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Here’s How Our Family Is Planning To Celebrate The Holidays — Even If It’s Without Our Regular Traditions

by Scary Mommy
Updated: 
Originally Published: 

Wow, 2020 has been quite a decade. Sorry, a year. It has just felt endless, hasn’t it? Like a seven-part documentary, or a PTA meeting with no baked goods. But with winter upon us and holiday planning already underway, it’s clear that this strange chapter in our children’s future history books is coming, if not to a close, then at least to a page break.

It’s a little weird hanging lights, wrapping gifts, and baking cookies when the national mood might best be described as “post-traumatic shock,” but just like the a certain green, grouchy misanthrope before me, I’ve accepted that you can’t stop the holiday season from coming. You have to embrace it, however you can. And it can still bring some much-needed magic into our lives. Here’s how my family is adjusting our expectations this year:

If We’ve Got to Stay Home, We’re Going HAM on Decorations

I live in the Northeast, where the holiday season already means hunkering down indoors as the temperatures drop. But in 2020, staying in has become a mandate, not a choice. We’re not traveling to see family this year, so I’ve decided to go all in on decorating my home. I will not rest until my living room looks like a showroom that has been infiltrated by spastic elves with the budget of a small DIY TV show.

You know how smiling can supposedly trick your brain into feeling happy? This is like that. The more aggressively I decorate, the more I force holiday cheer on everyone lucky enough to be quarantined with me.

We’re Leaning In To (Comparatively) Silent Nights

Depending on where you fall on the introvert-extrovert spectrum, the cancellation of the in-person holiday party circuit might be a blessing or a bummer. On the one hand, there’s no more last-minute potluck panic, uncomfortable shoes, or awkward chit-chat with co-workers or neighbors you’d rather avoid. On the other, there’s no excuse to put on makeup or eat your own weight in peppermint brownies (Zoom cocktail parties notwithstanding).

Until we can safely gather in groups again, we have no choice but to retire our festive outfits and martini glasses in favor of comfy slippers and mugs of cocoa. So in my house we’re enjoying new traditions of sitting around the fireplace or the kitchen table playing board games, rolling out perfectly imperfect cookies, and watching our favorite holiday movies.

Don’t worry, our kids will still be embarrassed by your ugly Christmas sweater even if there’s no one there to see it!

We’re Giving With More Gratitude

If there’s a silver lining to this year it’s that it has done more than countless hours of (admittedly, sporadic) guided meditation and bullet journaling ever has to help me focus on what is truly important: health, safety, food security, housing, and the bonds of family and community. The holiday season always skews towards heart-warming “aha” moments, but in 2020 the season of giving feels all the more poignant. With so many people across the country out of work, ill, or otherwise struggling, there’s never been a better time to give to those less fortunate.

In our family that means donating to local food and diaper banks, making “care kits” for homeless families, and giving to organizations that provide toys and clothes to needy kids. We also know people who are organizing holiday toy drives at their schools, places of worship, and neighborhood associations.

Maybe it’s the eggnog talking but there really is no greater gift than knowing I’ve helped another human being. And no, I’m not just referring to gracing them with the sight of the strobe light-illuminated animatronic snowman on my lawn.

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