You've Never Failed As Bad As The Person Who Designed This Rainbow Cookie Cutter

by Maria Guido

Baked goods: they’re so benign and delightful, aren’t they? There’s nothing more wholesome than a tray of cookies, and everyone loves them.

Unless they’ve been made with this epic fail cookie cutter that’s supposed to look like a rainbow cascading out of a fluffy cloud into a nice pot of gold.

Image via Amazon

Which of course it does, if you’re talented with royal icing. The problem is, your kid might not be that talented, and you may or may not have just handed them something that looks like a flaccid penis to frost.

Image via Amazon

Ooh, fun! That’s not weird at all. Maybe the person who designed this has never seen a penis. We should always give people the benefit of the doubt.

Here’s a great secret about product fails (if you didn’t already know): the Amazon reviews are always the best. Ever heard of a banana slicer? Follow the link to the reviews for hours of entertainment. But back to our poorly designed rainbow cookie cutter. The people of Amazon did not disappoint when reviewing this ill-conceived baker’s tool.

It’s not clear who was funnier: the people who got the joke, or the ones who clearly did not. These captain obvious reviews are hilarious:

If you’re already on thin ice with the rest of the room moms, you might want to avoid buying this for the upcoming St. Patty’s Day celebrations next month. You’re welcome. Parental fatigue can sometimes make us miss the most obvious things.

Does anyone sense a spike in bachelorette party sales? Or maybe adults who don’t have the sense of humor of a 14-year-old boy (like myself) will continue to buy this, decorate their rainbow cookies beautifully, and call it a day.

It’s not the first time a baker’s tool has ended up looking ridiculously phallic, and it probably won’t be the last.

Thanks a lot, patriarchy.

H/T Someecards