Costco is removing their Polish hot dog from the menu
Costco has announced that it’s eliminating its Polish dog and soda $1.50 meal combo from its food court menu — and shoppers are losing their minds with grief.
Just when you thought nothing more could possibly go wrong in 2018, this little announcement may truly be the delicious tubular meat that breaks the camel’s back.
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The elimination of our precious Polish dog — the only part of a Costco trip that makes you feel better about somehow spending $250 on nothing but diapers and Tide pods — comes with a number of other menu changes for the food court, also known as the only place you can safely eat your feelings after buying 30 pounds of mayo and a ten-pack of iPads.
People on the internet were not pleased.
KEEP THE POLISH DOG @Costco WHERE IS YOUR HUMANITY
— Jo da da da (@Woah_Jojoo) July 8, 2018
#Costco is getting rid of their Polish hot dog? Waiting for frogs to rain down from the sky and have my waffles be stuffed with snakes..clearly this is the first step towards annihilation
— Talon Bray (@TAL0IV) July 9, 2018
In place of the Polish dog (of which 137 million were sold just last year) will be a few healthier items and vegetarian items, including an organic cheeseburger, an açai fruit bowl, and a “plant-based protein salad.”
Costco CEO Craig Jelinek himself couldn’t even fake much excitement for the new salad, and how can you blame him?
“This new plant-based protein salad, I know that excites you,” he said at a shareholder meeting earlier this year. “But it is healthy. And, uh, actually, it tastes pretty good, if you like those kind of things. I tried it once.”
You guessed it: the internet did not want to hear about vegan options or fruit bowls. They just wanted their Polish sausage.
The Costco Polish hot dog is being removed for an ACAÍ BOWL?!?
I can’t take more of 2018. https://t.co/GZyhKKLcsn
— James Mattone (@TheJamesMattone) July 9, 2018
But don’t worry: there is a silver lining (uh, it might be grease) to this story: the $1.50 all-beef hot dog and soda deal, which has been in place since 1983, just 18 months after the first store opened, isn’t going anywhere. The store considers it a part of their foundation, and they’ve kept the price steady at a buck fifty even with 35 years of inflation.
“We’re known for that hot dog,” co-founder Jim Sinegal said about the wieners a decade ago. “That’s something you don’t mess with.”
Sinegal has also said that a price increase on the soda and hot dog deal would mean “that I’m dead.”
That’s pretty good news, until you consider that he’s already 82 and stepped down from the Board of Directors last year.
The dog-and-soda combos are not sold at a loss to attract customers–the company makes their own dogs at a factory in California — but they are sold almost at cost to get customers in the door and create a unique shopping experience.
— 𝕱𝖊𝖑𝖎𝖟 𝕹𝖆𝖛𝖎𝕯𝖆𝖓 🥓 (@TheGiftOfMayhem) July 9, 2018
i just learned that costco will no longer be selling polish dogs. i’d like to ask for privacy during this challenging time.
— britcoin (@booritney) July 10, 2018
All we know is: they better not touch the pizza deal or we are headed to Sam’s Club.