We all hope to find a person who laughs at our jokes, who can make us laugh in return. We want someone tall and thin and charming. We have high expectations, and are disappointed when reality doesn’t live up to our fantasy of the “perfect person.”
Compromise isn’t quite as sexy as perfection, but it’s real. Relationships are about finding a person whose good outweighs the bad. (Bonus points if that person is willing to give you massages on a regular basis.)
Luckily, the hilarious people of Twitter understand relationships all too well:
It all starts with a few dates, and assessing what they think of you:
What my girlfriend thought, first 4 dates:
1. Nice shirt.
2. Wow. A second nice shirt.
3. Okay, first shirt again.
4. He has two shirts.
— Ristolable (@ristolable) August 13, 2014
And what you think of them:
Dating is collecting information about someone until you realize you don't like them
— AmberTozer (@AmberTozer) September 17, 2013
And feeling a ridiculous amount of pressure to figure it out ASAP:
Which is tricky because sometimes you can miss the red flags:
He doesn't text back.
He breaks promises.
He doesn't instigate conversation or check on you.
He only messages when he needs something.
— Tolly (@tolly_t) September 24, 2017
After all, some flags are pretty obvious:
“Why you ain’t text me back”
First of all experiment 623 you’re not my man, relax.
— moodymami (@unbotheredbliss) October 2, 2017
While others are less so:
Top Movies Your Boyfriend Wants to Watch:
-An Idiot Saves the President
-Rich Boy Hero 4
-Silent Hero Journey Boy
-Fight Fight Fight
— Sophia Benoit (@1followernodad) March 23, 2015
Either way, all relationships have a common theme:
Relationships are mostly you apologizing for saying something hilarious
— Brian Gaar (@briangaar) November 14, 2012
Okay, maybe two common themes:
Relationships are an expensive way to watch someone slowly like you less and less.
— shelby fero (@shelbyfero) May 20, 2014
And eventually maybe you’ll get engaged:
And once you get married, you learn to truly appreciate your partner:
If you really want to find out how annoying someone is–marry them.
— Joelle Wisler (@jowisler) September 14, 2017
Because that’s when the real adventure begins:
Being married means every day is an episode of Amazing Race Couples Edition – only it's just me trying to find stuff my husband misplaced while he is behind me yelling "you threw it away didn't you?"
— Domestic Goddess (@DomesticGoddss) November 15, 2017
Lots of adventures, actually:
If you like to try new things, like cheeseburger flavored CheezIts, then you should definitely send your husband to the grocery store.
— the Mom TruthBomb (@momTruthBomb) September 25, 2017
So. Many. Adventures.
Offering home tours, not for prospective buyers, but for my husband, who doesn't know where anything is.
— Foxy Wine Pocket (@FoxyWinePocket) February 2, 2017
And you become annoyed by the way your partner does just about anything:
Writing a love poem called "Put the Dishes in the Dishwasher, but Not Like That."
— Jennifer S. White (@yenniwhite) January 15, 2017
In fact, you get to a point where you just have the same fights over and over again:
After a while, couples should just assign numbers to their most common arguments. Save time and energy.
Him: Oh yeah? 62B!
— Housewife of Hell (@HousewifeOfHell) March 3, 2017
But with any luck, you’ll find a nice balance:
Sometimes marriage is about love & compromise other times it's about letting the garbage get so full & seeing who will cave first.
— Jennifer Lizza (@outsmartedmommy) March 11, 2015
And find compromises on most things:
Me: I love you so much! I would do ANYTHING for you.
Husband: Can you iron my shir-
— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) October 5, 2017
Hopefully you’ll figure out what works for both of you:
80% of a successful marriage is taking turns deciding who gets to be in a bad mood. The other 20% is sharing snacks.
— The Dad (@thedad) September 9, 2015
No matter how strange it might seem to other people:
We keep our marriage classy by texting each other instead of shouting through walls while we're home.
— lilswizzy (@MotherPlaylist) June 27, 2017
And you find ways to keep the mystery alive:
*Bae asked what do I want to eat*
Me: I want chicken alfre-
Me to me: tell him you don't know pic.twitter.com/lmBsgjDTsA
— Kai (@_Makilaa) November 15, 2016
You may even decide to start a family, which can make communication even more difficult:
Husband: Let's talk about it when we're not tired and cranky.
Me: So, in like 18 years?
— Deva Dalporto (@mylifesuckers) October 23, 2015
The combination of kids and sleep deprivation can confuse you:
*running to the bank with my wife with no kids*
Me: Is this a date? This feels like a date.
— keith (@tchrquotes) March 20, 2015
And will probably smother your sex life in piles of laundry:
Some people have:
Netflix & Chill.
Netflix & Wash
Netflix & Dry
Netflix & Fold
Netflix & Cry
— Difficult Mommy (@difficultmommy) May 17, 2017
But in time, you’ll compromise on all of that, too:
Husband 1st year of marriage: I don't want a TV in bedroom & let's not eat in bed.
Me 14th year of marriage: hahahahahahahahahhahahahahaha
— Meredith (@PerfectPending) October 7, 2016
Relationships are about finding someone who will laugh at the ridiculousness of life with you. They’re about being with a person who makes you want to be the best version of yourself. And yeah, they’re also sometimes about wanting to smother them with your pillow when their snoring wakes you up for the tenth time.
That’s how relationships work: sometimes they’re good, sometimes they’re bad, and sometimes they’re ugly. But if you’re lucky enough to find the right person, it’s all worth it.