James Van Der Beek Is All Of Us Dying Laughing At A Swearing Toddler

by Valerie Williams

James Van Der Beek and his wife Kimberly can’t stop laughing at their f-bomb spouting toddler and they’re not alone

Try as we might, it can be incredibly hard to keep our language clean when the kids are around. Life happens and that means f-bombs do too, and why is it that little kids can ignore 97 percent of what we say to them but hone in on the accidental fucks, shits, damn-its, and bitches like moths to a flame? It’s a parenting conundrum for the ages and one we’ve yet to solve, but as long as it’s happening, we might as well laugh like James Van Der Beek and his wife Kimberly.

The Van Der Beeks are parents to a whole bunch of adorable little blondies and it looks like they’re the same as us regular folk — as in, they also let the fucks fly in the presence of their kids. Watch below as their toddler daughter Gwendolyn drops a number of them as the entire family giggles. And watch James and Kimberly shaking their heads and laughing hysterically, because I’m sorry, that shit is always funny.

The two parents watch their cherubic daughter swearing like a sailor and just kinda throw their hands up, because what the fuck can you do? Tell them to stop and they’ll just keep saying it. “Where did she hear that?” Kimberly says while laughing. Who knows? You can’t really punish them because they’re too young to understand and it’s so frigging funny, why would you want to? Just roll with it.

“Please please please tell me it’s not too late to submit for ‘Parents of the Year,'” Van Der Beek captioned the hilarious vid. No my friend, it’s not. That contest is open on a rolling basis and submissions of this quality are literally always welcome. I will happily pass you my crown.

After months in quarantine with (understandably) frustrated and stir-crazy parents, there’s probably lots of small kids gaining a, um, colorful new vocabulary. I venture that a lot of us have decided that a swearing toddler is really the least of our worries as news of continued unemployment, evictions, and rapidly rising COVID-19 cases, hospitalizations, and deaths inundates us daily.

We were generally pretty solid about not swearing in front of our small children, mostly out of fear that they’d repeat those words at daycare and embarrass the shit out of us. However, there was one summer weekend at my parents’ cabin — my two single, child-free brothers came to visit. After a few days of hearing her uncles saying “fuck” every other sentence, our then four-year-old couldn’t stop. Around the third time she chirped, “where the fuck is Daddy?” I gave up trying to discipline her. It was way too hilarious and I had to laugh so I wouldn’t cry. Thankfully, after ignoring it for a day or two, she didn’t say it again. Well, until maybe middle school.

Hopefully, the Van Der Beeks have that same luck — or not. Anything goes in this godforsaken year and if a swearing toddler makes you laugh, by all means, let it happen.