35 Glee Quotes That'll Give You All The 'New Direction' Nostalgia

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Glee Quotes
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When Glee premiered back in 2009, it proved to be the phenomenon no one saw coming. Set in high school (the fictional William McKinley High School, to be exact), it took off the kid-gloves to deal with pressing social issues facing teens — like sexuality, race, and romantic relationships. At the same time, those serious cultural conversations were set against the backdrop of… a glee club. Is it really any wonder there are so many Glee quotes that have been preserved in pop culture memory?

And that’s to say nothing of the many careers the musical series practically launched: Lea Michele as Rachel Berry, Matthew Morrison as Will Schuester, Kevin McHale as Artie Abrams, Naya Rivera as Santana Lopez, Amber Riley as Mercedes Jones, Chris Colfer as Kurt Hummel, Heather Morris as Brittany S. Pierce, Chord Overstreet as Sam Evans, Darren Criss as Blaine Anderson, and Cory Monteith as Finn Hudson. Oh, and we’d definitely be remiss not to mention that the show gave us the fierce woman (force of nature, really!) that is Jane Lynch as cheerleading coach Sue Sylvester.

Granted, the show has a bit of a heartbreaking legacy now. Still, rewatching the series — and reliving it through hilarious Glee quotes — lets us embrace the good times. So, keep reading for some of the series’ most iconic moments. And when you’re finished strolling down memory lane of this fictional harmonic high school, check out our High School Musical quotes.

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Best Sue Sylvester Quotes from Glee

  1. “You think this is hard? Try auditioning for Baywatch and being told they’re going in another direction. That was hard.”
  2. “We’re dealing with children; they need to be terrified. It’s like mother’s milk to them — without it, their bones won’t grow properly.”
  3. Will Schuester: “Let’s bury the hatchet, Sue.”

Sue Sylvester: “No. I won’t be burying any hatchet. Unless I get a clear shot to your groin!”

  1. “Bringing down this club may be easier than I thought. I am engorged with venom and triumph.”
  2. “I’m all about empowerment. I empower my Cheerios to live in a state of constant fear by creating an environment of irrational, random terror.”
  3. “I don’t trust a man with curly hair. I can’t help but picturing birds laying sulfurous eggs in there, and I find it disgusting.”
  4. “This is what we call a total disaster, ladies. I’m going to ask you to smell your armpits. That’s the smell of failure, and it’s stinking up my office. I’m revoking your tanning privileges for the rest of the semester.”
  5. Sue Sylvester: “High school is a caste system. Kids fall into certain slots. Your jocks and your popular kids up in the penthouse. The invisibles and the kids playing live-action out in the forest: Bottom floor.”

Will Schuester: “And… where do the glee kids lie?” Sue Sylvester: “Sub-basement.”

  1. “I realize my cultural ascendance only serves to illuminate your own banality. But face it, I’m a legend. It’s happened.”
  2. “The English language lacks the requisite words to express just how much I dislike you.”

Other Epic Glee Quotes

  1. “Life only really has one beginning and one end, and the rest is just a whole lot of middle.” — Will Schuester
  2. Brittany Pierce: “I have pepperoni in my bra.”

Santana Lopez: “Those are your nipples!”

  1. “I’ve never wanted kids… don’t have the time, don’t have the uterus.” — Ryan Murphy
  2. “Every time I light a fire in my life, you find a way to make sure it burns the forest down.” — Will Schuester
  3. “Your wife is going to be pushing a watermelon out of her boy-howdy in five months! She doesn’t need nice!” — Kendra Giardi
  4. “Have you ever liked someone so much you just wanna lock yourself in your room, turn on sad music, and cry?” — Rachel Berry
  5. “They say it takes more certainty than talent to be a star. Look at John Stamos.” — Emma Pillsbury
  6. Finn Hudson: “Look, I owe you guys an apology. I never should have quit. I don’t want to be the guy that just drives around throwing eggs at people!”

Rachel Berry: “That was you?” Kurt Hummel: “You and your friends threw pee balloons at me.” Finn Hudson: “I know.” Kurt Hummel: “You nailed all my lawn furniture to my roof.” Finn Hudson: “I wasn’t actually there for that, but I’m really sorry.”

  1. “If you can master this, you can sneak anything out of a store between your knees. Shoes, prom dresses. I once got a cake out of a kid’s birthday party with the candle still lit.” — April Rhodes
  2. “Your friend stinks of soap, Quinn.” — Sheila
  3. “Shouldn’t you be in college or something? I thought gay people are all successful overachievers.” — Kitty Wilde
  4. “Hey, how do you spell loser? I’m gonna write it on his forehead.” — Dave Karofsky
  5. “You might think that all of the boys in school would want to tap this, but my MySpace schedule keeps me way too busy to date.” — Rachel Berry
  6. “I’m gonna say this as nice as I possibly can, but you look like a sad clown hooker.” — Finn Hudson
  7. “I don’t know why I find his stupidity charming. I mean, he’s cheating off a girl who thinks the square root of four is rainbows.” — Kurt Hummel
  8. “Who cares what happens when we get there when the getting-there has been so much fun?” — Will Schuester
  9. “You’re irritating most of the time, but don’t take that personally.” — Artie Abrams
  10. “Are you questioning my badassness?” — Noah Puckerman
  11. “I won my first dance competition when I was three months old.” — Rachel Berry
  12. “Enough! I’m sorry, Mr. Schue, Ms. Sylvester, but if we wanted to hear Mom and Dad fight, those of us who still have two parents would just stay home on payday.” — Finn Hudson
  13. “You’re the most talented person I know. Even more than that guy at the mall who can juggle chainsaws.” — Finn Hudson
  14. “You know, I used to love coming here. But now this just reminds me of everything that I’ve lost.” — Santana Lopez
  15. “Sometimes if you want to make change, you gotta make a little noise.” — Blaine Anderson
  16. “We’re all losers. Everyone in this school! Hell, everyone in this town. Out of all the kids who graduate, maybe half will go to college — and two will leave the state to do it! I’m not afraid to be called a loser, because I can accept that’s what I am, but I am afraid of turning my back on something that actually made me happy for the first time in my sorry life.” — Finn
  17. “There comes a moment in every performer’s life that defines him or her, sometimes for the rest of their career. This is our moment. We’ve struggled. We’ve endured. And now we must triumph.” — Will

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