Parenting

Seriously, Why Are Baby High Chairs Always So Dang Bulky?

by Katie Cloyd
clunky kid furniture

Kids are little…so why does their furniture seem so big? I think I ask myself this question about 10 times a day. Whether I’m stubbing my toe on the stool in the bathroom, moving a little table to vacuum around it, or just trying to figure out where the heck to put it all, kid furniture seems to find a way to be tiny and feel gigantic at the very same time.

I thought it would all feel so much easier when we left the baby phase and I bid adieu to the swings, cradles, bassinets, play saucers and Jumperoos. I was wrong.

Because even after all of those things were packed up and sent to new homes, my personal kid furniture nemesis remained: The dang fricking high chair.

I can’t go a day without tripping on a leg, snagging my pocket on it as I walk by, or having to push it out of the way so I can get through the kitchen carrying laundry baskets. This thing has been here for two years. I should be used to it.

But it’s enormous. It’s a regular-size high chair, but when you’ve been unsuccessfully trying to find a good “home” for it for the last 24 months, it really starts to feel humongous.

When I picked out this model that semi-folds up into a flat standing position, I thought I was making the best possible choice for our open-floor plan, small-ish home. The baby would eat, and then I’d fold it up and roll it over to the wall. Done. Easy peasy.

Except, I was pregnant, and I guess I was blinded by the cuteness of this rose gold high chair. I somehow didn’t plan for the fact that we don’t really have walls. Our “dining room” is just one corner of the large open room we call our living space. Same goes for the kitchen. There is truly nowhere to put this thing against a wall unless I get rid of my buffet. I can’t sacrifice that storage space, and I honestly just don’t want to give away something I love to make room for a piece of kid furniture that is (hopefully) only going to be here for another year-ish.

My daughter is two. I know that some people have the kind of toddler that can be trusted to sit at the table with everyone else by this age. Heck, I had two of those myself before this wild animal came along masquerading as my human child. My daughter is 3rd percentile for size, but greater than 97th for mischief. Trust me on this. The high chair is still a necessity on every level.

So, in my house, the high chair is the dreaded piece of kid furniture that is sticking around. Even though the high chair drives me bananas, I really have no choice but to deal with it. I can’t be alone — what’s the demon furniture in your house?