Feeling like a hot mess, Mama? So does Tess Holliday right now, and she wants you to know that’s okay
We probably don’t have to tell you that we’re living in strange and uncertain times. The word unprecedented is in near-constant rotation. The coronavirus pandemic still looms, leaving fear and sorrow in its wake. And if you’re a parent or caretaker, you’re grappling with all of that while trying to keep tiny humans alive and well.
It’s a lot. So, Tess Holliday has a message for you about it: if you aren’t one of those parents living their best quarantine life on social media, you aren’t alone. The model and mom-of-two took to Instagram on Wednesday to remind us all that it’s normal to feel like you’re falling apart a little at the moment.
To be clear, it’s okay if you are one of those Instagram moms pulling fresh loaves of banana nut bread out of the oven or nailing the #SavageChallenge.
But Holliday wants to make sure those of us who aren’t exactly thriving understand that doesn’t mean we’re failing. “I’m doing my best. I’m doing my best, I’m doing my best,” she began the caption of a cute snapshot of herself with her 3 ½-year-old son, Bowie. “Being a parent is already 24/7 guilt/stress/anxiety, but being a parent during all of this is another level of anxiety that I didn’t know existed.”
There are the memes, though. You know the ones, right? The ones telling us that with so much social distancing downtime, we should all come out of the coronavirus pandemic with a slew of new skills. Holliday is here to set the record straight: This period of stress and anxiety isn’t a magic formula for productivity across the board. And, one more time for the cheap seats in the back, that’s totally fine.
“I’m finding it so difficult to navigate work or to even feel creative enough to put out content, find time for myself, or most importantly, be a present parent. I feel so much guilt that I’m not able to juggle it all & stay sane right now. I constantly feel like it’s not enough,” she shared. “I know I’m not alone in this. So far all of parents & caretakers out there, it’s okay to not have it all figured out right now. If someone tells you they do, they are lyingggggg.”
As for Holliday, she’s keeping it real. That means you probably won’t see any cutesy quarantine content on her social feeds anytime soon — including “tik tok dances, bread recipes or hair tutorials.” What you will find is a touchstone. Another mom just trying to keep her head above water.
“[I]f you want dumb memes, someone who cries in the bathroom while eating cold scalloped potatoes & begging their 3 yr old to not drink the bath water, then you’re in the right place,” she said. “We are all just doing our best right now, whatever that looks like. I’m sending y’all love & hugs right now.”