From The Confessional: The Field That Holds Our F*cks Is Barren This Winter

“Oh the weather outside is frightful…”

That’s it. No need for the rest of the song. It’s cold AF out there, your face hurts while you’re getting the mail, and your car doesn’t warm up until you pull into the parking lot of wherever you’re going.

Sorry Jon Snow, but winter isn’t coming. It’s here—at least for those of us in the North or Midwest anyway. It’s officially snow boots and winter hat season, and where I live, it doesn’t end until April.

And, for extra fun, we’re in a pandemic this winter, so germ fears are at an all-time high. And while yeah, COVID-19 means we leave the house less and brave frigid temps on fewer occasions, it also means being stuck inside more than ever, which can be problematic for our mental health as we all fight cabin fever.

So if you find yourself searching “houses for sale in southern California” every February and spew streams of obscenities every time you have to shovel your driveway at 6 a.m., we get it. Sure, fresh snowfalls are pretty. And yeah, the holidays are merry. But in a million other ways, the short days and long weeks of winter can really suck. And COVID-19 winters?! The woooooooorst.

Even in a non-pandemic year, one of the first things we think of as we approach winter is germs. Our family gets the stomach flu every damn winter and we pass it around like candy. Then add in an extra special mix of boogers and random, unexplained fevers, and well, yeah, winter in our house = weekly Walgreens trips and lots of disinfectant.

But this year is worse than ever. COVID means quarantine, which means nothing to look forward to. No big holiday get togethers, no visits with Santa, no school parties or neighborhood cookie swaps or holiday open houses. Just month after month of staring at the same family members we’ve been hunkered down with since March, reliving Groundhog Day for all eternity.

Stay-at-home parents face unique struggles in the winter, being cooped up with orangutan babies swinging from the chandeliers who endlessly spill orange juice on the kitchen floor. SAHPs need zoo trips and park visits and nature walks to help their kids burn energy so they’ll take those blessed naps. But in winter, several days might pass when a mom or dad cannot take their kids outside because of the cold or because it gets dark at like 3:00 in the freaking afternoon. And that can make for some of the darkest days of parenting (literally).

Some of us truly enjoy living in a place with all four seasons, but damn those winters can be long. So maybe after 10 straight subzero days in late January, we might find ourselves perusing real estate in Arizona… even if it’s just a dream to help warm up our chilly bones.

There are lots of reasons to hate winter—from parking restrictions to annoying spouses obsessing over the forecast to the fact that we look like lumberjacks in our 72 layers of winter gear.

But it doesn’t last forever. Eventually the sun stays out past 5 and the snowmen and icicles all melt and we stop getting frostbite when we put out the trash. Until then, hang in there. Make some hot tea, snuggle up for your 986th family movie, and read a book or do a puzzle. Spring will be here in a few months, along with (maybe? hopefully?) a vaccine, and then we can all emerge from hibernation, shave off our winter fur, and meet up at the park. Until then, we’ll be at home, under a blanket, and we’ll see you on Zoom.