Weird Things Couples Do When They've Been Together FOREVER

by A. Rochaun
Originally Published: 
together for years
Caiaimage-Paul Bradbury via GettyImages

After several years with the same person, there aren’t many things that are off-limits. The dynamic between partners who have been together for years can be hard to explain. Long-term relationships expose you to the best and the worst in your partner. But some of those things are just downright weird compared to the general boundaries of personal space. Here are some examples:

Do you regularly request your partner bring you toilet paper because you ran out and you’re in the middle of a poop? Kinda weird.

Does your PDA involve face licking instead of regular kisses? Sounds pretty weird to me.

Or maybe you’re like my husband and I and randomly bite each other on the butt. (Don’t ask.)

Below are a few weird things couples in long-term relationships do.

1. Brutal honesty

In the early stages of a relationship, you spend as much time as you can discussing your partner’s beauty. Don’t be surprised when that flattery fades. Before you know it, all those compliments will have equally as many insults. They tell you just how bad your cleaning habits are, and you know how they really feel about your new haircut. You’ll hear it all. Don’t worry, it comes from a place of love.

2. Strange inside jokes

Sometimes this can relate to the strange names we call our partners. Other times it can be a reference to a movie you watched together. Inside jokes can come up at the most unexpected times, but the hilarity of seeing other folks try to figure out what happened is priceless.

3. Discreetly, yet openly, talking about sex

“Remember that time” can provide an intro to a lot of weird topics with your partner. And sometimes, it leaves you talking about sex in public. Not in a weird, “you need to be arrested” sort of way. More like a reminiscent joking about how the way your partner eats a banana looks like they’re giving oral. Just us? Oh… Okay. NM.

4. Pooping with the door open

What’s that smell in the air? It’s the scent of quality conversation and no shame. Lots of long-term couples go to the restroom with the door open. Mine hasn’t extended to poop… YET. But if the kids have anything to do with it, it will soon, because they tend to burst in the door.

5. Trimming each other’s body hair

Ears, back, pubes… if it needs to be trimmed, there’s a long-term couple who’s done it! Call it grossness or call it complete comfort. Either way, it happens.

6. Popping each other’s pimples

Who needs the Dr. Pimple Popper YouTube channel when you have access to unlimited bumps on your partners back!? It sounds hella gross, but at some point in the relationship, you’ll probably do it. Good news is, you don’t have to feel like a complete weirdo if you enjoy it. There’s tons of research saying it’s totally a thing.

7. Making fun of each other

Some couples do this lightly — with subtle bashes at each other’s flaws (i.e. your partner’s hobbit feet). Others get a lot more serious and throw out the unexpected prank or two. I mean, if you don’t make fun of each other from time to time, are you even in a relationship?

8. Weird nicknames

No one knows exactly where these nicknames come from, but a lot of times, they feel pretty NSFW. The nicknames in our house are pretty weird. We may or may not have called each other “booty neck” affectionately at some point.

9. Regularly giving TMI

After a year or more of togetherness, chances are you’ve had at least one convo about your poop habits/ vomiting/or some other gross thing you’ve done. By five years, it’s a regular part of the conversation. Somehow, it doesn’t make you any less sexy in the eyes of your partner.

When you’ve been together a long time, is there even a such thing as too much information?

Maybe, maybe not.

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