Kim finally admits to wanting more out of her life and her partner
Keeping Up With the Kardashians is finally coming to an end after 14 years and 20 seasons. Last night, the final episode of the show aired, and it gave fans a deeper understanding of why Kim and Kanye’s marriage ended.
“I never thought I was lonely,” Kim said in a sit down with mom, Kris Jenner. “But, turning 40 this year, I was like, ‘No, I don’t want a husband that lives in a completely different state.’” In previous shows this season, Kim admitted filing for divorce made her feel like a “failure” and a “loser,” but last night’s show made it clear just how long she’d been unhappy.
Kim admitted to going to therapy to “work on herself,” something in previous seasons she’d been against. “I feel like I’ve worked so hard in life to achieve everything that I’ve wanted to, and I’ve lived up to my expectations and achieved ten times more than I even thought was humanly possible,” she said. “But I don’t have a life to share that with.”
She continued: “I mean, I have my kids, but am I just gonna sit here and think, OK, my kids fulfill me and I’m good? I never thought I was lonely. I thought I could just have my kids and my husband moves state to state and I’m on this ride with him and I was OK with that.”
Despite their divorce, Kim continues to show her love for her ex, recently sharing a throwback pic on Instagram in honor of Kanye’s birthday.
Kim admitted living apart was perhaps more than because of work commitments and something her ex-husband requested. “I used to think that [living apart] was when we were getting along the best, but to me that’s sad and that’s not what I want,” she explained. “I want someone where we have the same [TV] shows in common. I want someone that wants to work out with me.”
She also said during quarantine, she would work out with Khloé and Tristan. “I was third-wheeling it for a good eight months in quarantine, and I was so envious of that,” she said. “It’s the little things that I don’t have,” she added. “I have all the big things. I have [everything] extravagant you could possibly imagine. And no one will ever do it like that. I’m grateful for those experiences, but I think I’m ready for the smaller experiences that I think will mean a lot.”
Jenner cried, telling her daughter she just wants her to be happy because it’s been awhile since she’s seen her feel good. Kim admitted she feels “numb” and “tired” of having “emotional breakdowns,” but that she’s not giving up without a fight. “I didn’t come this far to come this far and not be happy,” she said.
Here’s hoping post-divorce and the show ending she will be able to find it — for herself and her kids.