Relationships are hard — especially when you’ve been together for a long time. Chances are, if you’re in a relationship that’s lasted longer than a few months, you’ve had a few spats.
Couples fight about any and everything. A glass on the counter can be the gateway to the biggest yelling match of your life. All-star showdowns can develop out of arguments about which direction the toilet paper should face. And yes, it does matter which of you is to blame for forgetting to fold the towels.
Fighting doesn’t mean you care for each other any less. If anything, you can see those disagreements as proof you love your partner so much that you don’t want them to move through life being wrong.
Here are some of the things that have caused relationship battles. Some are hilarious, others will give you that relatable “OMG, we’ve had that fight too” feeling. Others are downright weird. But watch out: things can get pretty ugly.
“We ALWAYS argue about moving furniture around in the house. My brain is totally visual, so I can just look at the room in my head and switch things around, and I am uncanny at being able to judge sizes — I always know if something will fit or not. (I’ve literally gotten it down to the centimeter before.) My husband cannot, and he can’t wrap his head around the fact that I can. He will measure every item and space and plot it out in google sketch-up, so he can then drag stuff around and see ‘what will work.’ I’m like I ALREADY DID THIS IN MY BRAIN THIS IS A WASTE OF TIME!” — Nikki
2. Bed Sheets
“Whether the pattern on the top sheet faces out or in. The first time we tried to make the bed together the sheet kept getting twisted.” — Lisa
For what it’s worth, I’d just be thrilled if my husband remember to change the sheets every few weeks.
“Colors. Seriously. He’s a painter. Do not bring up mauve or taupe. It can get ugly.” — Nancy
“Whether mustard is a spice or a condiment.” — Jackie
For what it’s worth, it’s both.
“We fight about whether leftover food on a plate should be scraped into the sink or trash. It gets UGLY.” — Sarah
6. How to recycle
“My husband and I had one of our biggest fights when we first got married over how best to wash a tin can for the recycling bin. 25 years later we still crack up over that one.” — Kathy
7. How to load the dishwasher
“Loading the goddamn dishwasher. He’s crap at it, and the dishwasher is old, so if you don’t load it properly, stuff doesn’t get clean. It’s surprising he’s so bad, because he can load a station wagon or arrange furniture like it’s Tetris. His spatial sense fails him at the dishwasher.” — Erin
I mean, if you haven’t argued about how to load the dishwasher, are you even a couple?
“Why in God’s good name are there FIVE open peanut butters in the fridge??? Why are they even in the fridge in the first place? So much peanut butter.” — Aileen
“We argue over cooking pretty consistently. He believes it’s best to err on the side of overcooking, and he does. I, however, believe in following actual directions, including recipes.” — Kelly
10. Milk (Yes, milk)
“Early in our 21-year marriage, we got into a huge fight over 1% vs 2% milk. 2% was the hill I was evidently willing to die on, because when he brought home 1% shortly after we’d discussed it, I lost it and went into a rage. We still don’t have 1% in the house.” — Kelly
Whatever you do, just don’t drink straight from the carton.
11. Board games.
“Worst fight in ten years together was over Scrabble. He tore the paperback dictionary in half, which is super out of character for my nonviolent, book-loving husband. I can’t even remember what word it was now, but we don’t play that game anymore.” — Kelsey
12. Writing utensils
“The ex and I had a huge fight about the proper care and use of a white eraser. I took the paper wrapper off of it. He said it had to be left on so that the oils from hands didn’t ruin it too fast.” — Amanda
OK, so even we can’t figure out this one.
“Our biggest fight has been over the appropriate quantity of Christmas wrapping paper. I told him we needed to buy more rolls. He did not believe me. When you’re wrapping a Little Tikes Cozy Coupe, you need some serious square footage! He eventually admitted I was right.” — Nicole
(Side note: Never doubt a mom on a holiday gift wrapping mission.)
14. Where to live
“One time my husband and I had a multiple day heated “discussion” about whether or not we would be able to permanently live in a tree house. (Correct answer: no, we could not.)” — Julie
Yes, Julie. That is the correct answer.
15. Where to put the dish scrubber
“We have been fighting about where to put the dish scrubber for years (he wants it on the windowsill, I want it underneath the sink in a cabinet).” — Pam
That thing is gross, so this is an important convo.
16. Classic literature
“Whether there really was someone called William Shakespeare who wrote plays. Me: yes, obviously, duh. Him: *conspiracy theories* This argument lasted the 16 years of our marriage.” — Ebba
Psh. Of course, Shakespeare was real… Or was he?
17. Trees vs. Forks
“Whether or not there are more trees or forks in the world. We will legit yell at each other.” — Julie
Hmm. That’s a hard one, y’all. #TeamTree
“OMG, where to go during the zombie apocalypse. Seriously.” — Lauren
That’s easy. Far, far away.
19. The kids
“CHILD CARE.” — Katy