If you’ve tried any of the dating sites out there, haven’t had any luck, and gave your phone the middle finger a bunch of times, there is another option for singles out there.
I recently heard about Taffy, a fairly new dating app that makes you jump through a few hoops before you get see who you are talking with. Does it sound scary? Intriguing? The wrong kind of right that sends you running for the hills? Maybe all of the above?
I know, I’m kind of confused about my feelings, too.
The idea behind Taffy is that you get to know someone before you see what they look like. Their motto is “Type before you swipe.”
First, you build a profile and you do include a picture, but it is blurred out. Next, you start to chat with people who share common interests, are in your area, and with your specified age category. You are able to see their posts to get a feel for the vibe they putting out there, which can be huge in deciding if you want to take things further by chatting.
Then, the magic happens. According to Taffy, “The more you chat the more you see.”
Little by little, with each exchange, your photos come into focus, and you get to have a gander at who you’ve been chatting with.
Obviously, there are pros and cons to this type of online dating platform. While it is nice to connect with someone on an emotional level, physical attraction is huge — no one can deny that. And if you’ve spent days or weeks talking with someone, only to see their picture and realize they aren’t your type, that can be a let down for both of you.
On the other hand, a lot of us can’t really tell if there’s going to be chemistry by just seeing a picture — I know I certainly can’t. Some of the men I’ve been the most attracted to in my life have been the unexpected ones — the men I wouldn’t necessarily pick out of a crowd. I’ve developed an attraction to them over time by getting to know them and the attraction was based on their personality, beliefs, and life goals.
Founder John Schenk said he created the app because “it’s personality that helps’ close the deal,’ when it comes to making authentic connections.” We have to admit, that’s true.
He also felt we now live in a society that doesn’t talk anymore, and thought back to the days of chat rooms when you would talk without being able to see who you were talking to. “Having a conversation incognito was fascinating,” he says. “And if you weren’t physically attracted to him/her, the worst-case outcome was you’d just made a new friend or pen pal.”
Or, let’s be real, you would just ghost them.
We all know attraction is a big part in dating, but does attraction only depend on physical appearance? And have other dating apps perhaps emphasized physical appearance too much? I’m starting to wonder.
Taffy makes you message back and forth about 10 about times before a full picture is revealed, but Schenk said in an article for Mashable, “the app’s algorithm will eventually take the quality of conversation into account when deciding how fast to reveal your match.”
Whether Taffy is a new idea, or an old idea that’s new again, when I first heard about this, it scared the hell out of me. But after learning more, this dating app definitely has my attention.
Lord knows I’ve talked to a lot of women who were physically attracted to someone they met online, or in real life, and got to know them only to find they had absolute nothing in common. And how many times have you meant someone and, though you weren’t physically attracted to them at first glance, after talking and spending a little time with them, you couldn’t stop thinking about them? Those seem to be the connections that stick, after all.
Okay, so deep breath, maybe this isn’t so scary after all.