5 Ways to Gain Facebook Likes (And be a Total Dick)


I used to write a series of social media and blogging tips until I realized how silly it was to write tips for a medium which is constantly changing. Google + hangout what? The minute you think you’re an expert in this field, something new comes along and suddenly you’re not nearly as swift as you thought you were.

So who am I to judge what’s right or wrong in social media anyway?

Well, I take it back; I’m judging. I’m judging the shady and ridiculous ways people are using to gain Facebook likes because it’s enough already. It’s frustrating to people who actually try and build community on their pages and it’s deceptive for people who use Facebook innocently for fun.

Plus, those pages that crop up and suddenly have 100K likes overnight? They’re getting sold for a hefty profit and guess what, you just made some sketchy creep rich off of your like. Congratulations!

Don’t want to do that? Then avoid falling for these practices…

1. The “I don’t want to seem like an asshole or curse my future children” like. Joey has pediatric cancer. Cancer is bad. Joey is cute. Like if you hate cancer. Like if you love an old person. Like for world peace! Like if puppies are adorable. Like if you support our troops. Like if you love gay people. Like if you are against child abuse. Like if you love your mother. Like, like, like!

Cancer Facebook Scam

Remember “Mallory,” that sweet little girl with Down Syndrome who didn’t think she was beautiful? Her brother posted the above picture along with a plea to like it, in order to prove to his sister just how beautiful the world thought she was. People clicked, more than 3.5 million times. You, go, Mallory!!

Except that it wasn’t his sister Mallory after all, it was actually Katie, the daughter of Terri Johnson and the last thing Terri feels is appreciation for your like. Want to help sick kids or make a difference in the world? You’ll have to do something more than click a button. Sorry.


2. The “let’s let complete strangers make important life decisions for us” like. We’ll have another baby if we get 10,000 likes! He’ll propose for 100,00 likes! She’ll say yes if I get to 250K likes! Is Facebook going to be picking up your dog’s shit at 3AM because she ate a jar of Play-Doh or paying for your marriage counseling because, it turns out, you married the wrong person 100K likes later? No. I’m afraid not.


3. The dead celebrity who’s not really dead phenomenonThis page told you to click if you were sad that Morgan Freeman died. Who wouldn’t be sad that Morgan Freeman died? Except that he isn’t dead, almost a million likes later. Whoops.


4. The type to watch something happen, except nothing does like. You want to see Jesus appear on your screen? Or watch a jpeg come to life and illustrate a bear eating a man? Or receive a hidden message about the secret of life? I suggest you look somewhere other than Facebook.


5. The “share for share” phenomenon, also known as S4S, where pages do nothing but pimp out other pages and beg for a pimp-back. What a lame ass way to interact.

How about we bring Facebook back to what it was once about — actually connecting with people? Can we at least try?

P.S. Those Ugg boots or Cheesecake Factory gift card you’re waiting for from sharing some link on Facebook? They’re never coming.


About the writer

What started as an innocent on-line baby book to chronicle Jill's stay-at-home days with her children, quickly transformed into a vibrant community of parents, brought together by a common theme: Parenting doesn’t have to be perfect. Learn more here.

From Around the Web


Christian Newman 2 years ago

I started a Facebook page recently and just received and invitation to S4S. It didn’t feel right, so I turned to Google and found this page. I want people to visit and like my page because what I post there is helpful to them – nothing else. I’ve made my decision. Thanks!

sears coupon codes 2 years ago

Coupon was found in comments and posted by kalpana. In fact, girls shoes are embroidered with sequins and
beads that give these shoes a touch of elegance and pure style
that was always the most important factor for girls. ” in big letters he wanted to go get some, even thought I regularly pay $1.

Stacey 2 years ago

I hate those “Cancer/child abuse/global warming/black market baby goat rings sucks and if you have a shred of decency, you will like and share this post on your wall for one hour. If you don’t, you’re a heartless asshole who is going to spend eternity burning in hell”. Those statuses are the online annoyance equivalent to Jehovah’s Witnesses banging on your door at some ungodly hour…no thanks

Beth 2 years ago

Can we make a plaque out of this and hang it everywhere? The people of the world need to see this. I hope this post gets a million likes.

The Next Step 2 years ago

and for chrissake check snopes.com before you share something wildly fantastic that just seems to good to be true!

and you were TOTALLY not bitchy, but those others were. And they can’t use then/than properly.

Sharon H 3 years ago

I have to say that I had not seen the picture of “Mallory” or the fake story circulated originally. But a couple days after this post I happened to see that a popular boy band had reposted the story (a friend posted a comment on it, I swear I don’t follow boy band fb pages). Because I had seen it here, I posted the link to the real story of Katie. Within an hour the story was pulled. She IS a beautiful little girl. It’s a shame about how her picture has been used.

Debbie Spence 3 years ago

I noticed the same thing.

Debbie Spence 3 years ago

Hah, I actually just came to you from a Facebook Share!

I can’t believe someone would go off on you like that. I’m a busy body with my page. 99% of the time, I’m on my page, and I visit other pages as my page and chat. If they don’t want me posting as my page, all I need is a message to my inbox saying so, or a comment and I’m cool with that. But I go as my page to other pages I’m interested in and I interact. If I’m not welcome as my page, I move on. I would never think to react like that girl and freak out like that. Nor would I request someone to share my page like that, unless I knew from previous experience that that kind of thing was okay. There are a few pages that we share each other’s contests etc, so they just message, or post and I do the same. Honestly, if she wanted you to share she could have sent a message and asked politely if you wouldn’t mind sharing, and then if you said no, then move on.

I’ve actually never heard of “S4S” myself, though I have seen those pages where you must share to get a share back, but those pages are specifically “Like” pages.

