crossing the line

New Mom Goes Off On Grandma For Kissing Her Baby

She wonders if she took it a step too far.

Originally Published: 
A new mom posted in the “Am I The A**hole?” Reddit thread, seeking advice from others about her cont...
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When a new baby comes into a home, boundaries are set based on how comfortable mom and dad are feeling. That might mean waiting a few months for visitors or taking your shoes off before entering their house.

No matter what others may think about the rules that mom and dad set in place when it comes to their newborn, they need to be respected. Period. This includes grandparents.

So, when one mom lost it on her own mom for kissing her two-week-old baby after explicitly asking her not to, sh*t hit the fan.

Reddit user u/ThrowRAScreamingBans posted in the “Am I The A**hole?” Reddit thread, seeking advice from others about her contentious predicament with her mom and her newborn.

“My mom (F61) lives overseas and came to help out with the new baby. She is a doting grandma, but tends to do things her way so there have been a few hiccups,” she prefaced.

“The pediatrician was very clear that NO ONE should kiss the baby other than my husband and I. The baby's little immune system is too weak, and God forbid he gets something. I was very clear about this to my mom, who was resistant but I was firm and told her no holding the baby at all unless she agrees to no kissing. So, no kissing was agreed.”

Things took a turn for the worse when, though she and her mom agreed on no kissing the baby, the OP walked in on her mom kissing and snuggling the baby.

“I was so upset, how long had she been doing this behind my back?! My mom justified it by saying that the baby was now two weeks old and nothing bad had happened, so we could start building his immune system. She also said rules like these were why so many children had allergies nowadays,” she wrote.

After her mom doubled-down on kissing the baby, she completely lost it on her mom, calling her a “selfish cow” and telling her that “when the baby d*es from a preventable disease, it will be her fault and hers alone.”

She continued, “I told her she was lucky I wasn't kicking her out, and the only reason I wasn't is because she has no place else to go.

After the heated exchange, her mom decided to leave on her own accord, remarking that she was “clearly not welcome in [her] grandchild's life” and calling the OP’s aunt to complain about the situation which leads to why the OP wants to know if she’s in the wrong in this situation.

Not only is her mom villainizing her, but her aunt as well.

“[She] called to tell me that I should be ashamed of myself and that my son should count his blessings that he has a loving grandmother. Now I wonder if I was a bit intense, and probably could have been a bit more relaxed. So was I the AH?,” she asked.

After going viral on Reddit with 4.3k upvotes and over 2k comments, Redditors weighed in on the OP’s story, mostly siding with her on this issue.

“Your pediatrician was clear about this, you were clear about this, she didn't listen. Your child's health comes first and you are a very fresh mom, of course you gonna react strongly when she endangers your baby. She should know this,” one user wrote.

Another echoed, “Babies die from preventable disease everyday. It suffer difficulties because of those preventable diseases. The best prevention? Don’t kiss kids that aren’t yours. Keep your germs to yourself. Keep your flu, RSV, COVID to yourselves. Cause if you don’t and the kid dies…it is one hundred percent your fault.”

This is one of those cases where anyone who is not the parent needs to check their issues at the door and adjust accordingly if they want to be a part of this kid’s life.

Read the entire thread here.

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