Parenting

These Lazy Mom Hacks Will Change Your Life -- And Make You Laugh

by Valerie Williams
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She shares “helpful” tips we can actually use

Are you tired of the “mom hacks” you see on Facebook? Those cheery videos full of tips from women who actually wash their hair and have enough free time to make those perfect videos to begin with?

Fear not. We have the antidote, and you’re going to want to make her your new mom BFF.

Liz Meli-Wischman is mom to four kids under five, and as such, knows a thing or twelve about parenting “hacks” that are actually realistic. Every Monday, she shares a video as part of her series called #MomSoHardMondays where she shares the wisdom she’s gathered from momming four small children, all day, every day.

Her latest is a list of hacks any mom can stash in her arsenal, because they’re all doable af. And also, hilarious.

OK, so they’re not really hacks, but most of them are probably things we all do sometimes. Or if you’re me, pretty much every day. They include such gems as leaving a package of cookies where your kids can reach them so when they wake at dawn, you can quiet their breakfast pleas and continue to snooze.

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Brilliant. Though I’m a fan of Cheerios for this purpose, because I hoard all the Oreos for my daily cry-eating behind a locked bathroom door.

Meli-Wischman’s next helpful tip is submerging the dirty dishes in soapy water and forgetting they exist in favor of paper plates and cups. Now, we don’t advocate trashing the planet, but during the survival years of raising babies and toddlers, when every single drink all day requires a new cup, the disposable kind can be a huge time-saver. We’ll make up for it once the kids are old enough to help with the dishes. AKA, never.

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This genius mom says dealing with dirty laundry is a snap — when you don’t have to look at it! Simply stack it in baskets on top of the washer and dryer, shut the door, and forget about it. Sounds good to us.

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Meli-Wischman suggests hiding clutter in the kids’ rooms when company comes, because as she points out, their rooms are shitholes anyway, so no one will even notice.

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As far as personal care, when you have no time to shower and are out of dry shampoo, sprinkle on a shit-ton of baby powder. She acknowledges that it will make you hair look like it’s going gray, but when you have a zillion kids, that’s expected anyway. When it comes to bathing your little rugrats, a spritz of perfume to give the illusion of clean is a huge time-saver.

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Her last and most useful hack? Teaching your older kid to fetch you a beer, because as she says, “You worked hard today, you deserve it.”

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Damn straight, we do.

Meli-Wischman tells Babble, “The inspiration behind the video was simple because I found myself doing these hacks in my everyday life!” In making her latest video, she hoped to make her fellow moms laugh and also, to let them know that it’s OK if they don’t always have their shit together. “Moms are hard workers,” she says, “and sometimes we just need to close the door and forget about the laundry for a day or two … or a week.”

Hell. Yes.