A big topic of conversation for women who have a few kids grabbing at them all the damn day is they have nothing left once the moon comes up: no desire to be touched, much less fondled or laid on top of. And the effort it takes to please our partner is hard to come by. We’d trade sleep for sex most nights, afternoons, and weekends.
Maybe you’ve tried essential oils or supplements to get your libido revved up. Perhaps a glass of wine and back rub does it for you. Sometimes women just need a flicker of desire in order to get our minds right so we can be all in when it comes to being intimate. It can take longer than it does for a male, and a lot of times, we need our mind to be turned on before our body gets the memo.
And the arousing news is, according to a study by Sonos and neuroscientist Dr. Daniel J. Levitin, your next orgasm may only be a song (okay, more like four songs) away.
We all have our favorite tunes. They have gotten us through many long car rides, tough workouts, and rage-cleans. But music possesses special powers too. Think about the wave of emotions you feel when you hear a song that has a special meaning for you or reminds you of someone close. And who hasn’t been listening to a badass Beyoncé song and felt they could rule the world as they dance around the kitchen throwing pasta in a pot?
Middle fingers up, put them hands high
Wave it in his face, tell him, boy, bye
It certainly makes sense. If it can make you feel that liberated while making dinner for your family, just think of what it can do for your mattress dancing.
A 30,000 person survey was conducted and a whopping 67% of participants said they had more wild nights spent entangling their lower beards when they used music as an aphrodisiac. It seems if you put in something sexy, whether it’s a little “Doin’ It” by LL Cool J (which is great for some down and dirty lovemaking), or some John Legend for a more slow relaxed approach, you are more likely to come together with your partner when you can unwind with some good tunes.
It’s not just because music can remind us of times gone by and make us feel nostalgic, or because we can strip to Harry Styles in the background either. Levitin says listening to music can actually get your love juices flowing. “Listening to new music activates the novelty detectors in our brains, and modulates levels of dopamine, the feel-good neurotransmitter/hormone in the brain, that serves as a reward,” he says.
And you know what else is a nice reward? All the orgasms you will be having.
But be sure you aren’t only saving your DJ skills for when it comes time for the old lust and thrust. Blast that music while doing everyday activities. It elevates your mood and brings people together. The study also found families who listened to music at home spent an additional 3 hours and 13 minutes a week together. Bonus!
So if things are getting a little stale between the sheets, break out the music, play your favorite jams, and take a note from LL: Conventional methods of makin’ love kinda bore me / I wanna knock your block off, get my rocks off / Blow your socks off make sure your G spots soft. Ahem.
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