A Dad Is Complaining That His Co-Parent Didn’t Send Supplies With The Baby
And a fellow mom has an epic response.
Coparenting is full of challenges, compromises, and considerations. No one, even the most conscientious of uncouplers, will suggest that raising a child across two different households is easy. But I swear, some people are making it even harder than it needs to be by refusing to do literally any of the work. Recently, TikTok creator Chloe (@chloekhloe7) brought up one common pitfall of coparenting: “When you send your child with the other parent, do you send your child with a big-ass bag full of plenty sh*t, or do you just send your child over there?”
She then refers to a post she saw on Facebook in which a father who picked up his child to stay with him for a week and “all my BM [baby mama] sent with him is a pack of wipes, three Pampers, and one set of pajamas. ... ‘Why would you send him to be with me, the dad, with nothing?’”
She gives the camera a long stare.
“I’m sorry, but for me, in my opinion, why are you not prepared for your child? You knew damn well you was finna get your child for a week, yet you had no means to pick up what you think your child would need for that f*cking week? You didn’t think to call your BM and be like ‘Hey, what all is he going to need while he over here so I can go get that’? ... Hello!?”
“And when I say there were so many comments defending this man,” she marvels, continuing, “Men and women. ... I’m sorry, but am I sending my baby with the other parent or am I sending my baby with a babysitter?”
She notes that when she sends her child to his father’s (“every single weekend”), the only thing she sends along with him are “the clothes on his back.” Everything else, naturally, is provided by his dad.
“And then a lot of these dads be mad when they get called ‘deadbeats,’” she adds. “You don’t have sh*t for your kid! That’s very deadbeat behavior. ... You had the means and the time to go get prepared for your child to come be with you, and you still are relying on his mama?
“You’re not watching your niece or your nephew,” she concludes. “You’re not watching one of your friend’s kids. You’re watching your own seed: why do you not have what you need for your own?”
Commenters were here for all of this...
“Hell no. The only thing she takes is a stuffed animal or something like that if she wants it,” wrote one mom.
“If he didn’t have diapers and clothes for this baby, does he have age appropriate food? Where is this baby sleeping?” asks another. “He thinks he’s a babysitter, not a father.”
“I just send my child, the most I’ll send him with is a bookbag with summer work books and the Nintendo switch,” says a third. “Only way I’m packing a bag is if he’s going with his grandparents.”
“The way some of these guys would cry if they were actually held to 50/50,” scoffs another.
To quote yet another commenter: “Lord please help these Daddys understand what it means to be a Daddy!”
And the church said amen. And, honestly, not just for the benefit of the child or the peace of mind of their mothers: for them! Because parenting is hard, but being a parent is a privilege and a gift... if you fully engage in it. If you’re not going to exert parent-level effort then don’t expect a parental experience.
