Spring Break With Kids vs. College Spring Break

by JD Bailey
Originally Published: 

It’s Spring Break time. Fifteen years ago, that phrase was magical. Florida, sunshine, partying, cute boys…

Now? Now it means my kids aren’t in school. Which means I still want to drink copious amounts of alcohol throughout the week. But for very different reasons.

But cheer up, my friends in similar boats! There are some amazing similarities between college spring break and spring break as a parent of young, school-aged children…

1. Scantily clad girls are running around unchecked, giggling and screaming.

2. There are grumpy grown-up residents yelling at the kids to behave.

3. There is a risk of finding a unidentifiable substance in your shoes sometime during the week.

4. Your sleeping arrangements for the night are always unknown and could be any of the following:

• Sharing a bed with another female who snores and hogs the covers.

• Sharing a bed with a guy who wants to get in your pants. • Sleeping on the floor because you didn’t play your cards right at bedtime.

5. At 2 a.m. you might be woken up by a request to assist someone in the bathroom because her tummy hurts.

6. Your roommates are always wearing your clothes without asking.

7. You’re really, really tired because loud, inconsiderate people won’t let you sleep.

8. Every single friggin’ day, there’s a girl crying about something at some point.

9. You’re not sure the last time the sheets on the bed were changed, but you’re too tired to care.

10. There’s a yucky smell emanating from somewhere in the room and no one can figure out what it is, where it’s coming from, or whose fault it is.

11. You keep finding people’s underwear in strange places and you don’t want to know how it got there.

12. You could go to bed with one person and wake up with a different one. Or two.

See? Key West 1997 and Suburban New England 2015. Not so different after all.

Related post: For Every Mom Stuck Home With Kids Over Spring Break

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