How To Find Your Mom Tribe In A Sea Of Randos

How To Find Your Mom Tribe In A Sea Of Randos

by Alison Bucalo
Originally Published: 

Finding mom friends is no easy task. Finding regular friends is hard enough, but adding mom to it? This means you need a real strategy in place. Here are some tips on how to find a mom tribe. Subscribe to Scary Mommy:

A great way to make a new mom friend is to have the back of a stranger. Your kindness will come back to you. We all have moments where we’re in a bind, so why not make the first step and help a mother out? Come to the park or playground ready with supplies. There is always a mom in need of a wipe and now, you’ve just made a friend.

Let’s take it up a notch. It requires having some phone numbers and some guts to be the initiator. Start simple with initiating a standing park playdate. Make sure to include a specific time, day and location to meet. Whoever shows up is jonesing just as much as you for a friend. You’ll be surprised to see how the number of moms may grow on your standing playdate and if it doesn’t, you made one great friend. And that’s all you need.

Now, let’s leave playdates for the kids. It’s time to step it up. Organize a mom’s night out. If you have a list of moms from ballet or preschool or any group with a kid that’s the same age as yours, send an email to them. Make sure to include the word “grown-ups.” And after bedtime, even a total stranger would gladly sit at a table with anyone not wearing superhero pajamas.

Congrats, you’re on your way! Now that you’re forming a tribe, make sure to diversify it. Not all moms are made the same. Some like to stay home. They can get out of a jam when you need someone to pick you kid up from preschool. Some moms are CEO’s who give great career advice. Some are amazing party enablers. Collect them all! And nurture them like a plant or let them die.

Which brings us to this point. Know when to break up with a mom friend. There will come a time when you find the toxic mom-kid combo. Maybe the kid is a biter and the mom is judgy. Whatever it is, if you don’t like them, cut them loose. Don’t make playdates with people who don’t fit your vibe. We don’t want haters, we don’t want fakers and we definitely don’t want yoga pushers. We want one thing – cool moms.

With any luck, you will have put together a baller mom tribe. The types of moms who laugh with you when your kids are killing you. Girl, bye. You’ve been Momsplained.

About Momsplained: Moms, listen up. It’s time for some straight talk, mother to mother. “Momsplained” is a series of unfiltered tips on how to tackle everything motherhood sends your way.

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