Bride-to-be calls out trainer who body-shamed her
If you’re a woman who happens to move through the world with a little more weight than society thinks is “okay,” you’ve probably experienced body shaming at one time or another. For some reason, many people feel entitled to comment on the way we look — even though we never asked their damn opinion, or care what it may be.
Cassie Young, a newly-engaged radio host in Atlanta recently received a very “helpful” text from a fitness trainer, in regards to her upcoming nuptials. She shared the exchanged on her social media channels, because it’s truly amazing.
“This guy reached out to me on Twitter with a pitch, and it spiraled into something else,” she begins her post, describing the exchange. “I’m posting this because I want every woman and man to know that it does not MATTER what you look like. In the above exchange, the trainer is in grey, and Young’s remarks are in blue.
“Congratulations on your engagement,” the trainer benignly begins. “Hire me to get you in shape for your wedding.”
Record scratch. Say what?
“I am in shape! Thank you so much for your offer, though,” Young replies, which is a way nicer response than he deserved. But, he doubles down on an asshole with his next text.
“I know you want to look your best on your wedding day,” total stranger trainer who does not even know her replies. “If you don’t hire me, hire someone. Those pictures lasts [sic] centuries. You want your best you.”
This last text makes me want to go all mother-of-dragons on a trainer. It really does. Who the hell does this guy think he is? Young somehow completely maintained her composure and responded.
“I know it’s probably hard for you to understand this, but it’s taken me a long time to love my body. I’m constantly shamed or reminded that I’m heavy and I should be embarrassed — or people are embarrassed for me — or just straight up rude, calling me ‘disgusting.’ I’ve battled past all that and like how I look,” she wrote.
“I’ve worked really hard at accepting my self-worth and disassociating the idea that my weight is a direct correlation to my value as a person or how much people will like me. And I found someone who loves me no holds barred — just the way I am, thus proving that true.”
The myth that our worth is directly related to the size of our waistlines is exhausting. It certainly isn’t true. And how dare a professional in a field that is supposed to be about health make such wild assumptions — and frankly, be so goddamn rude.
No woman needs random douchebag trainer reminding her that she will be judged by her weight. We’re reminded every day. And freedom is finally being able to transcend that and appreciate ourselves for who we are — something Young has achieved.
But jerk trainer doesn’t stop.
Next he says, “You can accept how you look, but you can’t be happy with the way you look. You can’t lie to yourself.” Oh thanks, RANDOM MAN ON THE INTERNET. She somehow managed to deflect his nonsense for three more texts. You can scroll through the entire conversation in the Instagram post above.
Young posted an update to the trainer drama on her Instagram account today.
Fat-shaming trolls must have descended on her various posts, because she admits that they go to her a little. “Their comments didn’t hurt my feelings so much as stole my faith in the world. I was shocked that people could be SO cruel and SO nasty, and I wondered why we should even bother about fighting against this cold, biter, heartless Army Of The Dead,” she wrote. But she also acknowledged that the positive comments that flowed in help extinguish the nastiness.
“It doesn’t matter if you’re skinny or fat or between the two or willowy or broad shouldered or peer shaped or like a board or anything in between. You get good stuff in life by being YOU. That’s what matters.”