Trump Talks To Trick-Or-Treaters About Their Weight Because Of Course He Did

The President bungles White House’s Halloween with bizarre comment about little girl’s weight

Proving there’s nothing he can’t make cringe-worthy, President Trump raised eyebrows yesterday with an inexplicable comment to a little girl while handing out candy to Oval Office trick-or-treaters.

I thought kids were supposed to be the monsters on Halloween?

This Tuesday is Halloween, and because it falls on a weekday, a lot of the associated festivities are taking place this weekend. Yesterday, the White House welcomed some trick-or-treaters – young sons and daughters of members of the White House Press Corps – into the Oval Office.

The president handed out some treats, but he couldn’t resist a few icky tricks as well.

Some of it was easy to anticipate. Like the insults he threw at the childrens’ parents.

“I cannot believe the media produced such beautiful children,” Trump blurted upon welcoming the kids. Gee, thanks?

Of course, why wouldn’t the president of the United States express surprise that the offspring of his hated media are good-looking? To him, the press are the greatest monsters of all.

But singling out a little girl for some candy-based body shaming?

“You have no weight problems. That’s the good news. Right?” Wrong. There’s no good news anymore.

Okay, that wasn’t that hard to anticipate either. After all, this is a guy who has been accused of sexual harassment by dozens of women and has repeatedly made lewd comments about his own daughter.

The President carried on by asking the kids if they were going to follow in their parents’ footsteps, and then stopped himself before he got in trouble. Except trouble is his natural habitat.

“So how does the press treat you? I bet you get treated better by the press than anybody in the world,” he continued, apparently asking some tiny witches.

Hopefully, the girls answered with a resounding yes, knowing we’d probably be better off with actual witches running the country.

Being president isn’t an easy job, but there are some aspects of it for which the only qualification is to be a normal, decent, human being. Unfortunately for our country, President Trump can’t even manage that.

Some of the more basic presidential duties most of us could probably handle without undue incident: Offer condolences to a war widow; apologize for saying the wrong thing; deflect praise; be modest; say “Happy Halloween, I love your costume!”

But no. Instead, he tells that war widow her husband “knew what he signed up for.” Then he accuses her of lying. He repeatedly praises FoxNews for praising him, brags about (false) crowd sizes and standing ovations, politicizes a Boy Scouts convention, insults the parents of the children visiting the White House and makes a bizarre comment about a child’s weight.

Stranger Things may have only just come back, but we’ve been living in the Upside Down since last November. Only our version is a lot scarier.