The Scary Mommy Manifesto


About the writer


In addition to being the founder of all things Scary Mommy, Jill is also the New York Times bestselling author of Simon and Schuster’s Confessions of A Scary Mommy and Motherhood Comes Naturally (And Other Vicious Lies)

From Around the Web


Nicole 7 days ago

I solemnly swear by the Scary Mommy Manifesto….

Barbara Brearley 6 months ago

Moms are human too. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. If not friends or family, hire someone to help with the children, I did. I hired a 13 year old neighbor girl to play with and look after my 3and a half and 22 month old kids while I cared for my newborn. She came after school and during the summer months.

Leanne Turpin Refvik 6 months ago

❤️ this website…it ‘humanizes’ all mothers as the regular people we are! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Carolyn Hosier 6 months ago


Susan Swan Tagg 6 months ago

I need this framed and on a pin I can wear, iPhone case and such!!!

M Elissa D As 6 months ago

The sanctimommies are driving me nuts!!! Those moms who have to tell others that they’re crazy, lazy, disgusting because they do things differently or have a different viewpoint or WORSE they cut down a mom who is saying, “I’m overwhelmed. I need help.” Some mom today wrote that other moms who say they’re too busy to shower are full of crap and just lazy. What causes so much hostility??? If you are a mom who has it allll together, then why don’t you offer helpful and encouraging suggestions to other moms who are struggling instead of sanctimoniously knocking them down?

Meg Drake 6 months ago

I’m framing this

Summer Danehy 6 months ago


Sandra Newman-Walton 6 months ago

Forever and ever amen.

Elsa Kuhr Rock 6 months ago

You ROCK!!! <3 <3

Marsha Motta 6 months ago


Sam Riley 6 months ago

Lol no no just thought we all feel like that sometimes!

Elizabeth Santana 6 months ago

Yes those ladies who take everything to heart like each post should be catered to you personally, get the fuck outta here! Take a joke, we’re all going through the same stuff! I’m happy I found scary mommy, although I’m the scary one in my house :)

Dina Susanne 6 months ago

I would do the same ting.. Atleast the kid stops for a minute! I once made a big bowl of popcorn and placed it on the floor, next to my kids and said “eat!”. I got one hour of silence, and needed to vaccume as payment. Worth it!

Kaitlyn Semmens 6 months ago

People are so quick to judge other people because they’re so insecure with themselves. Screw those people and their opinions.

Marina Cumming 6 months ago

Marching towards the institution right now…awesome day…then a switch flips…and the psycho fournager appears…

Rissa MakingitVintage 6 months ago


Maryann Silverman 6 months ago

Now at the age of 61 I spend my days with my youngest grandkids, brothers ages 2 and 1/2 and 1. I am grateful for my sense of humor and ability to ignore the mess.

Tayla N Joseph Gonzalez 6 months ago


Kristen Werner Schrotberger 6 months ago


Sarah Silver 6 months ago

Motherhood does not just mean taking card of the child but the whole family. Harsh reality sometimes.

Vanessa Hernandez 6 months ago

Haha yup!

Sara Gremlin 6 months ago

I wish you had been around when my son was small. I needed what you do for moms then. Thanks.

Natti Ruales 6 months ago


Mary Panstingel 6 months ago

Wish more people could see the wisdom in these words. I made a joke earlier this week about how I was going crazy chasing my 18-month old from mess to mess, so I finally just made brownies & let him lick the bowl. Had all sorts of smartass remarks about how I was rewarding bad behavior. Ugh.

Gina Leasher 6 months ago

Hallelujah and Amen!!!

Kristy Edwards 6 months ago

I’m more worried about my job causing these at the moment than anything to do with motherhood.

Anna May Torrefranca 6 months ago


Madam Jinx 10 months ago

I’m sorry, bikini clad toddler? Are we really sexualizing babies now? Makes sense. Like cigarettes, hook them when they’re young.