I personally enter a lot of “Like and Share” contests, Rafflecopter contests, etc. And sometimes I get sucked into the “Like this Photo for whatever crap reason”. But it does bug me that people “expect” you to share their page, or share their contest, etc.

When I do contests, I use a Shortstack program that gives me their name, email address and address for mailing the prize so I can just confirm with the winner and send it out. The “like a billion pages or follow a billion Twitter accounts” contests annoy me, even if I enter some of them so I don’t do them because I know many people have expressed distaste for them.

I guess if I was like other pages and relying on “sponsors” for prizes more often, then I guess I’d have to do the same sort of thing, but at this point I don’t, nor do I normally ask for people to “Share” my page or my contest. I like active fans who I recognize and will chat with me on a daily basis. I would much rather they NOT share a contest I’m having because that just means that some random person might win and they don’t even actually know what my page is about or care, and that bugs me. It happened my last contest and I never even heard from some of the winners if they received their prize. A true fan posts and lets me know they’ve got their prize because they’re on the page interacting with me already anyway.

And, I just blabbered on. Nice to meet you by the way!

Suburban Snapshots 3 years ago

PREACH. (You horrid cunt.)

Lane 3 years ago

Well said! I can’t believe she had the audacity to call you that. Kudos for sticking to your guns.

kc @ genxfinance 3 years ago

The things people would do just to get noticed. Sometimes, I think it’s pathetic already…

Kristen Brakeman 3 years ago

Wow that’s just funny. My best Sally Field here: I “FB” like you, I “FB” like you!

I hate the desperate please for likes in FB and twitter.
But I know where it comes from – agents telling authors that no one will publish them unless they have huge following in social media.

Jane D’Oh 3 years ago

Hey – I know you blacked out the names, but not very well. I can still read them – the initials a AD and SH.

Lisa 3 years ago

I love this post. All those Like this post crap makes me crazy. And then the conversation between you and that other person who asked you to promote his/her blog is just too freakin funny. That is something I would want to say, but am too chicken. You go girl:)
Sharing this post on my facebook page for sh$$ts and giggles. Cheers!

Mama and the City 3 years ago


I keep trying, and trying and trying to explain this to my idiots friends – who all come from my third world country. They believed everything since the era of email chains, remember those? yeah. I got ton of spam at my work email. Not it’s on my facebook feed.

– the spam doesn’t cure cancer
– facebook won’t donate for my ‘like’
– etc. etcetera

I guess they need it explain by someone else. I will share them this. Thank you.

Nadia @ Mama and the City

Arnebya 3 years ago

It’s the religious ones that irk me: Like my page and prove that Jesus didn’t die for nothing.

I’ve tried my best to build a community but Facebook is just not gonna do it for me; I want to care, but… (well, that’s not true; I do care but not enough to ask people to like my page because Jesus wept.)

just JENNIFER 3 years ago

Building my Facebook community is actually what I’m working on right now. I cannot stand the stupid things you described above! Should we be twisting people’s arms? I think not.

June O’Hara 3 years ago

Inspirational messages…Please share, please share, please share…I can’t. I’m just the wrong person for the job.

Anna 3 years ago

I agree Ariana! I think we need Jill to write us an acceptable list for linking blog posts. :) I’ve only done it to friends who might need a laugh.

Anna 3 years ago

lol! Great idea to post links! I think I’ll go search for some good ones now…

RiaLys 3 years ago

That is probably my biggest hate on Facebook! I’ll delete anyone who “likes” those pictures, then send them a message explaining exactly why they were just deleted!

Elle 3 years ago

Dang you scared me. So I liked your page. Only cause I was scared though!!

And I didn’t think you were at all bitchy. There was a great deal of stupidity in those comments however…not pointing any fingers though!

Mary Jo 3 years ago

Soooo…what you are saying is that cut of Bill Gates’ billions isn’t coming my way because I shared and liked that picture of him?
WHHHHAAAATTTT? That’s just straight up BS!
Well, I will be smarter next time and only share a pic to get that free $1,000 Walmart Gift Card.

hee hee! :)

Thanks for this! I loved it! I ALWAYS think the same way when I see those “share” or “like” posts.

Darcy 3 years ago

These tactics are crappy for sure. And if she wanted to ask S4S she could have asked privately or just let it go. Some of that stuff is easy to fall prey to when new but usually you do that with other newbies not a big respected page.

Also I wish FB didn’t show what I liked in the feed. I should be able to like whatever I want w/o friends/family seeing it constantly. Save that for when I decide to share it!

Abigail 3 years ago

Okay clearly this S4S person is a genius. I mean, who WOULDN’T want to promote someone’s page after being called bitchy and the C word? Obviously I’ve been doing this Facebook thing all wrong because I thought writing well and being a decent human being was the way to go.

Scary Mommy 3 years ago

Damn!!! Next time!

Evalynn Rose 3 years ago

I hope Google+ stays a ghost town… it is seriously creepy the way it ties everything together – all without your permission. Not a fan.

Evalynn Rose 3 years ago


Evalynn Rose 3 years ago

Re: annoying friend requests:

The requests are not a mistake, and the most prompt ones tend to be from “frenemies,” (really, just plain enemies who write/say passive aggressive bitchy things to people when insecure or feeling particularly dominant that morning, but will probably smile at you in real life while asking way too personal questions, or ask you to do things for them that don’t make sense [“omg, buy me some farm animals puleeeaassee!!”]…see ppl who wrote on scary mommy’s facebook page above) or people you barely know who are addicted to gossip. Seriously, my unaccepted friends request thingy is a mile long… I consider it a list of ppl who don’t understand how boundaries work. It keeps me organized.

