Tasty Cookie Jokes And Puns Sure To Make You Crumble Into Laughter

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Is there any greater mood booster than a goofy joke told by a silly kid? Maybe biting into a warm chocolate chip cookie? The truth is, eating is a reliable way to get yourself out of a slump. Feeding someone during hard times is the whole reason meal trains even exist. Feeding someone you care for is a bonafide love language. Really, it’s a thing. But, sharing a laugh can also boost your mood. Washed out of your beach vacation? Dolphin jokes can take a bit of the sting away. Just feeling general “blah?” Pop open a giant tub of Laffy Taffy and giggle yourself into a good mood. A good laugh, instigated by a bad joke, can fix practically anything.

Next time you’re delivering a batch of homemade sweetness, double up on the attempt to bring a smile. Slip in a notecard with a few of these cookie jokes and puns. You’re guaranteed to double the smiles.

Sesame Street/HBO

  1. Why did the cookie cry? Because his mother was a wafer so long.
  2. I tried to start an online bakery. But I accidentally deleted all my cookies.
  3. Why do basketball players love cookies? Because they can dunk them.
  4. How does the queen like her cookies? Decorated with royal icing.
  5. What do you call a smart cookie? Academia nut.
  6. What do you say when two cookies are getting ready for their fight? “Let’s get ready to crumble!”
  7. All these websites are asking me to accept their cookies. But I still haven’t gotten even one of them!
  8. What are the most popular cookies in Asgard? Thoreos.
  9. What kind of keys does the Gingerbread Man carry? Cook-keys!
  10. What did the baker say when he forgot the cookie sheets? Ooh, snickerdoodles.
  11. Why did the chocolate chip cookie drop all his chips? Because that’s the way the cookie fumbles!
  12. What does Cookie Monster’s parrot say when he wants a snack? “Polly wanna cookie!”
  13. Two cookies in an oven. One cookie turns to the other cookie and says, “It’s really hot in here.”

The other cookie screams, “Ahhh! A talking cookie!”

  1. What do you get when you cross a cookie and a hammer? Cookie crumbs.
  2. What do you get when you use a deer-shaped cookie cutter? Cookie doe!
  3. I ate too much cookie dough and got sick. It was an overdoughse.
  4. How do you make a baby computer cry? Delete his cookies!
  5. Why couldn’t the Cookie Monster make his bed? He couldn’t find a cookie sheet!
  6. Why do girls scouts sell cookies? They want to make a sweet first impression.
  7. Where do witches bake their cookies? In a coven.
  8. What do you call it when two cookies from the same sheet fall in love? A batch made in heaven.
  9. Why should you never make too many cookies at once? It’s too big of a whisk.
  10. Why did the thief rob the Keebler elves? Because they had a lot of dough.
  11. Why was the cookie so angry with the baker? He had a chip on his shoulder.
  12. Why did the boy go to the doctor after eating a cookie? He was feeling crumby!
  13. Why did the Oreo cookie go to the dentist? Because he lost his filling.
  14. How do you make a gingerbread man’s bed? With a cookie sheet.
  15. Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he’s feeling crummy.
  16. What’s a hyena’s favorite cookie? Snickerdoodle.
  17. What kind of snacks do little monkeys have with their milk? Chocolate chimp cookies!
  18. What do the cookie and the computer have in common? They both have chips.
  19. What kind of cookies do rich people like best? Fortune cookies!
  20. What is Homer Simpson’s favorite ice cream? Cookie d’oh.
  21. What do you call a metric cookie? A gram cracker.
  22. What’s on every young cookie’s reading list? OREO and Juliet.
  23. What is Cookie Monster’s favorite band? OREO Speedwagon.
  24. How does a German cookie greet people? Gluten-tag.
  25. What is a monster’s favorite food? Ghoul Scout cookies.
  26. What type of cookies do redheads like best? Ginger snaps.
  27. Have you tried the new Wookiee cookie? It’s a bit chewy.
  28. Me: “Three scoops of Cookie Dough in a tub, please.”

Vendor: “You want to spoon?” Me: “OK, what time do you get off?”

  1. Why did the baker get homesick? He tossed his cookies.
  2. What do you call a passed out cookie? Limp biscuit.
  3. My fortune cookie read, “You will touch the hearts of many.” Jokes on them. I’m a heart surgeon.

Cookie Puns

Need a good note to scribble with your plate of cookies? What about a decent caption for your Instagram post of the yummy treats you made last night? These cookie puns are our favorites!

  1. I did it all for the cookie!
  2. Hey Cookie, you’re the sweetest.
  3. You’re a chip off the old block (of cookie dough).
  4. One smart cookie.
  5. Life is what you bake it.
  6. You’re the milk to my cookie.
  7. Keep calm and eat cookies.
  8. Let’s bake it happen!
  9. You and me are the perfect batch.
  10. In this cookie we call life, you’re the chocolate chips.
  11. Tough cookies stick together.
  12. Life is what you bake it.

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