she was waaay ahead of the parents with a stroller. if a car came around the corner who expects a small child in the middle of your lane?

Lori Miller Zamora 1 year ago

I have to admit I have done this too. I even cut in front of people going down the main street of my neighborhood when I see them coming up behind me too fast. Then they pass me and look at me like wth? Then I yell out the window slow down! It embarrasses the heck out of my kids but….wth!?

Corey Dana Wade 1 year ago

We had the signage. Called police on a particular resident. Police told us nothing they could do unless they catch her or she hits a child and then told us that it children should not be in the street at all, it’s not a playground and we should not complain. The neighborhood was all kids.No sidewalks. We always were it with them. But we had no rights. We would roll balls out when she flew by. She finally moved.

me 1 year ago

I keep getting yelled at in my neighborhood for driving 20 mph! some people speed- not everyone driving past your child is trying to kill them though. lol. getting yelled at for 20 did make me want to speed up, but I haven’t.

Tiffany Prain Cates 1 year ago

This was me this weekend!

Nicole Domenech Eddings 1 year ago

Love this!!!!!!

Sarcastaspen 1 year ago

Yes, yes and yes. I’m that mom too! I’ve even thrown the rotten figs off the tree. Or been known to toss a nerf ball in the street to give them a bit of a scare.

Bridgett Sztanyo 1 year ago

Amen sister!

Sylia Abadi-Aboudi 1 year ago

Can’t really do that in Brooklyn, NY. My two year old already knows not to go beyond the confines of our yard, and I am constantly on the watch. You can’t control how people drive, you can control how responsible your children are.

Mary 1 year ago

Way to go, Mama!
Drives me nuts too. We had a kit get hit in front of the high school this year. Thankfully she wasn’t badly injured, but I hope it got people to realize that whatever appointment they’re headed to after grabbing their latte and pastry from Dunkin can wait the 2 goddamn minutes it takes to drive a bit slower through a school zone and not be a jerk driver. It’s amazing to me that our middle and high school’s parking lots and drop offs are so poorly organized. It’s like a giant game of Frogger at both.

Don’t even get me started about how the idiots drive on my (rural!) road. I’ve had people blast past my house doing 60mph, and I’m less than a city block from a T intersection. There are times I wonder how they make the turn. I’m actually glad the town just came and took the little bridge out- now they HAVE to slow the hell down and stop.

Crystal F Engelmann-Starns 1 year ago

I am the screamer on my street,the park across the streets signs saying children playing,does not deter, so I am the screamer on my street!

Heather Adams 1 year ago

I can’t even explain how much happiness this article brought me. I thought I was the only crazy lady outside yelling at cars to slow down!

JoAnna Constantino 1 year ago

Love this. Can we get someone to yell at speeders in parking lots too??

Sarah McGibbon 1 year ago

I LOVE THIS!!! ❤️

Amie Wheeler 1 year ago

Nobody drives faster than a mom late for school. They are the stink eye givers and the worst offenders.

Tamara 1 year ago

A neighbourhood near mine is now covered with pink ribbons tied on trees with signs on most lawns saying “slow down, children at play” because a driver was going too fast and killed a young girl crossing the street by her house. Keep screaming away at those drivers! A mom’s gotta do what a mom’s gotta do.

http://twitter.com/MarkCarcGlobal/status/491329202302382081/photo/1

Annamaria-Guarneri Mckean 1 year ago

Teens and old ladies speeding, called cops..they did a survey for a speed bump..guess what?? Old ladies and teens denied the need. Wow. No speed bump I’m still yelling.

Chrissie Quez 1 year ago

Me too! And it’s true. I also scream at cars, watch kids, n they aren’t even mine! There are so many kids on my block now it scares me when the cars
Are going so fast :/

Trish Kingsford 1 year ago

I love the satisfying crunch of people hitting our speed hump too fast. It’s in a playground zone and has some serious battle damage. I admit watching gleefully when someone drinking a coffee is headed towards it, or too busy with a finger jammed up there nose to bother slowing down!!!

So may comments here I agree with. Residential speed limits should be limited to 40kmh.