Or, if ignoring ppl isn’t your thing, you can also deal with uncomfortable friends requests like this:

Alison 3 years ago

Shell, you’re one of the most generous bloggers on Facebook that I know of. I can’t imagine why people would get irritated if you don’t get to them quick enough – what’s up with the sense of entitlement?

Shay Trashay 3 years ago

I cannot believe that someone treated you that way! I have only been chatting with you for a couple of weeks, and you have been the nicest, most helpful blogger I have ever encountered. I can attest to the fact that you are a huge promoter of blogs and do all that you can to get our work out there. I know that you weren’t fishing for compliments with this post, but I just had to say something. The NERVE!!

JD Bailey @ Honest Mom 3 years ago

I just ignore the S4S crap. And the randoms who ask me to share their page on my page. And *especially* the randoms who beg me to share their page and I find out they sent the exact same message to my blogging peeps. Spammers, beware: bloggers talk. We know your tactics.

Sometimes I wonder if people resort to these desperate tactics because Facebook is showing our posts to fewer and fewer of our fans. Ex. I post a link to my latest post, and maybe 1/10th of my fans see it. Grrrrr. I’ve thought about the “pay to promote” option, but many of my blogging friends said they got punished by FB and after their paid posts ended, their regualr unpaid posts reached even LESS fans. Sigh.

I’ve gotten so fed up with FB that I’ve taken to Pinterest more – and it’s been my #1 source of traffic most weeks. And I’m warming up to Google+, though it’s still a bit of a ghost town!

Lady Jennie 3 years ago

Let me scrape my jaw off the floor from that last exchange.

Kim at Let Me Start By Saying 3 years ago

Sometimes, Jill, you complete me.
I’ve worked hard for each one of my Likes, never ONCE cursing anyone with genital fleas or Bubonic Plague for deciding they didn’t like my sense of humor or writing style.

Chantelle 3 years ago

Amen, dammit. And I know you wrote this regarding Facebook crap, (and I apologize if someone else already mentioned this), but it also reminds me of those morons on Twitter who BEG celebrities for a RT. It’s usually accompanied with a story like, “my husband is serving overseas, can I get a RT?!” Ugh. It kills me.

MILF Runner 3 years ago

This is pretty awesome. I promise not to do any of that shit. It’s all quite obnoxious. While I am obnoxious, I am not an asshole. I have a FB page with 10 likers…which surprises me but I’m not sure if I’m surprised that I have so few or that I have so many!

sarsm 3 years ago

So here’s the deal. I thought I was doing well with 89 likes on my FB like page. I live in oblivion, evidently.

I have seen some of the above like pages on FB and I never click on any of them. To be honest, they make me cringe.

You weren’t bitchy, her request was impolite.

Esther 3 years ago

You’re awesome!!

Tonya 3 years ago

Facebook is such a bitch sometimes. Thank you for tellin’ it like it is.

gigi 3 years ago

Why would I get GOOD content on FB when I can watch people post “my toddler crapped her pants” on their FB page and somehow THAT’s worthy of like 700 likes. *eyeroll*

Roshni 3 years ago

I’m really astounded at the rudeness of the second person (I think there were two people posting in that conversation)! Not sure what type of environment she’s in, but it’s just amazing to see how freely she uses foul language on someone she doesn’t even know!!

RachRiot 3 years ago

Stop it! I’m gonna tinkle! 😀

Buffy 3 years ago

I didn’t know that there was such a thing as selling your page these days, or sponsored likes or whatever. Scary Mommy…educational AND funny. Oh and it’s YOUR PAGE, so I say feel free to be bitchy or cunty any time you like. That’s kinda one of the things we love about you anyways.

Katie 3 years ago

I find asking someone you don’t know to “share” their page to be bitchy. But maybe that’s just old fart me.

Denise 3 years ago

That share for share stuff is dumb. I would feel like such an ass asking for someone to share my page because I shared theirs. And I would much prefer that someone share my page because they like my words and not because they want something.

Facebook is becoming such a pain in the ass. The few folks who do like my page don’t even get to see what I post most of the time. I feel skeevy enough when I post a someecard even if I think it is funny because it feels like a desperate attempt to get noticed.

People should Like because they want to and everyone should see everything from pages they Like. We all should not have to play these games.

Kristin @ What She Said 3 years ago

Wow, Amanda Davis and Shannen Hazen are quite the sanctimonious pair, aren’t they? I thought you were pretty polite, actually. Not rude or bitchy in the least. Calling someone a cunt, on the other hand? Klassy.

I can’t stand it when someone writes on my page, “Hey, followed you! Make sure you follow me back!” Um, no… I follow (and share) the pages I WANT to follow and share, not because you followed or shared mine. What, are we back in middle school?

As for the rest of these examples, I either ignore or hide the people who fall for them.

Anna 3 years ago

How ’bout the link in the first comments move? There is nothing I want to read badly enough to click the link in the first comment. NOTHING. (Also: I am really, really lazy.)

Jennifer 3 years ago

You weren’t being bitchy. You were being a grown up. Period.

Katia 3 years ago

Hard to believe that Facebook stands behind such blatant exploitation. How is it possibly OK to steal someone’s identity, a child at that, or to announce a public or private figure’s death and get away with it? Wow, Facebook.

Lady Estrogen 3 years ago

Facebook became a cesspool about 5’ish years ago.
It’s even caused family feuds in my life — mainly because I suggest a Facebook intervention when I see a family member being a fool — and then suddenly I am the bitch. Sigh.
Fine. They can all be fools and I’ll unfollow their embarrassing, passive-aggressive status updates as if they’re only 13. I just can’t look or “like” anything anymore.
Double sigh.

