Remember when you were naming your children and you considered things like making sure they could easily spell their name or that it wouldn’t break your hand when you filled out school paperwork? The opposite seemed to be true for a linotype operator from Philadelphia. Born in 1904, the man known “simply” as Mr. Wolfe + 585, Senior, claimed the Guinness Book of World Records for the World’s longest name. His last name is more than 600 letters long and, as you can see below, takes a whole paragraph’s worth of space to type out. Interestingly enough, his last name is only one unique aspect of his whole name. He also has 26 first names — that’s one for each letter of the alphabet.
Meet Hubert, also known as Adolph Blaine Charles David Earl Frederick Gerald Hubert Irvin John Kenneth Lloyd Martin Nero Oliver Paul Quincy Randolph Sherman Thomas Uncas Victor William Xerxes Yancy Zeus Wolfeschlegelsteinhausenbergerdorffwelchevoralternwarengewissenhaftschaferswessenschafewarenwohlgepflegeundsorgfaltigkeitbeschutzenvorangreifendurchihrraubgierigfeindewelchevoralternzwolfhunderttausendjahresvorandieerscheinenvonderersteerdemenschderraumschiffgenachtmittungsteinundsiebeniridiumelektrischmotorsgebrauchlichtalsseinursprungvonkraftgestartseinlangefahrthinzwischensternartigraumaufdersuchennachbarschaftdersternwelchegehabtbewohnbarplanetenkreisedrehensichundwohinderneuerassevonverstandigmenschlichkeitkonntefortpflanzenundsicherfreuenanlebenslanglichfreudeundruhemitnichteinfurchtvorangreifenvorandererintelligentgeschopfsvonhinzwischensternartigraum, Senior.
According to a 1964 article in The Free Lance Star, Mr. Wolfe + 585’s last name tells a very detailed story. As you’d expect from an older gentleman with a mind for the unique, the story is a bit of a rambler. The basis: It’s about a wolf-hunter who lived in a stone house in Germany and traveled across space. (That’s the shortest, least confusing version.) That wasn’t the first time Mr. Wolfe + 585 had his name in the paper, though. It appears his rise to name-fame actually started when another newspaper reported that a “Wolfeschlegelsteinhasenbergerdorff” had registered to vote. That, it seems, was the abbreviated version that he used for legal purposes/paperwork. However, our hero-of-sorts allegedly wrote the reporter to let him know that he’d misspelled the “hausen” part of his last name.
Adding to this absolutely jaw-dropping story, you might have noticed the “Senior” tag at the end of his name. Mr. Wolfe + 585 had two sons, Timothy Wayne Wolfe + 585 and Hubert etc. Jr. That’s right. Hubert and his wife, Constance, decided to name a son after Hubert.
In more recent name news, a woman pledged to change her name as part of a charity drive. As of 2012, her new name was Red Wacky League Antlez Broke the Stereo Neon Tide Bring Back Honesty Coalition Feedback Hand of Aces Keep Going Captain Let’s Pretend Lost State of Dance Paper Taxis Lunar Road Up Down Strange All and I Neon Sheep Eve Hornby Faye Bradley AJ Wilde Michael Rice Dion Watts Matthew Appleyard John Ashurst Lauren Swales Zoe Angus Jaspreet Singh Emma Matthews Nicola Brown Leanne Pickering Victoria Davies Rachel Burnside Gil Parker Freya Watson Alisha Watts James Pearson Jacob Sotheran Darley Beth Lowery Jasmine Hewitt Chloe Gibson Molly Farquhar Lewis Murphy Abbie Coulson Nick Davies Harvey Parker Kyran Williamson Michael Anderson Bethany Murray Sophie Hamilton Amy Wilkins Emma Simpson Liam Wales Jacob Bartram Alex Hooks Rebecca Miller Caitlin Miller Sean McCloskey Dominic Parker Abbey Sharpe Elena Larkin Rebecca Simpson Nick Dixon Abbie Farrelly Liam Grieves Casey Smith Liam Downing Ben Wignall Elizabeth Hann Danielle Walker Lauren Glen James Johnson Ben Ervine Kate Burton James Hudson Daniel Mayes Matthew Kitching Josh Bennett Evolution Dreams.
No one is telling you how to live your life or anything, buuuuut…