Linda Unwin 10 months ago

This is awesome! If we could all live by this, our children could grow up in a beautiful, non-judgemental world where people support each other and love would be the word of the day!

Baituey 1 year ago

Every where you have to go.You looks like fine, but looks like not fine.Please take a rest.When you are reary fine, I like your magic(^0^)/I like your shorts. Its nice degisn.

Amed 1 year ago

Cyril, cant wait to see u soon in hk .i will attend to your show at Aug 1 2nd row .Really lnkioog forward to see your magic show Good show and Good luck Cyril !!!!

Kmouhot09 1 year ago

I’d add one concession to the ‘I will never offer advice to any mother’ cause my favorite advice to give to new moms is don’t listen to any advice lol you live, you learn, you grow, and you tell people to mind their own damn business unless asked otherwise :)

Siti Maryam 2 years ago

Siti Zarina

Siti Maryam 2 years ago

hahahaha <3

Aerin Landress 2 years ago

You and everyone else! LOL (including me <3)

Eileen Guth-Sulaiman 2 years ago

Thank you :) i can't wait for you to join the band wagon! ;D

Aerin Landress 2 years ago

To my mommy friends. This reminds me of each of you in one way or another ;).

Chrissy 2 years ago

Boobs are good, bottles are good. To a baby…food is good. Forgive that young woman you were…she did her best and that is all one needs to expect. You kept them alive…how do any of us manage it? I often wonder.

Jen 2 years ago

I am so glad I found you! AMEN!

Stacy 2 years ago

I would like to add: “I will never tell a pregnant woman about how scary, painful, or bad birthing my babies were for me. I will never tell her to have a vaginal birth instead of a c-section. I will never tell her how she will forget it. She wont. She will just get over it. But that is for her to learn, not for me to preach.”

Meg 2 years ago

I, too, am guilty of this. And I remember when I was pregnant with my first (and still my only at this point), I told myself I would “never, never, NEVER” dole out unsolicited advice to future expectant moms. Ah well. We’re only human. And good intentioned :)

Meg 2 years ago

Yes. THIS.

Anita @ Losing Austin 2 years ago

Love. And needed the reminder. On days when I question everything I do, but know I’m doing my best while raising two kids, working full time, being a caretaker for my chronically ill husband, continuing the search for my missing brother, writing to share with others…. and failing at most of them daily…. I need to remember that there is no such thing as perfect, and doing the best I can is pretty darn good.


Suzy Soro (@HotComesToDie) 3 years ago

I often wear the same outfits 3-4 days in a row when I go to the store. I used to shower regularly, now I don’t see the point because hello, same clothes 3-4 days in a row.

I don’t have children but apparently I’ve missed my calling.

Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy 3 years ago

Carolyna Pro Black – I’m obsessed with it! :)

HollyB 3 years ago

Yes, yes a thousand times YES!!!

Nicole 3 years ago

I love this sooo sooooooo much. Love.

And I HAVE to know what font was used for the word “Manifesto” and “and other vicious lies” (from the book cover.) PLEASE.

Regina 3 years ago

I love this on so many levels and so many points.


Rachael 3 years ago

I need this on a t-shirt!

Mommie Nessa & the Irish Twins 3 years ago

absolutely awesomely true! this definitely makes me feel better to know sum1 was able to put into words my feelings & actions!

Annie B. 3 years ago

THANK YOU for articulating what we all have felt!

Kristen Mae 3 years ago

If we could all work from the assumption that most everyone else is trying at least as hard as we are… how much more compassion would we have for one another? :)

Kristen Mae 3 years ago

Yes! ~so right…

Teresa (Embracing the Spectrum) 3 years ago

Love it!

Mandy 4 years ago

EVERY mother (and father) should read this!