Shannan 3 years ago


Jenni P. 3 years ago

Hmm makes me wonder if I would be a total douche if I listed on my facebook that I will de-friend anyone whose feeds if these show up in my news. It’s annoying and people have no idea how stupid they’re being when they repost this crap.

Meagan Francis 3 years ago

Usually I just ignore when people post spammy stuff on my wall – it always annoys me but I can’t figure out how exactly to respond. I might have to try this tactic instead. Ha!

Jenni Chiu @ MommyNaniBooboo 3 years ago

Yes! I wrote once about those awful “like if you hate cancer” posts… because they seriously keep me up at night – I either feel guilty or duped.
Also, so not out of line on the S4S response. Usually people don’t get their panties in a bunch like that unless they know on some level they’ve been called out for something unsavory.

Leigh Ann 3 years ago

You mean I’m NOT going to get $5000 from Bill Gates for sharing a photo of Bill Gates holding a sign that he is indeed going to give me $5000??? Curses!

molly 3 years ago

As a blogger who has very slowly gained followers – I can say that I would never do something shady like this. No matter HOW bad I want FB likes. I would rather have genuine readers like my page than random people who have never even visited my blog or to win a bra giveaway or something.

Robin | Farewell, Stranger 3 years ago

I don’t read that as bitchy at all. And I might send this to certain people because OMG people – STOP!!

Corey Feldman 3 years ago

I’m sorry, apparently my language failed me. I was referring to posting a link on someone’s wall to promote yourself is spammy. which is I believe one of the examples she gave.

Carol Wells-Perlaky 3 years ago

I wonder when the kids, in the 1 million likes and Dad says we can get a puppy pic, will realize Daddy was hoping he picked an unreachable number .. (psst, kids! In other words, Daddy was really saying “No”.)

Carol Wells-Perlaky 3 years ago

I don’t think it is rude to share a link to a page or site you like without asking the person first if you could share the link. I do think it is rude to try to guilt trip to sharing a link back “in exchange” for you liking their page/site to begin with. I also think it is ruder yet, if the other person doesn’t respond &/or doesn’t agree to share a link back for the original person to delete the link – it lets observant readers know the person was only sharing it for another reason all along.

Genevieve 3 years ago

Good stuff and spot on! (Now please ‘like’ my comment:)

Sandra 3 years ago

It just means you’re an even greater celebrity than we already knew you were. I see it all that time on celebrity Twitter feeds: Please say ‘hi!’ to me today Beyonce!!! Yes, you are that awesome (I like Beyonce by the way, and all I wanted was a quick ‘hello’) :)

Charlotte 3 years ago

So much LIKE for this. THANK YOU. And YIKES! That last FB exchange kind of made my creep meter fly off the wall.

Carol Wells-Perlaky 3 years ago

Like, for real, if the baby got x amount of likes, Mommy and Daddy would agree to having another baby so s/he could be a brother or sister … as we kinda know Mommy & Daddy, by sharing the pic, is really saying, “We’re trying for another!”

Carol Wells-Perlaky 3 years ago

At first it sounded like the others were trying to take the moral ground, then slipped a rung with throwing out “bitch” … then slid down the rest of the way by casually throwing out “cunt” to insult someone they didn’t agree with. I sometimes get a kick out of watching people unable to “agree to disagree” online; sorry, but I do because it’s like watching a verbal train wreck that’s going to happen as you know one side or the other is going to slip back to grade school antics (name-calling, cheap shots/insult attempts, et al). I don’t think they realize how it looks/sounds to others until a few months pass by and they happen to read that thread again.

On the other hand, I always feel weird clicking Like to someone sharing about a loss of a loved one or a personal struggle …but I have no words sometimes, too … so I Like the unpleasant news to let the other person know, “Yes, I read your post.” At least that is how I hope they perceive me, and others, clicking Like.

Shell 3 years ago

I hate those like to give us a puppy or baby or whatever. Just do whatever you want to do, don’t be a fb famewhore about it.

And the S4S stuff is annoying. I do share a fanpage a day- I actually go through a list and schedule them out(otherwise, I’d forget) and I hate when someone gets irritated with me for not sharing their page on the very first day they happen to visit.

Megan 3 years ago

Posting links is brilliant! I think I’m going to start doing that!

Megan 3 years ago

Yes!! Thank you!!! What concerns me is my seemingly-otherwise-somewhat-intelligent friends and family that fall for this shit. What the hell are they thinking? Facebook has deteriorated slowly over the last couple years but it seems to have taken a distinct nosedive since they went public. It’s a shame, it used to be so fun and useful for connecting with people.

Kim Hornsby 3 years ago

Funny Stuff! Must retweet now.

Jamie 3 years ago

I just discovered this site today and I am in LOVE. You got called a cunt on the internet for no reason. You are my idol. I’ve only been called a bitch at worst, now I feel like I have some work to do.

Julie the Wife 3 years ago

A-effing-men to this. I’m SO tired of the “whore yourself out to get a like!” business. If I like someone’s blog or page, I like. If they like mine, they should like. At the end of the day, I want to know every liker on my page came the Sally Field way, and not because I negotiated their love like a hooker. Bravo to you.

Allen @ Funny Baby Videos 3 years ago

Super cool post. I like the edge that you have. It’s a controlled chaos.

Nina 3 years ago


Those spammy posts on Facebook (like when someone posts ON our walls) is sort of like those obnoxious direct messages on Twitter that are all “visit my blog, read my book, etc.”) You just can’t get through to people who do not understand what it truly means to build an audience and engage that audience. I can only imagine the amount of FB posts people try to display on your wall considering how BIG your following is. I get them, and I’m like an ant. Oy! That you responded to her at all was generous.

