Dear Friend: You Are Enough

by Kara Lawler
Originally Published: 
A dark-haired woman wearing an apron while squeezing out chocolate topping on a muffin in a kitchen

Dear Friend,

I think you need to hear this today: You are enough. You are enough. You are enough. Can you take a deep breath and repeat this to me? I am enough. I am enough. I am enough.

You’re all your child needs. You’re all your partner needs. You’re all your friends need. You’re all your parents need. You’re all your siblings need. You’re all your job needs. You are a fantastic mother, partner, sister, daughter, friend, worker, and you are doing enough.

You are doing enough for your children – loving her, loving him, loving them. Your children are safe, healthy, and happy, and on days they aren’t, you do your best to make sure they are. We live in this day and age where we sometimes feel as if we are not enough and we’re not doing enough. We rush to play groups, music lessons, summer camps, dance lessons, baseball practice, and library outings. We feel guilty that we are not doing enough.

Is she eating enough good food? Did I breastfeed enough? Am I reading to him enough? Is the school he’s in enough? Did I say enough about how much I love her? Did I relay to him enough how important he is to us? Is he safe enough and ready enough to venture into the world without me? Is she sleeping enough? Are we traveling enough? Are we exposing them to enough? Is there enough money to get them all they need? Am I home enough? Am I present enough? Am I doing enough? Am I a good enough example?

We take classes to continue our own education; we are done with our schooling; we never continued our formal education at all. We work outside of the home full-time; we work part-time; we are stay-at-home moms. We help to care for our parents; we help our friends with their kids; we help even when maybe we shouldn’t. We make homemade bread; we make friends; we make enemies; we make jelly so our children have their favorite jam for their toast.

We speak with great thought; we speak without thinking; we speak too little; we speak too much. We mail presents; we mail letters; we mail bills. We plan board meetings; we plan Pinterest worthy birthday parties; we plan lessons; we plan for our futures. We rush to get our run in; we rush to work; we rush to the store. We attempt to have wine with friends; we attempt to get a shower in peace; we attempt to sit on our couch for just five minutes to read our book, started a month ago and never finished.

We try to put laundry away for days; we try to make it to our big presentation on time; we try to be supportive of our friends. We run houses; we run companies; we run ourselves into the ground. We are confident; we are strong; we are insecure; we are many things in many forms. All the while, there are some days, like today, when we feel like we’re not enough.

But, my friend. I know this: you are enough. Pass it on.

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