Wineplz 4 years ago

Great list! I will admit I am baaaad about offering up unsolicited advice because (in my head at least) I’m trying to help, or offer other ideas for the victim to consider. I forget that not everyone wants a ton of info to dig through before making their own decision. That, and I think I do it because I want to share on how successful or deceptively easy it was despite my initial fears. So yeah, heart in the right place, but my mouth usually isn’t. :)
BTW, saw the article on Yahoo (thanks to Melisa with one S) and it’s inspiring me to find a couple hours a week to get back into the swing of blogging again.

Liz @ the six year itch 4 years ago

Love, love, love this!

Angela 4 years ago

Hope you don’t mind me printing this off and hanging it in my house. I’m going to bold the part about not offering up my opinion on the benefits of breastfeeding…etc. I’ve got people around here who don’t understand that I didn’t ask for their opinion.

You will be credited of course:)

Kir 4 years ago

I’m so glad I didn’t miss this Jill. It’s perfect and I laughed and teared up reading it. Parenting is the hardest thing I’ve ever done and it helps me to know that others might feel that way too. Wow, wow!!!!

AlisonCrockett 4 years ago

This is the truest thing ever! If I feel like I have failed one more time because supper incredible mom can figure everything out while I’m just trying to figure out which day I can take a shower, I will explode.

Patrick 4 years ago

Although I am not a scary mommy I may qualify as a sacry Daddy I love the manafesto and am sending it to my daughter who is expecting her 2nd child this month.

Paulette 4 years ago

Amen! I feel like this should be on framed posters throughout the homes of all Mommies. =)

Karen 4 years ago

that was good. :)

NYCSingleMom 4 years ago

Love it – especially they will thrive in spite of me

Jessica Brown 4 years ago

Spot on, perfect, believe it or not, it gave me chill a couple of times. I know, odd, but it’s absolutely, amazingly perfect. Thanks for summing it up so very well, humorously and enjoyably.

And yes, I’m crawling the site. I’m new and I’m loving it, and thought I would let you know, your writing es excellent and I appreciate every word!

Crystal 4 years ago

LOVE this post!

Jen@MamaZen 4 years ago

Lol! Well said :) I particularly like the loud mouthed, bikini clad water pistol shooting toddler….it can happen to anyone ;P

Michelle Saunderson 4 years ago

Well said!

Lori 4 years ago

Is this a petition? Where do I sign?

NotJune 4 years ago

I want to print that manifesto up and hand them out at Babies R Us, lactation classes, supermarkets at 5 p.m. and just crowded areas.

Nery 4 years ago

Great post! I love this point: “I shall hold the new babies belonging to friends and family, so they may shower and nap, which is all any new mother really wants.”

Nery 4 years ago


Dee 4 years ago

Amen!! I am sooo guilty of wearing the same clothes when picking up my kid from school two days in a row!!!

Jacqui 4 years ago

My “babies” are now 15, 19 & 22. But I remember feeling useless at times, and judged. A hearty hear hear!!! to the list above. And may it be read, understood, and implemented by MANY!!

Elisa 4 years ago

Hear, hear!

Lauren @BooPatch 4 years ago

I raise my glass of wine to you SM….better words were never blogged…

Jbird 4 years ago

Amen and Amen.

rachel 4 years ago

I love the line about competition. I am a conscientious objector in the “mommy wars”, but I appreciate your line “The only ones who lose are the ones who race the fastest.”

The Frat Pack + Me 4 years ago

Love this! Stopping over from the blog, Yep, they’re all mine.

Tasha 4 years ago

Ha! Luv it! Glad I took time to read:-).

JJ 4 years ago


Alison@Mama Wants This 4 years ago

Yes, what you said. Thank you for saying it.

Loren Christie 4 years ago

AMEN, sister!

Stacey 4 years ago

Agreed. I want to print this out and post it on my door. “Anyone who enters my home need agree with the following”

Also, can we add a messy clause, don’t judge my home and I won’t judge yours?