Crystal 3 years ago

You are one of the very few leading female bloggers who not only cares about people in her community, but goes out of her way to promote them as well. Fuck spammers. Fuck S4-whatever. You’re in a different league and always will be. You were honest, not bitchy.

Amanda S 3 years ago

I love that I can still see Amanda Davis’ name and that other chicks too…..Nothing says letting the world know about being an uptight bitch like social networking/blogging. I MIGHT just go check her out, that kind of bitchness deserves at least a once over….Like that top at catos that ended up looking horrible on you.

Corey Feldman 3 years ago

It is pretty rude when someone posts a link to your page without talking to you about it first. BTW you can totally read the names under the blackout.

Kelly @ In the Mom Light Blog 3 years ago

Ok, so I have like 1/1,000 the amount of people following me as you do, and I get enough spammy requests to drive me batty; thus, I can’t imagine how much you get!

Anyone that follows you knows you’re quite a nice and generous person, and the opposite of a bitch!

Besides, people that drop spam everywhere are like the guy who sells meat door to door out of the back of his truck – not exactly a legit way to do business my friend, sorry.

Marilize 3 years ago

Amen! I’m pretty closely guarded on my personal FB page adn treat my business page with respect. I love this article and shared accordingly. I don’t know anyone that does this, but I’m sure my friends do and this will be a not so subtle hint :)

Have you encountered the fly-by advertising on your wall yet? Where another company just comes to your page to plop their brand on there with an ad / a link? No permission asked – they just hop on to it. Thank goodness for delete and ban.

Love your blog :)

My Half Assed Life 3 years ago

I haven’t encountered that last item yet, but I’ve seen all of the other ones on my personal page. I just scroll right on by them.

Debbie 3 years ago

Thank for the information. When it comes to the social media sites, just when i get things figured out they change them. i completely agree with you. Why does everyone have to abuse good things.

Have to admit my Pinterest was set up wrong. Think I have it fixed now. As for some using the C word. I have some liquid soap for there tongue. To bad there mother didn’t think of that years ago.
Have a great day.

chimomwriter 3 years ago

Ah, I love #5. The initial post could be chalked up as a green mistake, but then the commentary that accompanies it… Good lord. These days, you create a page and you apparently get an Entitlement Badge to go with it.

Thanks for the laugh today!

Lollie ~ The FortuitousHousewife 3 years ago

I hate how all these types of posts clutter up my newsfeed, forcing me to skim down to find anything “real” – recently I’ve missed some fairly significant posts ’cause they couldn’t be heard thru all the noise.

Kelta 3 years ago

Oh no! I really hope I’m not doing this. I totally agree with all you’ve said, but is it the same if I have a small home business and I share the link on my own profile and ask people to share to drum up business? I really hope I’m not annoying people. My business is VERY small and this is the only way I know to get the word out. Yes, people like the page, but don’t often think to share it unless I ask them to in the same status. I never think to share a business’s page even after I liked it unless they ask me to. Hmmm…I really hope this isn’t the same thing. I would hate to think I’m becoming one of those groups described above.

Kerri (TheMaven) 3 years ago

One more thing, maybe you should have told her, to post a picture of her holding a sign that says “If I can get 1,000,000 likes, Scary Mommy will share my page!” 😉

Tara L 3 years ago

Just wanted to give you a heads up that even though you blocked out her name…..for some reason I can still see it and the names of her pages.

Kerri (TheMaven) 3 years ago

I just had a I’ll show you yours if you show you mine moment.

I get comments like that on my wall too. I delete and block. Maybe I should be snarky instead.

Ariana 3 years ago

I wish I knew how to find some kind of acceptable protocol on this. I will plead guilty to commenting on someones FB page and linking one of my blog posts. In fact, I felt guilty when I did it, realizing that I totally pimped myself on their page. If however, I was called out on it, I would have simply apologized and not done it again. Thanks for this post!

Ann 3 years ago

Well said! Thank you!

Jen 3 years ago

“Oh, you liked a facebook page because you hate cancer? That should cure it…” LOL!! & so true. If you want to make a change, “liking” a page or picture on Facebook isn’t going to change it.
I can’t imagine basing my decision on how many likes a picture or page gets. My husband & I will decide whether or not we are having any more children, thanks. & there is no way I would let my children get a pet, or get to do or not do something based on the number of likes they get. It’s something that we’d discuss as a family. (They’re too young for Facebook yet, but still.)
In your response I only read a little bit of snark , which I thought was fine, especially considering the source. I didn’t think your response was rude. That person, however, holy crap, Batman! Really ridiculous, if you ask me.
I love reading your posts, & those who guest post. I almost always get a good chuckle. :)

Jessica Smock 3 years ago

This is exactly why Facebook annoys me, and Twitter doesn’t. I did start a Facebook group for my blog, but have done nothing with it. Yes, people can be really annoying on Twitter, but, as a beginner to Twitter, I’m finding that the people that I follow (and who follow me) drive me much less crazy.

Dipaola momma 3 years ago

Bitch? Really? Oh if they only knew 😉

Sharebear 3 years ago

Wow! Didn’t you just pimp out your website the same way? Dog smells itself first?

Regardless, I do love your website and can relate to many things you and your contributors write about.

And thank you for this information, I did not know that you can sell something for getting a “like” ratio.

Scary Mommy 3 years ago

I formally absolve you of all Facebook guilt. Poof!

Scary Mommy 3 years ago

Yeah, would have been more fun to not blur it out, but I’ve got some standards. :)


Scary Mommy 3 years ago

Awwww, thanks. It’s completely frustrating, though. There was that stupid Crock Pot Girls site last year that popped up out of nowhere and in a week had millions of fans. It drove me CRAZY.

