The 2019 Madge The Vag Holiday Gift Guide

The 2019 Madge The Vag Holiday Gift Guide

by Alison Bucalo
Originally Published: 

The holidays are here and so is the stress of finding gifts for your loved ones. Fear not because Madge the Vag knows just what to get for everyone on your list.

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Feltmelons Vaginament

Looking for a gift that has a personal touch? Check out these handmade Vaginament from Feltmelons on Etsy! These lovely labia ornaments are hand sewn, lightweight and come in a variety of colors and sizes – just like nature intended. The shiny 9mm bell even jingles. Go ahead and give it a diddle. Starting at $18, the Vaginament by Feltmelons is guaranteed to become a family heirloom, passed down from generation to generation.

New plusOne Air Pulsing Arouser

The holidays can be a mess of stress and the one thing that can calm those nerves? The NEW plusOne air pulsing arouser. Nothing says “ahhh” like masturbating. This adorable hand-held toy has five levels of intensity and unique air pressure waves. That’s right! These pressure waves create a sucking sensation for your clitoris. It’s like a little tornado for your twat. Plus, the silicone body is waterproof so you can use it in the shower. If that’s not enough, it comes with a rechargeable lithium ion battery and a USB cable. So you can charge it on your desk at work right from your laptop. The Arouser comes in at $35. Great for your stressed-out sister or the grab-bag at work.

Thinx Period Panties

Not only is it THAT time of year, it’s THAT time of the month with THINX period panties. THINX are reusable cotton panties that can replace single use period products. THINX are leak resistant and odor-controlling. Not to mention, environmentally friendly. They are super comfy and come in different colors and style – from boy shorts to thongs. You just rinse, wash and hang to dry. THINX are the gift that keeps on giving. Can’t pick a favorite? Try the Saver Sets starting at $64.

Lady Suite Beauty Rejuvenating Botanical Oil for Intimate Skin

For the ladies who like their beavers bare, we have the Lady Suite Beauty Rejuvenating Botanical Oil for Intimate Skin. Lady Suite hydrates your hooha and whoha doesn’t love that? Perfect for pals that like to shave, wax, laser or trim their hedges. Lady Suite comes in a 1oz bottle filled with beneficial blend of organic and naturally-derived botanical oils that brightens, smooths and calms your clam. Remember ladies, this is only for your vulva and conveniently available in the Scary Mommy store… what do you know about that?

Pharmacy Gift Certificate

Give the gift of contraception and convenience with a gift card to… the pharmacy. Now friends and family can get their birth control pills prescribed by the pharmacist. No more time wasted at the doctor’s office. 12 states offer this, so make sure to check before you purchase. Nothing says “love” like stress-free sex.

No matter who is on your gift list this year, you can’t go wrong with Madge’s perfect picks. Happy Holidays!

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