Katrina 4 years ago

I would like to print this and hand it out! I put on weight after my third child. A woman I barely know walked up to me one day and asked if I was expecting again and touched my stomach! Not only was I mortified, but I was appalled that a grown woman would ask another woman that. Note to adults…unless you SEE a baby coming out of a woman’s vagina, do not assume she is pregnant. :)

Lisa Johnson 4 years ago


Amory 4 years ago

Stolen (quoted)! So awesome!!!!

Heather 4 years ago

I’m gonna tape the to the fridge. While I reach for the wine.

belinda Colaianni 4 years ago

Know my son has just turned into a teenager there are some other rules:

Answer all questions as truthfully as possible, but don’t go into too much detail

Accept “uh” if ask if they had a good day – they will eventually let you know

Don’t make life a constant battle if they don’t pick up their clothes from off the floor!

Accept a cuddle when you can as soon they won’t want to cuddle at all.

Praise is better than critism – they are sensitive souls

Teenagers can still have trantrums, sulk and maniupulate – no means no!

I’m sure there are lots more ….

Nina 4 years ago

You nailed it babe. Loved this especially: “Motherhood is not a competition. The only ones who lose are the ones who race the fastest.”

Cecilia from ParentingControversy 4 years ago

All good, in theory. Some much easier said than done though. Will give *most* of those a shot.

Rebecca 4 years ago

“I shall not preach the benefits of breastfeeding or circumcision or home schooling or organic food or co-sleeping or crying it out to a fellow mother who has not asked my opinion. It’s none of my damn business.”

This line………is so true. And when asked, I like to add “This is what is best for MY family. What you do will probably be different I’ll just share with you what worked for ME and this kid and what worked for me and that kid”

b harper 4 years ago

words to live by – and i wish more women would!

Johanna 4 years ago

Great Post! Especially the one about the airplane. I’m all about holding babies on airplanes now that I’ve dealt with mini-torture sessions of my own.

Heli 4 years ago

Love it and intend to live by it!!! I want to tattoo it to my forehead!

Liz 4 years ago

You have said all the things I’ve wanted to say to other mothers who have tried to put their noses where they just don’t belong. I printed this out to remind me what not to do! :) Thank you for putting this in writing!

Chantelle 4 years ago

That is my new favorite quote as well! Pure brilliance

Chantelle 4 years ago

Hahaha me too :)

Raquel English 4 years ago


Momma Sunshine 4 years ago


Nydia 4 years ago

In the name of all mothers. Amen.

Mercedes Hayes 4 years ago

Very well put. Cracked me up!

Kim 4 years ago

Love!!!! I think every mother in the world should read this!

Greta Funk 4 years ago

I love this. It’s perfect. And I do solemnly swear to uphold it. Maybe should print it out and tape it to the mirror….

Theresa 4 years ago

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

Amy I. Bloom 4 years ago

You rock, Scary Mommy.

From Belgium 4 years ago

Scary Mommy for president!

Leslie 4 years ago

“Practically perfect in every way.”

Jennifer 4 years ago

Where do I sign this?

Susan 4 years ago

Thanks for the reminders, we all need them. Oh, and they are so true! Now if we can only live by them. :)

Yasmin @ alittlelessfluff 4 years ago

I am printing this out and sticking it on my fridge!
Preach sista!!
Love this post!

Sha 4 years ago


Sharon {Grumpy, Sleepy, and Bashful} 4 years ago

As a mother of three, I agree wholeheartedly with this post. I wish I had written it myself. It is truth. It is simple. It is powerful. Thank you!!

I learned long ago (not before I had kids, I did a lot of judging before I was a mother!) not to judge other mothers. Every kid is different, and every situation is different. Each mother knows her child(ren) better than anyone else. YOU know best, not your mother-in-law, not your neighbor, only you.

So, embrace your power, and go with it, Momma!

Nancy 4 years ago

As a young (and lets be honest, a very unprepared mother) I try my hardest not to pass judgement on other mothers. I have had my fair share of dirty looks and unwarrented advice. I agree with the other readers who said this should come home with your child at the hospital!

