Hilarious Tweets About Toddlers That Every Parent Can Relate To

by Joanna McClanahan
Originally Published: 
@xplodingunicorn / Twitter

I’m pretty sure toddlers were put on this earth to help keep parents humble.

The way they scream and cry at all hours of the day and night. Or how they get mad when you don’t understand their made-up languages.

They act like tiny, drunken dictators, insisting that they get to eat and watch whatever pleases them. Then they refuse things like basic hygiene and touch everything with their sticky hands.

Parents of toddlers are like a support group that no one actually wants to be a part of. But thanks to Twitter, we can at least find humor in the potty training and sleep deprivation.

First, we have the creation of toddlers:

And their uncanny ability to give us anxiety:

Even when we should be sleeping:

Even more so when they tell us what’s on their minds:

Or when we have to worry about the things they touch in public:

So sometimes we just need a break:

And sometimes we stretch the truth:

We do what we have to do to stay sane:

Because they’re constantly trying our patience:

And they’ll never eat what we want them to:

Or drink what we want them to:

But they know what they like:

No matter how gross it might be:

They never, ever stop talking:

Sometimes with a British accent:

But at least they’re predictable:

Like I said, they keep us humble:

They could keep anybody humble:

RELATED: These Are The Only Chuck Norris Jokes Chuck Norris Has Allowed To Exist

Although some of us are better at wrangling them than others:

But at the end of the day, they’re our little hellions, and anyone who doesn’t like them can fuck right off:

They might be next to impossible to reason with, and even tougher to keep clothes on, but they’re only small for a little while.

Before you know it, they’ll be sweaty, hormonal teenagers who I hear are actually much worse.

This article was originally published on