Parenting

Single Guy Thinks His Female Neighbor Should Cook For Him And LOL, No

Pixabay and Reddit

Reddit immediately shut this guy down for being, you guessed it, an asshole

Ah yes, the “Am I the Asshole” sub on Reddit. It continuously delivers novel-length questions from delusional people who, more often than not, are absolutely the asshole in whatever scenario they’re describing. This latest “AITA” story is so ridiculously creepy, sexist, and just plain weird that the entire internet is shutting this dude down.

A 31-year-old man who lives alone and is willfully ignorant about learning how to cook for himself decided to take to this sub to complain about a female stranger he approached and asked to cook for him. Yes, really.

So basically this grown man thinks he’s special because he, too, gets hungry throughout the day. Instead of oh, you know, researching easy recipes that aren’t “boxed mac and cheese” he decides that he is entitled to benefit from the tantalizingly delicious smells coming from his female neighbor’s apartment. He is not friends with this neighbor, he admits he doesn’t even know her name, but he thinks making her an offer to cook for him is a perfectly normal and acceptable thing to do.

“I can always smell her cooking in the hall and it always smells amazing (I know it isn’t the other person at our end of our hall cause it’s a single old man),” he explains without any hint of satire. “I’ve even complimented it a few times. So I got the idea that I’d offer to give her some money each week to cook a little extra and bring it over to me (or I can pick it up from her!) at night. She’s cooking anyway and then I’d have varied presumably delicious food.”

Excuse me, what? Could you imagine doing this? Worse yet, could you imagine having someone approach you about your cooking smells and decide you should be their personal chef?

“I asked her the next time I saw her and she looked surprised and said she couldn’t because she was too busy (which didn’t make sense cause she cooks almost every day but okay),” he goes on. “The next time I saw her a few days later, I asked her if she was sure and upped the amount I was offering, and she said she was sure and that it was rude to ask me, and that she isn’t a housekeeper for hire and I should get a housekeeper if that’s what I want. She also called me ‘a stranger’ even though we have talked in the halls before.”

He also mentioned that she was wrong in thinking he was “creepy” because she wasn’t his “type.” Hoo boy. Instead of a cookbook, perhaps this guy needs a self-help book on the art of self-awareness. Thank Beyoncé for the internet, where people are only too happy to give assholes like this dude a little dose of it.

The universal, resounding response is that this guy was absolutely the asshole and there was no hesitation in letting him know just how much of one he is. The OP eventually admitted he realized he was being one, thanks to all of the comments, and agreed to leave the poor woman and her delicious cooking alone.

But seriously — WHY. ARE. MEN.