From The Confessional: Single Moms Have A Lot To Say, And We Need To Listen

by Karen Johnson
Scaty Mommy and Cavan Images/Getty

Single moms are the toughest of the tough. They often have no one to fall back on, no safety net. They know their paycheck is the only paycheck. They are the only one there when their child gets sick, needs help with multiplication, or cries because they were excluded from a sleepover. But they’re also the only one there when the car gets a flat tire, the roof is leaking, and the dog puked on the rug.

Single moms, more than anyone else, were steeled for this pandemic. Doing it all alone? That’s their wheelhouse. However, when there’s no more childcare and they still need to put food on the table and now their kids are in virtual school… that’s why Covid-19 hit this demographic the hardest.

But they endured. They figured shit out, as they always do. They are tired beyond measure and don’t know how they got through some of these days and weeks and months, but they proved over and over how tough AF they really are.

Single moms—you’re the real heroes.

If I had known my marriage would fail, I never would have had children. This whole full-time single mom thing is SOOOO hard. I love my kids and would never, ever give them up but dammit...sometimes it would be nice to not be shouldering this all alone.

Confessional #25797989

I'm a single mom in the middle of a move with D7. This is too much. The movers come in 2 days and I'm nowhere near ready. I work the next 2 days and only have the evenings, but I'm supposed to be painting D7's room then. I feel like a failure.

Confessional #25800052

I am a teacher and a mom. We found out today school is 100% in person. My son and I both have asthma and are on immune-suppressant drugs. I am a single mom. I throw up every morning with worry. How can I keep us safe teaching 27 children?

Confessional #25788893

Single moms do it all. Like literally ALL OF IT. Pandemic or non-pandemic, they are responsible for feeding, clothing, and housing everyone, plus handling every single daunting challenge that comes at them or their kids. It can be too much, yet often they have nowhere to turn for help.

Exhausted single mom here, homeschooling my 9 year old while working from home full time. She’s autistic and has adhd, love that fierce little girl but damn, she makes me tired.

Confessional #25797838

All these mental health AHs say “know when to take a break and “make sure you practice self care and give yourself a break!” Single mom of 3 here. No family around. Work from home & homeschooling. How TF am I supposed to get a break?”

Confessional #25800830

And then, over the past year, Covid-19 dumped “unexpected homeschool teacher” into the laps of moms everywhere. Moms who still had to earn a living at the same time. It’s understandable that when society tells them to “practice self-care!” they get stabby.

I hate being a single mom. Ex ran off with another woman 3 years ago. I hate the stigmas and stereotypes associated with being a single mom. I raise and provide for my kids 100% on my own, even own my own home. Yet society sees me as a burden.

Confessional #25786209

My conservative coworker doesn’t know I’m divorced. I left an abusive marriage. He broke my heart. I’m not a whoreish single mom. Not sorry.

Confessional #25804556

As a woman engineer, I've worked twice as hard to get where I am. I am looked down on by society for being a single mom. Now I am asking for "extras" b/c school is all virtual. Scared I will lose everything I worked for.

Confessional #25794548

And on top of handling every single shit-storm (literally and figuratively), single moms also have to face unfair judgment from bitchy Nancies who don’t know anything about them. Even though they are the most badass of all the badasses, there is still a stigma attached to single moms, and it’s fucking bullshit.

I’m so jealous of people who get to take nice vacations. I’m a single mom and only 1 kid and I don’t take him anywhere. All my money goes to bills. Nothing left. Nothing saved. I fail.

Confessional #25799232

I'm a single mom and a teacher. I've already spent over 1K of my own money on the curriculum and tools I need to teach through covid. I am numb.

Confessional #25794595

The financial burden of single motherhood is stressful and terrifying, knowing that the money can run out at any time. And knowing that no matter how hard you work, you still may never be able to give your kids the life you want to give them.

I'm tired of being alone as a single mom, but I hate dating.

Confessional #25793668

I’m a weird, single mom divorced 40 something with baggage. In sum, I’ll be single until I die.

Confessional #25801574

You’re alone. Like alone, alone. And it can be really, really hard.

Single mom here. Would love to have random, hot, string free sex, but I also want to have a connection. I meet guys online, but then I push them away before we really connect. So I'm celibate and horny af.

Confessional #25802465

I had the HOTTEST sex dream today. I came in the dream (maybe IRL too? IDK I was sleeping.) I haven't had sex in 5 years (single mom). I hope it's one of those dreams that mean something about what's coming up!

Confessional #25800380

And you’re horny! But getting some action while raising kids on your own can be tricky. In fact, it can be damn near impossible.

Single mom and no asshole to rely on. I feel super proud that I can pay all the bills, take care of my kids, and even take them on vacation all on my own. Relying on a man is the most overrated bullshit

Confessional #25838438

I think the reason why my life was so much easier as a single mom was because I was a working mom. After divorce, the only difference was that I didn’t have to take care of a man-baby, and that was a huge bonus.

Confessional #25805885

Being a single mom is actually fine if it weren’t for the stupid deadbeat dad still being alive. I wish he would just disappear so we can live in peace.

Confessional #25805874

However, despite the endless challenges, lots of single moms say that considering the alternative—staying with an asshole who made their lives miserable—they’d choose single mom life any day. So at least they know they have control over that part, and they can be proud of cutting off that unnecessary dead weight that was bringing them down.

In the end, single moms are truly the heroes of society as they raise kind kids who know how to appreciate their mom and all her hard work. They may not have two parents raising them, but they have one kick-ass mom who loves them enough to fill their hearts up completely. And if that’s what your kids feel at the end of the day, you’re doing great. So tonight, if you can, put your feet up and relax for a minute or two. You deserve it.