too funny

A Comedian Posted A Fake "Baby Mute" Product And Way Too Many People Think It’s Real

The product is described as a "soundproof, breathable device to silence your baby's cries during long flights and movie nights."

by Sarah Aswell
Stand-up comedian Brad Grosse took the internet for a ride with his fake baby product, "Baby Mute."
Baby Mute / Brad Gosse

Most every new parent has dealt with a baby that just won’t stop crying, even if they’re fed, changed, and rested. Pediatricians have long recommended leaving upset babies in a safe spot, like a crib, and taking a 5-minute break to calm down. But what if there was another solution?

Enter Baby Mute, a new product that hit the market this week: a “soundproof, breathable” muzzle that allows you to live your life while your baby wails away. “Silence your baby during long flights and movie nights,” the website says, alongside a doctored picture of the product strapped to a doll’s face.

Of course, before you get too upset, know that the product is fake. It’s the silly brainchild of Toronto-based stand-up comedian Brad Gosse, who’s well-known for his dark humor, especially when it comes to his series of “Rejected Children’s Books” like Mom and Dad’s Swinger Party and The Cat That Shat, or to his coloring books that are in equally terrible taste.

The Baby Mute website looks totally legit, except for the obvious fact that the product is completely objectionable.

“The mask is designed to gently cover your baby’s mouth and nose, reducing the sound of their cries by 87%,” the fake marketing copy reads. “This means that you can keep your baby calm and comfortable, while still enjoying your favorite movies or TV shows.”

“I wish I had found the Baby Mute sooner! It’s made car rides so much easier, and I can actually listen to music or podcasts without being interrupted by my baby’s cries,” reads a fake review of the product.

And if you still might somehow believe that it’s real, the doctors endorsing the product on the website have joke names, too, including “York Hunt” and “Michael Lit” (say them out loud if you’re still not catching on).

Gosse tells Scary Mommy that the website took off almost immediately after he published it.

“I’m a comedian and come up with a lot of weird ideas,” he says. “I created the website on Monday, posted it yesterday and it went crazy really quickly. People couldn’t decide whether it was real.”

The phone number on the website actually goes to Gosse’s phone, and he’s already gotten about 200 calls — mostly from people wondering if it’s a joke.

In case there is any remaining doubt, he answers the phone with: “Thanks for calling Baby Mute — it’s a great day to silence your baby!”

While Gosse is a dad to two teenagers, he says his kids weren’t really an inspiration for the gag. “I think I just hate babies,” he says with a straight face.

Then he gets a little more real, at least for a second: “I’ve always liked the idea of creating fake things that people think are real, and this is one times that it worked out really well,” he explains.

Over on Reddit, the Baby Mute product quickly gained traction in the “Oddly Terrifying” subreddit, where some gullible parents were flipping out about the product while others were having a good laugh. Gosse’s Instagram post blew up as well.

“I hope this comes in adult sizes as well,” one person quipped.

“Two words. Ny…..Quill,” another wrote.

“That’s so smart, just leave it on all the time,” another joked.

But others assumed too quickly that Baby Mute is really on the market.

“I'm sure this will have zero effects on psychological and emotional development,” said someone not in on the joke.

“I'll be damned if I put a muzzle on my children,” another wrote.

“Child abuse,” another said.

And they would all be right!

And just in case someone has to say it (and I hope that this is not the case): never, ever put anything over your baby’s mouth to stop it from crying.