Disney’s sleep hotline is the answer to your bedtime struggles
If you’re having trouble getting your kids to bed and “Go the F*ck to Sleep” is a bit too hardcore for you, it’s Disney to the rescue.
That’s right, parents. If the bedtime routine is circling the drain and your kids don’t give a single shit about you telling them it’s time to sleep, let Mickey, Woody, Yoda and the gang give it a shot. Disney’s Sleep Shop is offering a sleep hotline so parents can dial up their child’s most loved character and let them lay the bedtime smack down.
Just call 877-7-MICKEY and listen to the prompts so your sleep-fighting kiddo can chose who they want to hear from most. The choices include Disney, Pixar, Marvel or Star Wars characters and we’re pretty confident every kid will find one they like with that many options. In case your little one is close to The Bad Place and really needs to start drifting off, here’s a little cheat sheet: Dial 1 for Mickey, 2 for Woody, 3 for Jasmine, 4 for Anna and Elsa, 5 for Yoda, or 6 for Spider-Man.
Just plunk your kid in adorable Disney jams and let them listen to their fave character tell them night-night. That sounds pretty freaking cute, right?
Each call only allows for one character, but you can let your kid keep calling back to listen to each one if you’re in that desperate of a spot. I’m mentally sending glasses of wine to those of you requiring multiple dial-ins. Godspeed.
Of course there’s a chance your kid will see right through the fakery and hang up on their favorite Disney pal, but for a certain age group, this could be your one-way ticket to a glass or three of pinot and binge-watching The Good Place in sweet, sweet silence.
Oh, and one more thing — the toll-free number is only available September 16-30. I know. I wish it were a year-round thing too, but maybe Disney will hear our fervent prayers and make it so. If not, a bunch of us frustrated parents can get together and make our own dang hotline. Whatever works.
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