Tara 3 years ago

I don’t think you are any of the things she called you, especially the “c” word, that is just down right nasty. I have to agree w/ everyone that FB has gone to hell, it’s a place to connect with old school friend or family members. I had read a post last month on here that Jackie Chan had died, I’m like holy crap really, than I read later that it wasn’t true at all, who the hell puts these things on here to say these actors are dead, they should be a shamed of themselves and I think these actors who are “supposedly dead” should do something and find the person/people who did this and charge them or something, it’s just getting ridculous on how far these people are wanting likes for something. Like the first pic, like and you will have a baby…really get your head out of your ass!!!!

Scary Mommy 3 years ago

I usually just hide them, but it’s become so out of control that I couldn’t NOT say something. She has since deleted the post, so maybe she actually learned something? Maybe?

Twyla Norris 3 years ago

Thank you for having the guts to say what a lot of us feel…I can’t stand these either. Particularly the “if we get 1000000 likes, we can get a dog”. Does getting so many likes mean you will be able to take care of a dog? Hmmmm, instead of wasting your time, trying to get likes on facebook, maybe you should research how much work a dog is and decide if you can properly care for it. Unfortunatley, this has been going on for a long time. I am supposed to fall into 100 wells and die by now for not forwarding emails!

Heather B 3 years ago

Up the bitchiness! That crazy s4s poster deserves a good ole bitch slap!

In the words of the great Tina Fey, bitches get things done. Scary Mommy is one awesome bitch! Viva the bitch!

mommagem 3 years ago

There is one thing you forgot to mention and that these like this or your evil pages are in fact a form of peer pressure and guess what it’s Bullying I thought that the whole big push right now was against bullying? DRIVES ME CRAZY to see so many Hypocritical people out there. The one’s that get me the most are the click like if your against bullying if you don’t then you’re heartless…. *sigh.

Liz 3 years ago

Oh man I feel you on this one. It just reminds me of all those chain letters people used to send via email. And how about the status updates that are like “Let’s see who cares enough about Jesus/cancer/their mom/etc. to post this as a status update for one hour!” and then goes on about who knows what. Hate those too.

And I just had to say something about that last bullet. I mean, who whips out the C-word for something so petty? So you wouldn’t share her page. Big deal. But name calling? Totally disrespectful. Stay classy, lady. Stay classy.

Scary Mommy 3 years ago

It’s hard, because as much as I DON’T want to get caught up in Facebook numbers, it’s by far the number one referrer on my site, so it does matter. As with all social media, I’d say quality over quantity really does win the race. Even if it doesn’t always feel like it.

Jen 3 years ago

Holy cow. A girl eating a used tampon?? Real or not, yuck!! (I just lost my appetite reading that.) I agree that it is awful that kids are asking for likes to do stupid things. Sometimes I wonder what the world is coming to.

Scary Mommy 3 years ago

Those are just plain depressing.

Scary Mommy 3 years ago

I think I followed Jess Watson to your place this morning and that post had me cracking up! Loved it!!

Tiffany 3 years ago

As many others have said I don’t think you were being “bitchy” my favorite “likes” are Like if you love Jesus or keep scrolling to burn in hell. I mean really all this is are the chain letters digitalized!!!
First time commenting but just wanted to let you know I Love your blogs and I read them as often as possible, and they usually make me laugh which is hard to not do considering I usually read this while at work!

Life with Kaishon 3 years ago

Oh my gosh. So freaking hilarious. I don’t think you were #*(chy at all. That girls is crazy.

Scary Mommy 3 years ago

The odds? Pretty much none. But we can try.

Scary Mommy 3 years ago

I WAS a tad bitchy, but she definitely took it to the next level!

Scary Mommy 3 years ago

Well, now there are sponsored likes and posts which is a whole other issue. I’d say ignore anything that doesn’t come directly from someone you know. :)

Scary Mommy 3 years ago

THAT drives me crazy.

Chris PM 3 years ago

Oh you are so right on! Sometimes I just contemplate chucking the whole Facebook thing. It can all seem so superficial….and a total time-suck that can mess with your emotions if you let it. (like…so-and-so unfriended me, because I “liked” such and such?) So, do we now have a new cultural understanding of the meaning of “like” now that FB has kinda stolen the context of the word? Sheesh…

MarySunshine 3 years ago

I’m the asshole who posts half snarky comments when friends and family post “Like if…” crap on FB.
“Like if you support our military overseas!” You know what that shit gets? It gets a link to my favorite adopt a soldier organization, and “If you want to truly support our military overseas consider adopting a soldier and writing enters, or doing a one time group care package.”
“Like if you hate cancer and want it to disappear!” That BS gets a link to donate to cancer research and, when I was still teaching, a link to donate to the Relay for Life team my coworkers and I were on
I won’t even touch the “My dad said I can have a sparkly unicorn that shits rainbows and farts perfume if I get bazillion likes of this picture of me kicking windows.”

Chain letters are stupid, too. They were when people still wrote them by hand. They were when they moved to emails. Still dumb on MySpace and just as dumb on FaceBook.

Can you tell this struck a nerve? LOL

Amy @mommetime 3 years ago

love, love this post!!!!

Back during the holidays I had a photo contest on my blog and my Facebook page… it was fun –I heart photography; there was no drama, so I decided to have another one. Someone using one of those stooooooopid vote trading crap schemes on Facebook found out about my little contest; I got a bunch of likes from it, which totally gave me that creepy you just bought a like feeling.

In an attempt to redeem myself, I posted my FACEBOOK sell-out sin confession because that is the LAST way I want to gain a like on my ‘lil page… fortunately, I put a disclaimer on the contest, because there is always a possibility of that one person, so I kicked the picture out of the contest and notified the participant.

