You'll Never Regret Having More Kids

by Danielle Sherman-Lazar
Originally Published: 
Dani Sherman-Lazar laying and holding her newborn baby in a hospital bed in black and white
Courtesy of Dani Sherman-Lazar

You’ll never regret having more kids.

Let me finish that sentence properly. You’ll never regret having more kids once that child is here.

You may regret it when you’re 34 weeks pregnant, and it takes so much effort to do the littlest things.

You may regret it when you’re in labor with an excruciating pain dominating your whole being. A pain so intense that your breath is taken away, and sweat forms in places you didn’t know produced sweat.

But once that baby slides into the hands of your ob-gyn/midwife and is placed on your chest, something changes.

Skin-to-skin and any regret disappears.

Because the second that child enters this world, he’ll steal a part of your heart that you didn’t know you had left to give.

That no matter the level of chaos she brings — the addition to the laundry load, the mental load, and the endless mess — she’s worth it.

No matter how much you can’t afford her.

No matter how much time you don’t have.

All of those doubts will just become things you’ll figure out.

And you’ll make it work—because she’s more important.

Courtesy of Dani Sherman-Lazar

You know this is so because when he leaves the house, there will be no sigh of relief — just an absence, a loud piercing silence. A presence missing that can’t be filled by anyone but him:

His cackling laugh when he thinks something is over the top funny.

The way he says things in that comical deep voice when mocking you.

His warm embrace, with his body, and his smell.

The way he enters a room and the way his other siblings react to him.

Her personality becomes a part of you.

It becomes something you crave and need to get through the day.

Because you love her that much—

you aren’t whole without a dosage of her.

You aren’t whole without all of your kids being with you—

and you’ll never regret that kind of love.

Note: A lot of people suffer from postpartum depression and won’t feel the feelings described above right away, and I want you to know that’s more than okay and completely common. You are not alone, and you are most definitely still a good mom. Make sure to reach out for help and support.

We are Scary Mommies, millions of unique women, united by motherhood. We are scary, and we are proud. But Scary Mommies are more than “just” mothers; we are partners (and ex-partners,) daughters, sisters, friends… and we need a space to talk about things other than the kids. So check out our Scary Mommy It’s Personal Facebook page. And if your kids are out of diapers and daycare, our Scary Mommy Tweens & Teens Facebook page is here to help parents survive the tween and teen years (aka, the scariest of them all.)

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