Rituals

You Know What? Go Ahead And Set That Intention

I know it sounds silly, but you have to ask for what you want in life.

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Mom that asks the universe for things in the car wash.
Alejandra de la Fuente/Moment/Getty Images

I have this routine that all friends and family laugh at. Every morning I go to the gym, hit the drive-through for a soda, and then go through the car wash. Yes, it’s almost every day. And yes, I know it sounds silly and I know that you're wondering why in the world I would wash my car so often but... hear me out. I don’t just sit there while my car gets covered with suds. It’s so much more than that.

The car wash is where I sit and set my intentions for the day. It’s a ritual, and I don't let anything get in the way of it. Because I’ve found that when I sit there and decide what I want and send my request out into the universe, I’m much more likely to get it.

This is how it goes. First, I say aloud what I am thankful for. The car wash is a great place to do this, because no one can see or hear me. This is a very important part because even on the days when I’m feeling down and my mind goes to a negative place or something is bothering me, this makes me think of all the wonderful things in my life. I can literally feel my mind shift to a more positive place.

Then, I set a loose goal for myself. For years, my goals were about work. I love my job as a freelancer, but I don’t get paid if I don’t work and there’s a certain amount of money I need to make each month in order to live my life and take some time off. I’ve written that number in a bunch of places where I see it a lot, like the chalkboard in my kitchen and in my organizer. Every morning I say the amount of work I want to get for the week and I can honestly say it has never failed me. There have been times I’ve missed my goal but the next week I exceeded it.

Earlier this year, I told my kids I was ready to get another dog. Our family dog died six years ago, the same year as my divorce, and I thought about getting another one many times but was never quite ready. I told them I wanted to find an older Golden Retriever or GoldenDoodle to adopt. I knew it might be a long shot, but I set my intention one morning in the car wash and started looking online for a dog.

Within hours, my ex-husband — who didn’t even know I wanted another dog — sent my kids a picture of an eight-year-old Goldendoodle that needed a new home. The dog belonged to a childhood friend of his and because of a surgery, the owner couldn’t care for him any longer and was heartbroken about it. Long story short, I now have an adorable Goldendoodle.

I recently decided I was ready to start dating again after the end of a three-year relationship. It’s something I’d been thinking about but wasn’t one hundred percent committed to. Until I woke up one Monday morning and said, “I want to meet a man who is funny, great with my kids, handy around the house, lives close, and a bit of a homebody like me.”

The next day, I matched with someone on a dating site who lives 20 minutes away. We began chatting and agreed to meet. There was an instant connection and I laughed so much during our three-hour date my cheeks hurt. And one of the first things he said to me was that he could be quite a homebody and liked building things and doing things around his house.

While it is all still very new and we are getting to know each other, there is a comfort level with him I’ve never had before, and I’m excited to see what happens. And if it doesn’t work out, then at least the proof that The Universe listened to everything I asked for is enough to make me keep putting exactly what I want out there.

You have to ask for what you want. Not just by putting it out into the world, but also by doing the work to get it and asking to let other people know your standard. You don’t have to do it while going through the carwash with a caffeinated beverage in your hand... but there is a huge part of me that thinks that’s all part of the secret formula.

Diana Park is a writer who finds solitude in a good book, the ocean, and eating fast food with her kids.

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