Planters Kills Off Mr. Peanut In Weirdly Dark Super Bowl Commercial

The Estate of Mr. Peanut/Youtube

Pardon the pun, but this is nuts — Planters, the iconic peanut brand, just blew up its beloved mascot

Bow your heads for a moment of quiet introspection, because Planters peanut company has officially put its mascot out to pasture. As in, Mr. Peanut is no more. Dead. Gone. The ghost of peanut jingles past. This is not a drill. Planters dropped a truly grim Super Bowl commercial on Wednesday seeming to show the demise of their “spokesnut.” They then confirmed the casualty via Twitter caption, writing, “It is with heavy hearts that we confirm that Mr. Peanut has died at 104. In the ultimate selfless act, he sacrificed himself to save his friends when they needed him most.”

They even changed their social media handle to “The Estate of Mr. Peanut,” with a black-and-white profile pic showing a single tear falling from Mr. Peanut’s trademark monocle.

So, how did this travesty occur? In the company’s newly posted Super Bowl ad, Mr. Peanut is cruising along in the NUTmobile with pals Wesley Snipes and Matt Walsh when an armadillo crosses their path. Swerving to avoid hitting the armored mammal (as they listen to “I Just Died in Your Arms Tonight,” no less), the peanut van goes off a cliff. The trio manages to grab a branch on their way down, but it can’t bear the weight of all three. Mr. Peanut, giving Snipes and Walsh a knowing nod, sacrifices himself by letting go.

The fallen NUTmobile explodes in a fiery burst shortly after Mr. Peanut’s fall, seeming to incinerate any hope the dapper peanut survived. These are truly dark times we’re living in, friends.

Samantha Hess, Planters’ brand manager at Kraft Heinz, fondly recalled the fallen nut in a statement, saying, “He will be remembered as the legume who always brought people together for nutty adventures and a good time.” But that’s not all she said, and TBH we can feel hope starting to creep back in. “We encourage fans to tune in to Mr. Peanut’s funeral during the third quarter of the Super Bowl to celebrate his life,” she hinted.

Hmm, sounds like a cleverly executed (too soon?) marketing campaign to us. Is it possible Mr. Peanut did survive and this is all a gimmick to get people talking about the brand? After all, it’s been around for a minute. Perhaps Planters feared enthusiasm for their nuts had grown stale.

If such is the case, they’re certainly getting an ego boost courtesy of the Twittersphere — people are losing it over the passing of the nostalgic spokesnut. And, in the true spirit of mourning such a legendary legume, they poured out their hearts and souls with some seriously salty puns.

“Is this a joke cause there’s nuttin funny about it,” said one sad fan. “I’m shell shocked,” deadpanned another.

Fellow brands are also pouring out a metaphorical jar of chunky PB in honor of their recently deceased friend. “Always classy, always crunchy, always cleaned up nicely. We’ll miss him!” lamented Mr. Clean. “Help us give a 21 dunk salute to our nutty and sweet friend,” wrote Oreos. Snickers commiserated, saying, they “would sacrifice it all for the nut,” too. And yep, that got weird fast.

Then again, this is all a bit unorthodox, wouldn’t you agree? When did brands start martyring their own mascots for attention? And when did we grow so attached to Mr. Peanut that the very thought of offing him sends us into a Twitter spiral? We’re not sure, and yet here we are.

So, now we wait. And when the Super Bowl rolls around, we won’t be rooting for the Chiefs of 49ers — we’ll be #TeamBringMrPeanutBack all the way.