Kenna Ray 4 years ago

Preach it, sister! “I would never let my kids do that.” If you say that, it’s almost guaranteed that your kids will, in fact, do that thing. Thanks for the great post!

JINNI 4 years ago

Love this post and would love to link you to my blog everyone needs to read this male and female alike!

Ryan {The Woven Moments} 4 years ago

Please tell me that this will be available in printed form for the holidays. Think of the stocking stuffers!

Kim 4 years ago

Awesome! Every mom needs this!!

Kim 4 years ago

Totally agree!

Kim 4 years ago

AMEN!!!!! This shall be my new mantra!

Susana 4 years ago


Jill 4 years ago

well stated! Thank you!

Jenn 4 years ago


Angie 4 years ago


Jamee @ A New Kind of Normal 4 years ago


Leighann 4 years ago

This is wonderful.
If only every one would follow such great advice

Jen 4 years ago

you have no idea how much I love this.

Kesha 4 years ago

I absolutely love this. It is so TRUE!!!!

Denise 4 years ago

I vote we add not judging or questioning how many (or few) children other mothers have… just found out we are quite unexpectedly and quite (as of now — I’ll get there) unhappily pregnant with #6. After months of bizarre women’s health issues. I can’t wait to hear all the damn comments about this. Ugh.

Ally 4 years ago

Well said. Love it!

Denise 4 years ago

True dat

Jessica 4 years ago

AMEN! I agree with this 100%! Thanks for writing it. I may print it out, I love it so much.

jacqui 4 years ago

The world would be a better place for everyone if all moms memorized this manifesto.

Shea 4 years ago

Love this!

Robin matthews 4 years ago

Amen ! Awesome !

Jess 4 years ago

This post strikes the amen chord for sure. Thanks for sharing everything we try to remind ourselves beneath the snickers and the sneers. xo

deborah l quinn 4 years ago

god love you, woman; this manifesto should be printed out and given to every woman (and ALL her family/friends/co-workers/partners/husbands/lovers/teachers/neighbors/passersby) when she gives birth.

Amber 4 years ago

I love this.

Especially the not competing things. I HATE when mothers try to compete.

mommy23girls 4 years ago

Bravo! And thank you because I am the lady with the kid wanting to run around the plane, then crying when turbulance hits and she needs to be in her seat. Oh yeah, good times!!!!

Not Winning Mom of the Year 4 years ago


shafeena 4 years ago

that is BEAUTIFUL !! crediting that in my blog !!

The Flying Chalupa 4 years ago

That woman wearing the same yoga pants was totally me. I don’t even know if there was a good reason but thank you for understanding. Also, when can I expect you over to watch the Chalupa while I nap?

Another fabulous – and accurate – post.

Rubyroses 4 years ago

Love it!!! and I shall…

Kelsey 4 years ago

What a wonderful set of rules! I think the best one is the one about not sharing your opinion unless asked for…it seems like everyone has a philosophy on everything and sometimes it can be very uncomfortable when they don’t accept other opinions.

MamaRobinJ 4 years ago

Cross my heart and hope to die, stick a needle in my eye.

Well said.

Keisha-Cupcake Wishes & Birthday Dreams 4 years ago


Jenn 4 years ago

Hallelujah sister!

Marie-Louise 4 years ago

I take the pledge. I agree with not giving out unsolicited advice, although I used to do it too, I have to admit. Got much better at shutting up though. This list is great for grandmothers and mothers-in-law too, I feel :-)

Nicole 4 years ago

Perfect! Simply Perfect

Nancy 4 years ago

How About I shall never assume the woman with the child is “Grandma”

Aimee @ Ain’t Yo Mama’s Blog 4 years ago

I’ll pledge to this. Love it!

