Watch: Your Step-By-Step Guide to Surviving Age Nine

How to Survive Age 9

October 28, 2019 Updated June 17, 2020

If you’ve found the terrible twos to be, well, terrible, try raising a 9 year old. While we’d happily take teething and potty training over the pre-teen years any day, our step-by-step mom guide to age nine should see you through. Here is Momsplained with some tips on how to survive nine! Subscribe to Scary Mommy on YouTube here.

First, get ready for the door slamming, the foot stomping, and the arm crossing. The best you can do is take a moment to think about how sweet they were when they were your little angel babies. Break out the old photo album as your nine year is breaking off the door hinges. Just remember, this phase will pass. 

What’s that smell you ask? Your kid’s armpits. They’re more active now and they’re also bigger. So, they’re going to need some help in the body odor department. There’s nothing wrong with encouraging more showers or even adding some deodorant to the morning routine. Of course, keep it chemical free! Anything to keep it odor free!

If you’ve got a girl, you may have heard of the VSCO girls. That’s right. It’s an app and it’s got a certain style. Short shorts are all the rage in VSCO world. That doesn’t mean your daughter has to have her booty hanging out. What’s wrong with some long shorts? Some culottes? Who doesn’t like the word culottes? Probably your nine year old. 

The good news? It’s not all bad. The best part of your little one turning nine years old? They are finally pretty independent and they are dying to make that known. They’re mostly competent human beings, so take advantage of that. Let them do things. Even better? Let them do things for you! Why should you always make breakfast? 

The bad news? Years 10 to 12 are coming, which means bras and pubes. I’m not ready for that yet just yet. Let’s enjoy nine. Until then, you’ve been Momsplained.