Christine Zulski Parsch 1 year ago

I have stopped numerous drivers on our court because they are driving too fast. There are more than 10 small kids on our street & it drives me INSANE when I see people flying down our road. Fortunately all have been somewhat kind when I simply ask them to slow down. For now at least…

Sarah Samson D’Amato 1 year ago

They shouldn’t have to slow down. We should be watching our children, right? (yes, this is sarcasm)

Sarah Fritz-Maldonado 1 year ago

They sell signs at toysrus I have neighbors that bought a ton and put them up when the kids are playing and people see it slowing down thinking it’s a town thing before they realize it’s a bought sign… I live 1 block from a school but people still speed

Robin Dickey 1 year ago

We live down the street from a jeep plant, ever since it went up my mom was yelling at people to slow down, I picked that up from her at a young age and now I live in the same house with my kids.. I yell at them still the same way “slow down asshole!” They don’t like me much but I don’t care! I’ve witnessed puppies get hit and my neighbor when he was just a boy.. the city refuses to put speed bumps in, they say there’s not enough traffic, but they don’t monitor it when that place is letting out or filling in… now we have new neighbors with even smaller kids (that they barely watch) and it sickens me all together..

Megan Wylie Potts 1 year ago

This is me, also. Crazy woman yelling and shaking my fist as cars drive by my house :) My 2yr old says, “that car is going toooo fast, mommy” I am such a proud mom!

Sarah Engle 1 year ago

When my kids want to ride their bikes i block the end of the driveway with my truck and i have a sign that looks like a wet floor sign but says “slow.. kids at play” that goes on the other side of my truck closest to the road. but i still yell at those driving by too fast especially if that bright florescent yellow sign is out! The speed limit is 25 and the block is only about 4 or five houses long. Why do ppl feel the need to do 50 mph down that short of a rd?? Ugh. Infuriating!!

Suzanne Hodell Popielec 1 year ago

An empty baby stroller in the middle of the street with the hood pulled up and a blanket bundled in it works a charm. Of course, once they realized there is no baby, they DO get pissed. They can kiss my ass…I left enough room to drive around it on BOTH sides.

Michelle Taylor 1 year ago

I have neighbors that drive their 4 wheelers and dirt bikes like speed demons down my road. The first time I was super nice and asked them to please slow down because my kiddos are awful little and we wouldn’t want an accident. The 34 year old son retorted with some rather “colorful” language. So now I just scream at them and call police dispatch, cause those aren’t street legal anyways. Makes me giggle everytime the cops show up and give them a ticket. Don’t mess with a Scary Mommy! :)

Chantelle Lafrenière-Reid 1 year ago

Yep, happens in my neighborhood too. We live across from a park where the speed limit is 30 but I swear sometimes its a racetrack. One day….someone will live with regret for the rest of their lives. Until then, I too look like a nutcase, yelling at speed demons. Maybe I’ll take a play from the book of my 90 yr old neighbor and spray racing offenders with my garden hose. Someone should give that man a community award.

Allie Labelle 1 year ago

i had this same problem in my old neighborhood. until one day my husband stood in the road with a crowbar while the worst offender came speeding up the street. the guy always went slow after that fun day. we also lived beside a school.

Christina McDowell Parks 1 year ago

Amen! I thought my husband was going to punch a teenager on Halloween one year for speeding past the trick or treaters.

Tela G. Thomason 1 year ago

Good for YOU!! I’ve done that too! Oh, and you would think it’s an act of God to get speed bumps installed by the city or county – and that hardly does *any thing* to slow the bastards down!!

Jennifer Stershic 1 year ago

applause!

debbie 1 year ago

reminds me of the episode in Modern Family with Claire chasing the streets for those idiots too.

Good on you!

Mindi 1 year ago

While I agree there are A LOT of asshole drivers out there, I absolutely do not agree that the street, residential or otherwise is a place for kids to run freely. In my neighborhood the kids have no regard for cars at all. In fact they feel entitled to be in the middle of the street and they do not move even when a car is coming. It is ridiculous, I understand that occasionally a ball or toy might find its way to the street, but kids of any age should not be playing near the road. People do not pay attention when they drive, they do drive too fast, and they are careless. I am not saying these behaviors are okay, but one idiot driver could end your child’s life. So instead of screaming at the driver, teach your kids to practice good judgment and play in an area that does not put them in immediate danger

Beth Ranson Conrad 1 year ago

Amen, sister. Scream on.

Sharon 1 year ago

I want to keep a supply of water balloons on hand. I bet it was super satisfying.

Stephanie Protsman 1 year ago

While I get angry at the cars that speed by in residential areas. Your kids have a back yard! Use it! I’m tired of playing Frogger In my own neighborhood. Kids playing in streets, swinging down from the tree, and running across streets for fun. If my kids 7,5, & 3 want to play; they go in our fenced in yard. Just wish others would do the same too!