Morgan Marshall 4 years ago

Bravo! In my experience, it’s fellow mothers who tend to judge the most harshly. I figure it has to do with their own feelings of inadequacy. Moms that don’t judge are the ones that know better than to expect perfection… not from other moms, themselves, out their own kids. And those are the best moms of all.

Jo 4 years ago

Oh. I SO SOLEMNLY SWEARED THIS. Swore too. Yep. *nods*

Jo 4 years ago

Where is the bloggy badge? I must have a bloggy badge for this. MUST. Please? And a t-shirt. Need a t-shirt. And one of those bracelet thingys.

Ok…at least the bloggy badge. :)

Theresa 4 years ago

This should mandatory reading!!!!

Erin Margolin 4 years ago

I just tweeted this and it’s going on my FB page, too.

i love you. #thatisall.

Candace 4 years ago

Absolutely LOVE THIS!!

Marinka 4 years ago

Amen. And yes, it only looks like I wear the same damn thing every day.

SaucyB 4 years ago

yup, i’d sign that. I’ve said many times, some moms can’t feel like they’re getting it right unless that means someone else is getting it wrong.

Sarah 4 years ago

I’m going to put this on my fridge.

janine 4 years ago

Thank you for making me feel “normal”; whatever that is. Now if my two teenagers would just stop telling me how ” none of their friends’ moms do this or that and they ALWAYS have real dinners, and blah, blah, blah, etc.”
Thank you, thank you, thank you . . . AMEN :)

Mon 4 years ago

I will add
I should not assume a mother of a single kid has it easier, remember there is no sibling to entertain an only child.

Brittany {Mommy Words} 4 years ago

Preach it! The world of motherhood would be so much better if we all just followed these! Awesome.

Lisa 4 years ago

So, how do we get every mother on earth to sign this?!

erica 4 years ago

This is fantastic and definitely a manifesto to live by and share.

Ildiko 4 years ago

I totally agree, and virtually signed :-)

Julie 4 years ago

I’ll ditto the Amens!!

Jessica 4 years ago

I do solemnly swear.

Cindy 4 years ago


Jessica 4 years ago


Diya Sen 4 years ago

Hey! When did you enter my brain and read my thoughts?! Seriously, I have been telling myself most of these things all through my mommahood!! Can’t say I practice them, though, but I can fel myself become mellow as realisation slowly dons on me! Now I try to restrain myself more often, no point in being judgemental, or in entering the mom competition, what’s the use of taking on extra stress, as it is I just somehow manage to hold body and soul together!!

Bridget 4 years ago

Thank you Jesus…I mean Jill, thank you Jill. This is perfection.

Christi 4 years ago

These are great! But, I think I’m the mom wearing the same yoga pants, flip flops and tshirt two days in a row to school pickup. But no, I don’t really have a good reason. :-)

LC 4 years ago

This is fabulous! Thank you!

Michelle 4 years ago

This is awesome and so true. It would be nice if all mothers could agree to this…love it!!

Life with Kaishon 4 years ago

Absolutely perfect : )

Jeannette 4 years ago

Best advice I ever got while expecting: “You’re going to get TONS of advice, it’s all well intentioned. Take what you like leave the rest, you’re the MOM YOU know best!”

C @ Kid Things 4 years ago

I wear the same clothes, um, quite often and I have no good reason. Except they’re comfy. Wait, that’s a good reason, right?

Stephanie 4 years ago

Well put. All of it.
I hereby pledge to uphold these manifestos and do my part to make this post viral.

emilia 4 years ago

U r so right!! Love it!!!

Tanya @ NecessaryPleasures Blog 4 years ago

Yes, yes, yes, yes, YES!

Just Jennifer 4 years ago

This is an amazing manifesto!

My favorites: body image, helping new moms, having compassion for other parents.

Will be sharing and sharing!

Leisl 4 years ago

Omigosh! What crap experiences On top of dealing with depression. You Poor thing. Congrats for making it as a fab mOmmy in sPite of it all!

