It’s really no secret that moms are the magic behind the holiday season. From shopping, wrapping, and organizing gifts, to baking the cookies for Santa and scheduling out some holiday fun activities, moms are the ones who are typically at the helm when it comes to making the holiday season memorable. So, what happens when that becomes an absolutely thankless job?
TikTok user @missmear, aka Mary, decided to share her disappointment after she was left empty-handed on Christmas morning. In a six-second clip, Mary shared her heartbreak about how much the holidays can suck when you’re an under-appreciated mom. Not surprisingly, the TikTok took off and went viral, finding so many others who feel the same.
“I know I’m not the only mom who woke up Christmas morning with not a single present under the tree for them as you watched your kids and husband unwrap the presents you spent all month stressing over,” she wrote on top of the video clip.
After receiving tons of supportive comments from other moms who have found themselves with zero presents on Christmas, the mother of two expressed how thankful she was for the support from fellow moms out there.
“I knew I wouldn’t be the only one who could relate to that situation but I was definitely surprised to see how normal it is for so many of us,” she told Bored Panda.
She also shared some deeply personal details on why this particular empty-handed Christmas hit harder due to a hard past couple of years, during which she lost her mom and was hospitalized for COVID-19 that had her on a ventilator. Due to her condition, she also had a miscarriage.
“I was most disappointed because I was on life support last year for nearly 2 months, therefore I missed all of the holidays (Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years). I told my husband for months before Christmas that this year we are going to make up for all the holidays I missed,” she explained.
Despite being on LITERAL LIFE SUPPORT and having a miscarriage, her husband could not muster up the strength to go out to a store or shop online to buy his wife one gift for Christmas. On top of that, Mary still did all she could to make the holidays magical.
“I did all of the Christmas shopping, decorating, and making the magic happen for our kids, all he had to do was get me something to make me feel special,” she said.
“I think moms are and have always been undervalued on a daily basis. So even on Christmas when it’s supposed to be one of the magical times of the year, moms are so easily overlooked and unappreciated,” Mary continued.
Tons of other forgotten moms flooded the comments in solidarity. “Yup. Same. And I’m sitting here stewing in it while preparing a huge meal by myself while everyone else is watching football,” one TikToker wrote.
“We deserve better, Mary responded.
Some people offered advice to Mary, saying that instead of waiting for her husband and kids to step up, she should just go shopping for herself. One mom explained that Mary’s disappointment wasn’t about gifts at all. “For all of those saying to just go buy for yourself, it's not about the actual gift, it's feeling left out and not important enough to be thought of...” she wrote.
One TikToker advised Mary to talk this out with her husband. “Tell him it bothers you. My husband did this one year, and I never let him forget it. He hasn’t done that since,” they wrote.
However, unfortunately for Mary, it seems that this is a perpetual problem in her marriage. “It’s a constant struggle we have every year for the past 7 years for every special occasion,” Mary responded. “You would think I would learn my lesson by now.”
Here’s to Mary renting out a hotel room for herself next Christmas, ordering room service, and enjoying her day however she wants!