Eileen Franz Brandy 1 year ago

We live in a townhouse community that only has one entrance/exit & people still go flying through our neighborhood.

Angela Miller 1 year ago

As a mother now I am hyper vigilant about kids in the roads. As a child I had a cousin hit and killed while waiting for the bus.

Marci Millington Lary 1 year ago

sounds exactly like me. Same problem in our neighborhood.

Sharon 1 year ago

Argh, I know this feel. Within two blocks of my new house, there is a daycare, a library, and the town park (with new splash pad). I have embraced my role as foul-mouthed gendarme/crazy woman. My hormones extend way beyond caring for the safety of my 9 month old son to covering the children of town. And I’m OK with it.

Christina Rice Carson 1 year ago

I have many times yelled at those who speed and run stop signs by my house. That being said the other problem that goes along with it is those same parents are not teaching their kids that if you are riding your bike, scooter, ect. On the street they need to obey traffic laws as well. They need to stop at stop signs and ride on the correct side of the street and not all over it. I learned this when a 10 year old screamed the f word at me because i proceeded straight through well under the 25 speed limit and they thought that they didn’t need to stop because they were kids and not in a car. Needless to say i stopped in the middle of the street and informed them same as i would have anyone else. The lazy parents who dont stop are teaching their kids that it is ok to do the same thing through their actions. One day what the patents think is just a little thing will be someones life.

Liz 1 year ago

We have traffic cones that were generously given to us by some town workers who got a kick out of my kids watching them. When out kids are outside playing we put the cones out at a couple key points (blind corner people whip around and in front of the house, we leave more than enough room for cars etc to pass but it helps most people pause a bit.

Claudine Cina 1 year ago

I have taken the orange work triangles and placed them directly in the middle of the road in front of my house to fake a pot hole. And when I asked the village for a Slow Children sign they said, sorry that costs big money! Since when do we put a price tag on children?

Liz 1 year ago

I live on a corner lot, my entire yard is on a street and people fly down both, the backyard is not an option.

Jane R Clukey 1 year ago

I think they recalled seeing a police crusier at dads house a time or two. They were scared, I would call the police…in which I did :) Brittany Gallant

Kirsten Bayly-Parker 1 year ago

I totally agree with you with the speeding. However in our apartment block the kids are sent to play in the car park. You turn in really slowly on a blind corner and a child cycles/runs/plays football in front of you. No supervision and there is a public park across the road. But hey the parents would have to go with them.

Erica Barry Sabinske 1 year ago

I do this all the time walking to/from the bus stop.

Jane R Clukey 1 year ago

Yes and scared my kids to death, didn’t know I had it in me tell someone off, turns out if you put my kids in danger I can turn into a scary women. I literally remember one of the guys muffled, a sorry. LOL Brittany Gallant

Stephanie Walker Ray 1 year ago

That was me in our old neighborhood. People used our street as a cut thru. We even had cars end up in front yards because they were going too fast, did they ever slow down? No!

Faith Thompson 1 year ago

This is me. From my porch.

Karen Phillips 1 year ago

I am also this mom that yells at cars to slow down on our street.

Niamh Flynn-Dunne 1 year ago

I totally agree and I am prone to yelling at people to get off the phone too! However, I am horrified at how many parents let their toddlers play on the street without supervision. Two and three year olds with no adult or even older kids present.

Laura Wilson Antonelli 1 year ago

Kim Tilly, nothing says taking your life in your hands like trying to leave a church parking lot on CCD night…….omg……I shiver just thinking about it starting back up in another few weeks…….awful!!

Mary Ittak 1 year ago

I agree traffic laws should be followed, but children should also be taught not to play in the street. I have had kids intentionally block the road and yell at me for trying to drive through when I pick my son up after work.

Kelli Back 1 year ago

We move our cars into the street. One on each side but next to each other. This makes our street a one lane road. Hahahah.

Jackie Perras Johnson 1 year ago

it’s no joke, my daughter was hit by a car in a school zone by a woman that didn’t stop at a stop sign. People are in a rush and don’t pay enough attention.

Michelle Petrano Logan 1 year ago

There is a special place in Hell for people who speed down residential streets. I absolutely hate them.