Its Fitting 4 years ago

Love it. It’s hard not to judge or feel judged sometimes, but as long as we all make an effort to be nice and just SURVIVE together… we can DO IT! :-) With a few bottles of wine.

Andrea 4 years ago

And obviously my iPad would like me to forget, not for BETter … Oops.

Andrea 4 years ago

Preach it, Sister. We are all in this together. Like it or not, forgetter or worse … Mothers.

Crazy Ladyx5 4 years ago

LOVE IT!! (but I did make my own baby food for the 4 kids, it was cheaper, and healthier, but mostly cheaper 😉

Lisa 4 years ago

Sending you a hug in solidarity!

Lisa 4 years ago

I shall repeat these virtues daily. Thank you, SM!!!

Life As Wife 4 years ago

I’m printing this out and giving a copy to all of my judgmental, opinionated cousins.

Lollie 4 years ago

With my right hand placed on the good book of motherhood (pick whichever parent guiding du jour you prefer) I do solemnly swear to upload tenants of the Scary Mommy Manifesto!

pgoodness 4 years ago

I’d like to add
– I shall learn to choose my battles. For example: Is a cookie really worse than a pop tart when devoured with a glass of milk? Accordingly, I shall accept other mothers battles without judgment.

This is awesome.

Karen (KelleysMom) 4 years ago

Totally guilty of the yoga pants one. And a few of the others, like the candy aisle, etc.

Thank you for not judging me.

Krissy 4 years ago

I think this should come out along with the placenta and that how to raise a perfect happy child manuel we’re supposed to get at delivery!

Jean Swent 4 years ago

Awesome and agreed!!!!

joanne 4 years ago

I completely agree – something we all need to remind ourselves of every day. At least once. Repeat as necessary! You do the best you can with what you have and as long as you are doing it with the best intentions – nothing else matters.

oh.em.gee 4 years ago


Nicole 4 years ago

That line is perfect!

Nicole 4 years ago

Totally agree!!

mama marchand 4 years ago

Love love love this. Preach it, sister!

amy 4 years ago

Thank you and love the one about candy aisle and m&m’s cuz it really works:-)

Michelle 4 years ago

I don’t know who Paulo Coelho is… but that’s damn brilliance right there.

OneHonestMom 4 years ago

Perfection. Full Stop. Now posted on my fridge, although I have long adhered to these principles myself.

My fave quote is along these lines:
“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It’s one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it’s another to think that yours is the only path.”
~ Paulo Coelho (August 24, 1947 – )

Tori 4 years ago

Just Awesome :)

Michelle 4 years ago


I’ve been struggling of late, with a number of self-doubt issues, stemming from some behavioral crap going on with Son. A lot of “What Did I Dos” have issued forth from my mouth.

Thank you for reminding me that we are not perfect, and that no one, least of all our kids, expects perfection from us. Perhaps we can some day let that ideal go.

Much love.

Michelle 4 years ago

I’ll third this. It also needs to go home with each newborn in a pamphlet.

Michelle 4 years ago

Congratulations! May you have a happy, healthy, wonderful pregnancy and delivery.

Nicole @MTDLBlog 4 years ago

Fabulous! Well said. :-)

Dee 4 years ago

Amen sister

Cristina 4 years ago

Love it!

Missy 4 years ago

Love this Jill!
I love how you are always keeping it real. Being in the “mommy club” should be about support and understanding each other. Not judgement and trying to be SuperMom.

kristi 4 years ago

Realizing that I don’t need to like anything specific, just love this as a whole. Ok, maybe I like the M&Ms to the toddler part the best.

Nicole 4 years ago

Love this! Especially about the candy at the grocery store! Gotta do what you gotta do :)

maddie 4 years ago

I take the pledge.

kristina 4 years ago

I agree. At every PTA meeting place and church nursery also:)

Tanya 4 years ago



sweet_archangel 4 years ago

“• I shall not preach the benefits of breastfeeding or circumcision or home schooling or organic food or co-sleeping or crying it out to a fellow mother who has not asked my opinion. It’s none of my damn business.”