See I’m still feeling bad; I’m over here telling you ALL about my business… GAH!

Sometimes ya just have to live and learn.

Kristy 3 years ago

Oh great! You mean every time I hit like on one of those pictures that I was actually liking a page and not just the pictures? Guess I need to go check out my FB and clean it up. (sigh)

Melanie 3 years ago

Awesome list :) And no you weren’t out of line for the S4S comment.

The other day one of my friends on FB liked a post that said something along the lines of “put your finger on this dot and then press like…something magical will happen!” nothing happened, obviously….the damn thing had over 2000 likes!!! insane…

The 5th Level of Motherhood

Shanna 3 years ago

So funny and so true! Love this, you bitch! Hee hee

Melissa 3 years ago

The all-time worst ones are the pics of abused kids that says “LIKE if you hate child abuse”, an your stupid friends “like” it and then that shit shows up all over your news feed. WTF. I went off on my friends for liking that shit. News flash: everyone hates child abuse, “liking” a picture of it is just completely moronic, I can’t even stand it.

Danielle Smith 3 years ago

I love everything about this AND YOU. All of the things you mention have ZERO to do with building a community and everything to do with trolling for numbers. Numbers don’t equate to any kind of quality. Your community continues to come back because they trust you to provide quality content…to engage with them.

As for your exchange on that last one – you responded politely… the fact that it instantly devolved to name-calling (And horrendous name-calling at that) on her end is both immature and a sign that she has zero understanding of the space. Also? You were kind to block her name…it would be fun to see that she doesn’t exist around here within a year. Her tactics won’t allow for it.


Jean Parks 3 years ago

You are a LOT nicer than I am, I’d have deleted that request on my wall & ignored it, possibly blocking that person. Sorry such unpleasantness occurred on your wall.

Teresa 3 years ago

Good advice! It annoys me to see those, too. My relatives always repost things and “like” those pages of people “needing our help” and hoaxes and everything, and it does me NO GOOD to tell me it’s a hoax because they do it again 10 minutes later.

Beth Nelson 3 years ago

I totally agree!! I just posted a comment a few weeks ago that if you are someone who lets faceless strangers make decisions for you such as buying a puppy, getting engaged, or having another child by clicking “Like” on FB, you’ve probably just shown that you’re not stable enough for said puppy/spouse/baby.

Facebook started out as a good idea, but it’s become absolutely ridiculous. It would be nice if people had to pass a basic intelligence test to use it, and it would be GREAT if FB would have some sort of “instant fact-checker” software which would prevent people from posting and forwarding random crap that simply. isn’t. true. Ah, but there I go dreaming again.

Sarah 3 years ago

Here’s another question–what are the S4S spammers hoping to really achieve? The only way to build a real audience is to constantly provide excellent content. Like you do, Jill!

Good guys (and girls) win. They really do!

Guerrilla Mom 3 years ago

LIKE MY PAGE OR ROT IN HELL! I just spit up coffee all over myself – thank you very much!

Jessica 3 years ago

Love this article. Everything you said was absolutely on point!

TBag 3 years ago

I have been attempting to figure out the “secret” to get likes and followers for a bit with no luck. I haven’t resorted to the vain satisfaction of pleading for likes with something like these listed….luckily!! I suppose it will all come in due time though!!
Keep up the good work Scary Momma’s!

Kate@zMOMbie 3 years ago

If I didn’t wanted lose touch with some of my friends and family, I would totally have quit FB a long time ago. I am so annoyed by the constant stream of like-seeking on my newsfeed. I went on a tirade once about how I want to know what “you guys are actually up to” and not just what crap you’ve decided to like. And, no, you were not a bitch.

Jaimee 3 years ago

I so agree with you! As the mum of a little girl with Down syndrome it makes me so mad when I see those ‘Mallory’ stories, my daughter couldn’t give a hoot wether anybody thinks she’s ugly she knows that she’s amazing! and she really doesn’t think about trivial nonsense like that, I find it so absolutely awful now that children are asking for likes to do stupid things my son who’s 13 and only just allowed on Facebook told me about a girl eating a used tampon on YouTube and wether its real or not it’s such an awful thing especially when their future boss googles them for a new job in a few years time. It’s such a shame they cant go back to just being children :(

Carol 3 years ago

The person who insulted you in more ways than one for you actually responding to their spammy request? Let me jut say, I think you were very nice because usually, what I do on my site’s FB page is delete all links that any one else posted on my page without request about their page or links. And? I completely ignore anyone’s request to share anything of theirs unless they are someone who I have connected with on more than just one occasion, and I know, or I follow, or have had interactions with beyond the request. So, I think that the fact that you even responded makes you a much nicer person than most, certainly much nicer than me. And? Anyone who goes around insulting people like that not only deserves to be completely blocked and banned, but also seek therapy. That went from 0 to hostile rage.

Ann 3 years ago

Every time I see children holding up these signs for “likes” I feel so sick for them. Having thousands of strangers looking at my children is the last thing on Earth I’d ever want.

Stars 3 years ago

So are we scary bitches now? Honestly I like it! 😀

Leah 3 years ago

A-Friggen-MEN! All the ‘like if’ ‘share if’ bullshit is annoying! Rock on Scary Mommy!

Jenny Squawk 3 years ago

Lately, I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I don’t know what you posted was bitchy at all. Maybe a tad snarky, but I love snark. It was full communication, straight, no bull, but for some reason that makes a woman a b_tch and a c_nt? Are you kidding me?