Sarah 1 year ago

Here in the UK where not everyone has a car, we still have the same drivers! Do you think it’s an international thing, some disease that all catch once they get behind the wheel? Today we had a massive storm and I was taking my Oldest One to summer camp, walking (we don’t have a car) and I’m also pushing a stroller. Walking down a hill, making sure to stay away from the kerb where the puddles are. Because puddle drench is a favourite game here. Especially on pedestrians that push a buggy. Normal rational sane people become rain demons the moment the skies open. So in a hand stretched out moment to international relations, I salute you. Because I too shout at drivers for all sorts of reasons.

Lisa Allen 1 year ago

I used to live on the same street as a deputy Sheriff. A guy was literally racing through the neighborhood in his hot, fast car. Next time he came down our street, the Sheriff was waiting with his gun locked and loaded. He took him downtown and booked him for all kinds of charges.

Amy Rever-Oberle 1 year ago

A bunch of the homes in the neighborhood near my daughter’s day care have yellow signs out near the curb that say “Slow Down. Children Live Here.”

Brett Morris 1 year ago

I used to do this all the time when my kids were little! One of my neighbors (16 at the time) jumped out of his car and confronted me, really? And we lived on a culdesac.

John Bowers 1 year ago

We also have this problem on our street in Ohio. Although we recently moved to this neighborhood, our street has NO SIDEWALKS so the kids have NO CHOICE but to ride their scooter and roller blades on the side of the street.
I have, to the point of nausea, called the local PD and begged them weekly to patrol and cite those who break the law. The police started targeting US as we drove around town b/c time and time again we call and ask for a patrol car. Seems they have too many OTHER important things to do and we just have to deal with it until a child gets injured.

Amber Means 1 year ago

I am this Mom too. Absolutely no reason to driving that fast on a residential street. The worst offender on our street is a Dad in his Dodge Caravan full of kids!

Megan Meister 1 year ago

We’re on a direct route to the local elementary school. It’s the drop off/pick up parents that are the main offenders. I won’t even go get our mail from the street side mailbox at 3 o’clock for fear of getting mowed down by the idiot parents whose agenda is more important than anything else. I’m seriously considering lobbying for a speedbump.

Ginger Gendreau 1 year ago

<3

Aerin Gunn 1 year ago

We live in a neighborhood with tight streets and the stop sign on the corner is treated like a suggestion by almost everyone, neighborhood parents included. I put a bright orange, reflective “CHILDREN AT PLAY” sign in the street about six inches from my driveway. It helps. But I’m totally shocked at how little people seem to care. DRIVE LIKE YOUR KIDS PLAY HERE BECAUSE OURS (and probably yours) DO!

Jessica Hinz 1 year ago

I do the same thing. I had a guy turning into my neighborhood, while I was coming up to the stop sign, completely cut into my lane and damn near hit me with my kid in the backseat. I know where the guy lives BC he lives in my neighborhood. I will be having a discussion with him this evening when I get home from work.

Just bc you don’t value your own car and life does not mean you have the right to put me and my child at risk.

Emily Parker 1 year ago

Our mail lady drives way to fast down our Dirt road! She almost hit my friends kid on day, has been turned in before and still won’t slow down!

Kimberly Russo 1 year ago

Ahh …the worst ones in my neighborhood are the MOMS! Texting and driving 35 or higher into our own neighborhood.

Reckless and selfish twats

Bonnie Leary 1 year ago

I had one of these moms on my street when I was a teenager, she always screamed at me! Of course, I deserved it, I was a maniac teen.

Kim Tilly 1 year ago

I’m 2 houses away from a Catholic Church. CCD nights are the worst.

Vera DiMartino Whittler 1 year ago

I love this! In my neighborhood. People seem to ignore all stop signs and speed limits. Everyone is in a hurry or not paying attention.

Tricia Lkb 1 year ago

Go ahead, hate me. I am this woman too.

Mary Panstingel 1 year ago

I’ve had this problem, even living at the end of the street. My husband & I have argued over the need to play in the front year v/s the back (my preference). Sadly, one of the worst offenders is the mother of one of the neighbor kids. I stand out there like a hawk if my kids are in the front yard. The other parents seem to think I’m overreacting.

Christi Poor 1 year ago

I tried to confront a lady picking up her child from a daycare in my neighborhood because she ran a stop sign on a road that has about 20 kids that live within a block from it. She wouldn’t get out if her van. I was heated!!!

Anonymous 1 year ago

This is a coincidence. Lol. I threw a plastic cup the other night at somebody speeding down the street. Ha

Jessica Mullins 1 year ago

This. I love this. It pisses me off to no end when people fly down residential streets where kids are playing everywhere. Makes me so so mad. I yell and use obscene hand gestures for people that do this.

