Crib-Surfing Toddler Is Not Possessed, Just A Normal Demon Child

Video captures kid surfing his crib, parents insist he’s not possessed, just a toddler

Video monitors are a convenient way for parents to watch their kid without hovering over their crib. They’re meant to provide peace of mind, allowing us to make sure our children are okay while we’re in the other room, being adults. But they often backfire, as Connor Booth’s parents recently discovered.

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Chuck and Kate Booth were shocked when they saw a nanny-cam video of their son scaling his crib and proceeding to ride it like a surfer’s dream wave, if the surfer was Beelzebub. Because Connor’s highlight reel also featured bizarre growling and glowing eyes. Check out the creepy video footage.

On the one hand, I gotta hand it to the kid; his balance is impressive! On the other hand, WTF? And also, what else is new?

If you have kids, you don’t need need video proof of their insanity. You see it every single day. But the Booth family’s video of their toddler pulling a “Point Break” on his crib in the middle of the night has led some to refer to the child as “possessed.” I’m gonna go ahead and assume that those people don’t have children of their own.

I didn’t have a video monitor with my first kid, but I do with the second one, and just two months in, I’m already questioning that decision. I’ve never looked over at the screen to see my son straddling his crib and growling like Rick Moranis at the end of “Ghostbusters” but I’ve never needed to. I’ve seen enough found footage movies to practically piss my pants any time I take a quick look and catch my baby staring right at me through the camera. Watching. Judging. Pooping.

I never assume my kids are possessed though, because children don’t need demons inside them to scare the hell out of us. They ARE the demons. We’ve all experienced the bone-chilling shock of waking up in the middle of the night and seeing your silent, creeping kid’s face staring right at you from the side of your bed. This kid’s parents agree.

According to Yahoo, Chuck Booth, Connor’s dad, insists that while the video is “100 percent real,” his son is not actually possessed, and the glowing eyes are simply a result of the “night vision on the camera.”

Sure it is, Chuck. Sure it is.

Possessed or not, if I were this kid’s parents, I’d be looking for endorsements. My five-year-old hasn’t shown that kind of coordination when he’s wide awake in the middle of the day, let alone in a dark room at 2:00 am. These parents are sitting on a goldmine!

At the very least, Monster Energy drinks should be down.