11 Ways ‘90s Moms Found Self-Care In Their Days

This was my own mom’s favorite move: go to the grocery store alone, taking the long way there — and the long way back home. She was knocking a chore off her to-do list, but getting to do it in a slower, nicer fashion than usual (chasing me and my siblings up and down aisles and begging us to stop throwing treats into the cart).

“My friends and I were all working moms in the ‘90s, and our kids were all in sports, so it felt hard to find time to get together. But Sunday afternoons were for us. Sometimes we’d all take our kids — we rotated houses — and sometimes we’d show up alone, but we’d all get together for coffee. Even if it was just an hour. Always felt refreshing to head back home after that.” — Molly P., 63

“I know people worry about how much TV their kids are consuming, but back then, I was more concerned with my kids sitting too close to the screen. Letting them watch cartoons while I ate my own snack and read a paperback on the couch behind them was the only version of self-care I had time for, and I felt zero guilt about it.” — Debbie R., 67

Yes, even in the ‘90s, walking was a thing — but nobody called them Hot Mom Walks. Even if it’s just 15 minutes, many of the moms I spoke to who raised their kids in the ‘90s said a walk saved their sanity on more than one occasion. Walk with a friend, walk alone, walk with your kids on their bikes — fresh air will always do the trick.

Every Friday night in our house was a treat because it meant our mom was taking us to the grocery store to pick out our very own Kid Cuisine frozen dinner meal. Never did I wonder what my mom was eating, but it turns out she would eat her own girl dinner or order Chinese food or eat whatever she wanted after we were in bed. The ultimate self-care win.

I know, we aren’t supposed to count this one as “self-care” because it benefits everyone in the house, but listen — sometimes it has to be done, and you might as well make it “me time” while you do it.

“I used to wake up early on a Saturday, put on some music, and just start cleaning. My kids stayed out of my way because they didn’t want to get roped into cleaning, and when the kitchen floor was wet, I’d sit on the counter with a cup of coffee and enjoy the 20 minutes of alone time.” — Sarah P., 58

A puzzle was a staple in my home as a kid, and my mom often had one just hanging out on the coffee table or dining room table for days at a time. She’d work on it in little spurts — while drinking her coffee, after we went to bed, on a Saturday morning, while we all ate cereal in front of the TV — I’m bringing back puzzles in my house. They aren’t just for game night or a “scheduled” family puzzle time.

No texting, no FaceTime — just call a friend and talk to them on the phone, and tell your kids to leave you alone. So much self-care is rooted in wanting to recalibrate yourself and feel like you again, and what works better than talking to someone you love about anything and nothing and everything... all at the same time?

With or without your kids, the library was a popular spot for a ‘90s mom on a Saturday afternoon. Pick up a mystery paperback, a romance novel, some historical fiction — whatever you’re thinking. If your kids are old enough, have them go to the kids’ section on their own while you browse for 10 minutes in silence. That was my own ‘90s mom’s self-care go-to.

You know what, ‘90s moms didn’t stress about what their kids were doing during the day. Telling them “go play” was plenty enough direction, and then mom just got to do what she wanted and/or needed to do during the day. If you can figure out how to ignore your kids and not go on an unnecessary guilt trip, this might be the best ‘90s mom self-care hack of all.

Crocheting, gardening, drawing, whatever you want — but a hobby is a great way to get some self-care into your day. You can just focus on this one thing that belongs solely to you, and even if it’s only 20 minutes at a time or done with your kids alongside you, a ‘90s mom still totally would’ve counted it.