Rose Tuzzolino 1 year ago

I yell at assholes speeding down our street…some of the snotty teens use it as a drag strip. At our last neighborhood meeting I made it clear that paintballs will be deployed at all drivers speeding. Our neighborhood officer thinks that is a delightful way for him to issue tickets. I have yet to use the paintballs but often find my husband and myself yelling at the assholes weekly.

Emily Kuhn 1 year ago

My 3 yr old now yells at the cars for us :)

Krista Yeasley Garcia 1 year ago

It’s insane the way people drive. Especially residential streets. We live right around the corner from the police station, courthouse, and fire station, do you think that would have any impact on how you drive around here? Nope!!! It’s crazy!

Kristy Hertzog 1 year ago

I’m that mom in my neighborhood too.

Holly Ribarchik Ferry 1 year ago

We actually put cones in the middle of our street when the kids are out playing. Forces them to slow down to go around them.

Laura Lukasik Pipitone 1 year ago

The other day, my 4 year old screamed “SLOW DOWN DUDE” to a Forester flying down our residential street. Frankly, I’m surprised he didn’t say “asshole”.

Charlene Popow 1 year ago

Or…. We could make the kids play in the backyard? Less stress. Mine are not permitted to play in the front of the house.

Danielle Chandler 1 year ago

Been there, done that!

Jessica Duvall Wodarczyk 1 year ago

I am so that mom…those speeders are such assholes only thinking of themselves

Tonya Meligan 1 year ago

I live on a heavily child populated street with a school at the end of the block, and even emergency services (emts,fire, and police) all FLY down our street like it’s a drag strip. I used to get bent out of shape about the way people drive down our street. Now I just keep the kids I’m responsible for in the backyard

Kelly Dillon 1 year ago

My dad taught me an evil trick. Just roll a ball out into the street just before they come. Scares the shit out of them and usually it only takes once. And my kids get a cool new ball

Brianna Starr Plants 1 year ago

I love this!! I am her! My house is kid central in my neighbor hood. 8-10 kids everyday. Riding their bikes, playing kick ball, baseball and anything else they can think of. And assholes seem to think the 25mph sign is a suggestion!! So I am that crazy lady yelling at people flying down our road. I plan on making a sign to put in my yard that reads…… Speed limit, 25. Hit my kid because you are speeding, you won’t need a lawyer!!

Catherine Root Sibuma 1 year ago

Seriously. I live on a street where there is a school and you would *think* parents driving their kids to school would be aware that kids live on our street. Guess who are the worst offenders for speeding, just take a good guess. It’s the parents. I get it. You were late because milk spilled, your child wouldn’t get out bed, you had to deal with 54 tantrums, and you are late for work and have a very, very important meeting. I get it, I do. But if you speed down my street, I hate your guts for endangering my kids. Period. Slow the fuck down. It’s not life or death.

Jill Rogers 1 year ago

I have done this….. :)

Tanya Froio Leonard 1 year ago

I am that mom in my shared drive way. I have a 9,6,2 and 1 yr old. And a dog and at any given time someone can step off our back steps into the driveway. Now I have taught the kids to look but you know kids. So I have said more than once this a driveway not a highway. And if you hit one of my kids it’s not the police you should be worried about.

Meghan 1 year ago

You should get one of the lawn signs that read “Drive Like Your Kid Lives Here”—- super effective shaming tool for too fast drivers :)

Lorie Spiegel Bratetich 1 year ago

Been there, done that :)

Marisa Strakes Webster 1 year ago

I’ve thought about tossing a ball or a dummy…hehehe

Jennifer Zapf 1 year ago

you are me, and I am you, and we see the same crazy middle aged women in cross over vehicles that are heavy and don’t stop nearly as quickly as they think they do. Oddly in my neighborhood of Minoa NY it is the local village judge whose husband is the speeder, It IS NOT the teenage boys, it is older men and women who quite frankly should move the F** out of the neighborhood now that they are empty nesters, and if they aren’t going to move, they should at least give the respect their generation claims is so lacking in the younger generation

Marisa Strakes Webster 1 year ago

This is so me:)

Jennifer Lee 1 year ago

Me too. I fling things!

Terri JS Molitor 1 year ago

It’s like this was written by someone in my neighborhood!

Sue Yaker Frager 1 year ago

I can totally relate. They use my block to bypass the lights and they drove down the street way to fast with the regard to the kids.

Laura Frotten-Richerson 1 year ago

Im that mom…