Parenting

Woman's Movie Theatre Hack For Sneaking Snacks In Is Damn Genius

by Julie Scagell
Image via David Saium / EyeEm

This snack hack is a movie goer’s dream

Sneaking food into a movie theater is a time-honored tradition dating back to the beginning of time — or at least to the beginning of movie theaters. By the time you buy a small popcorn, some kind of candy, and a vat of Diet Coke, you’ve spent half a mortgage payment, so why the heck not? But where does one hide it all without getting busted?

One brilliant woman has it all figured out.

Jessica Ruiz Gonzalez posted a now viral picture last week that’s the answer to our snack-sneaking prayers. She took herself to Joann Fabrics and bought a Styrofoam “belly.” “Thought of a new way to bring more snacks into the movies,” Gonzalez writes in her post. “And if y’all try it I’d love to see videos or pictures.”

She posted pictures of herself with her new pregnant snack belly and judging by the photos, Gonzalez looks to be about five or six Milk Dud boxes along. Simply fill your second trimester bump bowl with all your favorite goodies, tuck your food baby underneath your shirt, and voila, you’ve got yourself a movie’s worth of snacks.

This woman is a damn genius.

Of course, this new trick may not work if you’re already with child or a man but otherwise, if you’re a person that likes to go to a movie with family or friends and not go broke, this may just be the answer. It seems the internet agrees:

Possibly not for this dude though:

All movie theaters have signs posted saying something to the effect of, “Don’t you dare even think about bringing outside food in because we like to price gouge without the threat of competition.” Some theaters will actually even go as far as checking purses and bags to make sure movie-goers are abiding by their rules. But there’s no employee on the planet who’s going to frisk a pregnant lady — if they’d like to continue living, that is.

The only possible snafu in Gonzalez’s plan is if anyone recognizes her after the movie because it’s unclear how one explains how they gave birth without anyone noticing and then aren’t leaving the theatre with an actual baby. But hey, those are minor details in the grand scheme of things and there’s no rules saying you can’t just stash the empty bump back under your shirt and beat a hasty retreat as the credits roll.

Movie theaters beware: There’s about to be a gaggle of “pregnant” women flocking to theaters across the country. Don’t mess with us. We’re hungry, we have storage space, we’re armed with chocolate, and we’re coming for you.