After her husband stepped up, she took to Facebook to preach
You can keep your baes and your Tinder and your boombox serenades. A happily married woman took to Facebook to share what love looks like in your forties.
Expressions of love change when you get older, and sometimes leaving work to rescue your wife when she forgets her wallet is better than rose petals on the bed.
Amy Midtvedt is a mom, wife, and blogger at Hiding in The Closet With Coffee. The Facebook page describes the blog thusly:
“We drink coffee. We hide from our kids. We’re nicer and hug them a lot when we come back out. We write about all of it. We never stop looking for the joy.”
Based on a post earlier this week that has over 500 shares, Amy doesn’t have far to look, thanks to her husband Todd.
“Yes, that’s my amazing husband who is arriving on the scene with his credit card because what you can’t see is me, standing next to a cart super full of groceries that I couldn’t pay for because I couldn’t find my wallet.”
She shared a picture of her smiling husband arriving at the grocery store to save the day after she found herself at the register without any legal tender. An embarrassing moment for her, and surely an inconvenient one for him, having occurred in the middle of the work day. You wouldn’t know it, though.
“Not sure you can tell, but he’s smiling at me. Yup…he had to leave work and he is smiling. His only words of admonishment were, ‘You’re not supposed to be grocery shopping I said I’d go this week.'”
You’d expect him to throw a little shade at his wife, but all he can muster is an admonishment that she shouldn’t even be bothering to run the errand he promised he would do. Boss threw shade at himself.
Based on the rest of her post, it sounds like par for the course for this man.
“Love also looks like me coming downstairs to a full pot of coffee every morning because coffee is love. Love looks like all the lunches being made already so I can enjoy that aforementioned cup of coffee. Love looks like someone washing the dishes while his wife catches up on This is Us while plopped on the couch not helping at all. Love looks like a super patient dad doing the 5 year old’s homework with him every morning so I can get to work on time. Love looks like running to the store before bed after your wife has forgotten to buy milk because you know the morning will be easier if we can serve up some cereal.”
Apparently, he’s been pulling this knight in armor routine since college!
“In college this love looked like boyfriend Todd running to the store for a danish I was craving or watching me and my friends on the dance floor long after he wanted to leave the bar or him being known across campus by the flower backpack he was carrying which of course was mine.”
After defining those prosaic displays of love that, when you’re older, become just as momentous as showy proposals and expensive gifts, Amy took the opportunity to share some advice to the youngsters on the dating scene.
“Do not be fooled by big, showy promposals and giant cards with candy bars glued to them with some cute saying or by your name spelled in pepperoni by a boy who’s asking you to homecoming.”
She’s right, of course. Passion and lust get all the press, but love is less about an explosive beginning than it is about the steady middle. The long haul. And what happens behind the scenes.
“Watch how he treats you when Instagram isn’t looking.” And how he responds when you forget your wallet.
Amy tells Scary Mommy she’s beyond gratified by the response her post is getting. “It’s rare to have a piece reach this far and be so positive…so that’s amazing to me.” But what really moves her is seeing other women praise their husbands the same way.
“So far the best part about this post is all the positive comments and wives tagging their husbands to thank them. The specific comments thanking their knights in shining armor for the ways they are loved are bringing me to tears.”
Don’t worry, I’m sure Todd is nearby with a handkerchief for you!