This Referee Crashed Out On Parents At A Youth Soccer Game & TBH We’re On His Side
“People are reluctant to volunteer their time so they can be chirped at by people that can’t be bothered to volunteer themselves.”
We’ve all been at the kids’ baseball or soccer game where some parent along the sidelines is way out of line. Maybe they’re screaming at the coach to put their child in, or reaming the ref for a “bad call,” and none of it actually serves their child (who is usually just humiliated by the whole scene). Don’t get me started on the parents “coaching” their kids at a regular freaking practice. Well, unsurprisingly, sports teams’ staff and referees have had enough, and one ref’s recent crash out was caught on camera.
Tik Tok user Dennis Poulette (@drpoulette) captured a video of a referee at what appears to be a high school girls’ soccer match laying into parents on the sideline. We don’t see what incited the ref’s frustration, but the video picks up as he walks across the field to address the parents sitting along the sidelines.
“Do I look like I should be doing seven games in 24 hours? No, I don’t,” says the unnamed referee. “You know why I’m doing seven games in 24 hours? Because there are fewer and fewer people that are willing to do this.” He goes on to say that most often, refs become unwilling to participate in youth leagues “because of you people,” he says, gesturing at the parents. “So why don’t you just grow up, please!” he shouts, as the wall of grownups begins to applaud. Clearly, they wanted the unruly parent who started it all to shut up too.
It’s true that many youth sports leagues have difficulty finding enough referees to cover all their games all the time. One Reddit thread about referee shortages posits some different theories about why a shortage exists, and commenters say out-of-control parents are definitely part of the equation. “My kid is 16. Reffed for two years when he could around his MLS Next schedule so it was hard but he wanted the money and enjoyed doing it. He didn’t re-up at the end of 2024 and said ‘I don’t get paid enough to get yelled at,’” one parent commented.
“Whenever I’ve asked other parents about volunteering to referee the first words out of their mouths aren’t that they are too busy, or they don’t know the game, or that they can’t stand being around little kids playing soccer — it’s that they don’t want to deal with the parents/coaches. Full stop,” wrote another Reddit user, who refs and coaches in youth sports. “People are reluctant to volunteer their time so they can be chirped at by people that, by and large, can’t be bothered to volunteer themselves.”
In the comments on the video itself, one referee said he doesn’t address parents directly anymore, but will tell coaches to get them under control or the team will be carded. Another said their league instructed them to do the same, and that games can be forfeited if the unruly parents don’t tone it down. Another ref replied saying they tried proposing a rule that if a parent has to be ejected their player must leave with them, in an attempt to persuade these full grown adults to control themselves.
So while we may not get to hear what the parent in this situation was saying that finally caused this ref to snap, chances are they absolutely deserved this little sermon. Youth league coaches and refs spend so much time pouring into our kids and making it possible for them to play — the least we can do is show them some respect.