Jamie @ Love Bakes Good Cakes 3 years ago

Hahahaha! This is great :) Too bad for the person who obviously needs to get a clue (and a life) about sharing pages. Smh … I will never understand some people – I just delete, mark as spam or ban them from my page!

Kristen Mae 3 years ago

I can’t believe people still fall for that “like and watch what happens” crap. I have a cousin who falls for it every. single. time. and I just want to slap her upside the head with a pork chop. WAKE UP, ya dink!

On the other hand… What are your feelings about Facebook being a greedy whoremonger? (This isn’t in question, is it?) I’m a little nobody with less than 500 likes on my FB page… I really try to post only quality material, though I know that more frequent posting can lead to more activity/more likes. As you mentioned, for people who are trying to build a community, it’s pretty discouraging.

jeannine 3 years ago


Rhondda Mol 3 years ago

Someone had a very public temper tantrum. It astounds me people feel they can say whatever they want on the internet – without consequence. I believe words should be selected carefully and we should edit ourselves before we hit “Submit” or “enter”.

There really is a time and place for everything and those ‘negative’ feelings and words should have been communicated to you ‘privately’ rather than posted on a public page for everyone to see.

Perhaps I am just getting old. Where has common courtesy gone?

It was very bad manners and shows a lot of immaturity to attack you in such a manner.

On a more positive note, I look forward to your blog feed everyday. Thank you for providing such a wonderful and supportive community.

Amanda 3 years ago

I’m so sick of the “like my pic” or “like & share to win” crap. I just wanna stalk, er, keep in touch with people…

Sarah 3 years ago

Oh, yes. Yes to all five of these items. My feed is inundated these days.

Nikki Noodle 3 years ago

The best are the ones that say “someone won the lottery and wants to give a random stranger who likes the post one million dollars”…smh…c’mon people, get a clue!!

RachRiot 3 years ago

Could not have said it better myself. Those pleas for “likes” make me stabby. The “share for share” thing is icky, too. Some of us are just writing away, trying to get noticed the old-fashioned way– by earning it. I want to thank you, Jill, for leaving a comment on my little blog. I feel like Oprah just gave me a shout-out. I almost crapped my pants. You made my month!! :)

Katie Knapp 3 years ago

LOVE IT!!! I hate seeing all over the place about the “like this” bs… You certainly weren’t a bitch at all to that person spamming your wall. It’s not only rude of them to do so, but to call you names.. wow…

Kristin Shaw (Two Cannoli)’ 3 years ago

Amen, Jill. And THANK YOU!
I don’t understand online rudeness at all – it’s the coward’s way of shaking her fist and running away. I’d rather people like my page because they like me and my writing, and not because I coerced them to do so. You’re right on target. Hopefully, the ones who need to listen will do so (what are the odds?)

Stephanie 3 years ago

What? WHAT?? I can’t even BELIEVE that person! Someone asked me to S4s last week and I didn’t even know what that meant. I just ignored it. No, people. It doesn’t work that way. If I ENJOY READING WHAT YOU WRITE, I will share it. That’s how it works.

Facebook is seriously aggravating and useless lately.

Aimee 3 years ago

Great post. I am completely sick of all of the things you mentioned. And, I hate the extra guilt I get when I don’t like something that says, “Like if you want to cure cancer.” sigh

Shannon 3 years ago

Well said. What the hell happened to FB? I liked your page because I think you’re funny as hell. I’m not looking to get anything out of it. Just sitting back and giggling when I realize, while reading your posts, that someone else “gets me”.

Sara 3 years ago

There is a huge difference between bitchy and honest. People just see things the way they want to when things don’t go how their way. Keep on being your “bitchy” self, Jill!!! :)

Jacki McHale 3 years ago

She totally deserved it. It it totally spammy to just ask like that. And as for calling you a cunt… she may need to look in the mirror.
She deserved the “bitchiness” because she was dumb enough not to use her common sense on that one.

Damn I love Scary Mommy this early in the morning.
Have a great weekend!
JCat McGack

Miranda Leigh 3 years ago

you were nicer than I probably would have been. create a page/blog I enjoy and ill share on my own.

Sara 3 years ago

I thought the same thing! Obviously the person writing to her was young and immature to just jump right to the C-word!

Tracie 3 years ago

I don’t think you were at all bitchy toward that person. And she took it WAY past bitchy in her response to you.

Mama Melch 3 years ago

I can’t believe someone had the audacity to use the C-word when describing you! Facebook has turned into a carnival ride and I’m getting over the spinning HS-esque naive gullible BS. Well said!

Janet Nuckolls 3 years ago

Well, color me happy. I just discovered Scary Mommy (you can thank How To Blog a Book site). My daughters talked me into creating a Facebook page, and while I’m glad I did because I’ve heard from family and old friends I’d lost touch with, I’m honest enough to admit I’m not exacting sure how it works. Why do those *like* Target, *like* world peace, thingys pop up? Do they really come from my friends? I just admitted I’d lost touch with some who’ve sent me those irritating requests…so maybe they’ve changed in ways I don’t understand (like they have time to waste) or is it happening by mistake? So many unanswered questions having to do with Facebook. I feel five again, sometimes; )

Beth M 3 years ago

Fabulous! Well said…as usual.

Brittany 3 years ago

As you know, I can’t even see what you post and I subscribe to you and you can’t see me and you do and I actually really like you and all I see is crap for the most part. So, I am SO with you.

Alison 3 years ago

I love you, Jill, you always tell it as it is!

And I don’t think you were out of line with your response with the S4S comment – after all, you were not the one who called anyone a cunt. (just typing that C word made me shudder)

I never understand how people who don’t seem to get any blog readers/ comments, have thousands of FB likes but no interaction on there. Do they er, buy fans?