Perfect for our delicate lady hands
Cards Against Humanity is cashing in on what the makers of pens, deodorant, razors and apparel have known for years — that you can slap “for her” on a product, turn it pink, and automatically charge more. But CAH’s use of “the pink tax” is actually a good thing.
And a totally hilarious thing.
The makers of our favorite party game for horrible people announced today that they’re issuing a new set of cards called Cards Against Humanity for Her. They’re careful to let us know that the product inside is the exact same thing they already sell in a black box — only it’s pink and costs an extra $5. Because of course it does.
As the company says, they’re “so adorable.”
On their website, they really sell it to us womenfolk with a sales pitch that millions of dollars in marketing research suggests we can’t resist. “Everyone hates it when the men retire to the parlor to discuss the economy and the various issues of today. What are us ladies supposed to do?”
Buy a super cute game made to go with our favorite delicate lady beverages, that’s what.
A game that fits right in with all our other overpriced pink shit. Like, tell me I’m not the only one who makes a habit of carrying a plastic pink banana and pretend pink butterflies along with all my other necessities.
They really appeal to our emotional side, which is obviously every side, because women be crazy, right?
As CAH so helpfully points out to our simple lady brains, “It’s trendy, quirky, and only takes minutes for us ladies to understand. The cards are soft and won’t slip out of your hands. Perfect for Margarita Nights!”
Phew. Wouldn’t want to break a nail.
It’s the party game we can count on — no matter what.
It might even make us more attractive and youthful-looking!
CAH provides a totally helpful Q&A to ease us into understanding why we should pay more money for the same exact product, only pink. For example, why is it $5 more? “Because we’re worth it.” Duh.
Even if you already own the original version of the game, CAH makes a compelling case for why you should shell out $30 to buy it all over again — only pink. “Treat yourself! Say yes to the dress. Find the best color to wear for your skin tone. Stay in with the girls.”
Getting out my pink credit card as we speak. Not even kidding, my credit card is bright pink. They really know their audience!
In case you’re not yet convinced, their final go at selling you on this perfectly feminine item is hard to say no to. “It’s adorable. It’s cute. Self-care. Take time for yourself. Chia bowl. Perfect on your coffee table or bookshelf. Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen. Brunch. Cheat day. Nasty women. Yaaaaaaaas queen! Good vibes only. Activated charcoal. Gender Reveal Party. Avocado face peels. You’re such a Miranda. Paleo.”
OK, by now, you’re either beyond aggravated or assuming there’s a catch. You can keep on being aggravated but the latter is correct — there’s a huge catch. An amazing one.
In a press release, the company explains the inspiration behind their “new” product. “We crunched the numbers, and to our surprise, we found that women buy more than 50 percent of games,” said Cards Against Humanity community director Jenn Bane. “We decided that hey, it’s 2017, it’s time for women to have a spot at the table, and nevertheless, she persisted. That’s why we made Cards Against Humanity for Her. It’s trendy, stylish, and easy to understand. And it’s pink.”
The most convincing selling point? “Women love the color pink,” says Bane.
Oh, and also? All profits are donated to the charity Emily’s List, a non-profit organization dedicated to getting pro-choice Democratic women elected to office.
See? You now have the perfect reason to treat yourself.
If you want to purchase this limited-edition set, it’s $30 and available on the CAH website where they’re also offering two new expansion packs of cards: the Weed Pack and the Period Pack, both $5.
Shut up and take our money. From our adorable pink wallets, of course.
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