This. Too many people inforce their opinions on others and they shouldn’t.

This whole list is something that EVERY mother should live by. Thanks so much for this ^_^

Jen 4 years ago


venomrose 4 years ago


Sarah 4 years ago

Yes! Please plaster this in every school and on every playground. Nicely said and a great reminder for us all!

Mel 4 years ago

Oh, I am so in love with this list. Absolutely every line is valuable. LOVE ESPECIALLY: “Motherhood is not a competition. The only one who loses is the one who races the fastest.”

Nikki 4 years ago

I’ll drink to that, cheers!

Rachel 4 years ago

I agree!

Rachel 4 years ago

Love. This must go home with every new mom!

Deb 4 years ago

You need a book. And a talk show. And a feature film. You are my favorite voice on motherhood, EVER.

ChiMomWriter 4 years ago

I love this. We could all use a little more peace and a little less squabbling!

Tracey 4 years ago

Awesome- I love it! I need to print this and put it on my fridge.

Shell 4 years ago

I’m not usually one to ever say “all moms should…” but I’ll say it here. All moms should live by this!

Melissa 4 years ago

Love! LOVE! Can not wait to hear you speak at BlogHer!

Tammy @ Skinny Mom’s Kitchen 4 years ago

OMG this is AWESOME!!! I hope to god it goes viral because SOOOOOO many women need to see this and follow it religiously.

tracey – justanothermommy 4 years ago

In fact, let’s apply these rules to EVERYONE we meet; mothers, fathers and childless. Why the judgment? Why do we judge others? Why do we even CARE?!?

Alyssa 4 years ago

Well put! Great post.

Stephanie 4 years ago

You. Are. Genius.

Jeanine 4 years ago

Where were you when my kids were babies? I was the most insecure person on earth. I clearly remember a woman behind me at the grocery store asking why I was buying formula. How could I?! A couple of weeks later another woman asked me why I was using a bottle. I did not know either of these people.Complete strangers. I promptly fell into a deep dark post-partum depression. That was the first child. I could not breast feed after #2 was born because I needed antidepressants pronto. The nurse yelled outside my door, “Room 16 is the only one not breast feeding!” They sent a counselor in to talk to me. Fortunately, I was ready for her. She left my room quickly. My children are 10 & 13 now. These incidents were a long time ago, but still sting. Stop judging. You do not know a person’t story.

Sara 4 years ago

Very well put, absolutely perfect!!!

kerri_bugg 4 years ago

Hear, hear! This should be printed, lamenated, and framed in every maternity hospital room and baby’s nursery in America!

Jess 4 years ago

Perfection! I hereby swear to uphold each and every one.

dysfunctional mom 4 years ago

This is perfection! I need to send this to my niece, who is newly pregnant with her first baby.

Kimberly 4 years ago

Love everything about this. Especially the part about motherhood not being a competition. And the part about not passing body-image issues down to my own kids. I needed this today, and I’m thankful you posted it.

Kimberly 4 years ago

Congratulations! What amazing news. I’m thrilled for you. Two is so much more than twice the fun!

Candice Kiser 4 years ago

Love that, very true and honest, I can relate to almost every one of them. Love it. :)

Alexis@TroublesomeTots 4 years ago


Practical Parenting 4 years ago

Love this! Hope people hold onto the truth within the humor. Great post.

LoveFeast Table 4 years ago

Amen. Well said.

Victoria KP 4 years ago

Love this! Amen!

Catherine 4 years ago

On a day when I just found out that I expecting my second child, and couldn’t be happier or more scared, this is just perfect. Just do the best you can do, and let other Mom’s do the same. Thanks for this!

nic @mybottlesup 4 years ago

in her holy name, amen.