A TikTok mom and content creator is going after the frustrating reality of “typical” gender roles in the home and how men expect gold stars and endless praise for doing one task that women typically do every single day for all of eternity. And the end result is both hilarious and too real.
Clare Brown (@clarabellecwb) calls out men who use weaponized incompetence to get out of taking care of household duties and if they do help, expecting us to bow at their feet with gratitude. In a recent video, Brown turns the tables on what it’d be like if the men of the house were talked to the way most women are.
In the clip, Brown starts off by insisting that her husband take a rest after working “so hard” on dinner.
“Yeah, you rest. I got this,” she says, impersonating a well-intentioned by condescending man.
Then, things go how they typically go when a partner in the house finally decides to help out after, well, never helping.
“When I opened the dishwasher, there were dishes in there. Do I gotta put those away?” she asks.
Then, providing a perfect example of weaponized incompetence, Brown’s character decides to just leave those clean dishes on the counter for her partner to put away. He’s better at doing that anyway.
Weaponized incompetence is when an individual pretends not to be able to complete a task or simple action so someone else will complete it for them.
“The reason it is weaponized is because the partner places the responsibility back onto the other partner to complete the tasks, and it is intended for them to complete for future occasions,” psychotherapist and certified couples' therapist Lee Phillips, Ed.D., LCSW, CST, told mbg.
Brown’s clip continues on with her character repeatedly calling attention to the fact that they’re “doing the dishes” as if to call for recognition and praise.
“I'm doing the dishes. It's exhausting, so,” she says.
Then Brown’s character hops on the phone with their dad to alert them that they’re *gasp* doing the dishes like such a good wife.
“Hey dad, guess what? I'm about to do the dishes. Yeah, just like you. Yeah, Trent’s lying down, so it falls on me to do the dishes.”
After completing the dishes, Brown’s character announces the dishes are done.
“Hey, I did the dishes for you. You want to go down and look?” she asks.
After the video went viral, Brown’s comment section was filled with women thanking her for flipping the script on weaponized incompetence and shedding light on just how unbalanced household duties are in the home.
“This is so refreshing to see!! Modern wives do so much,” one user wrote.
Another wrote, “My dad told my mom ‘I washed YOUR floor’…. I think my mom fell over laughing.”
Another joked sarcastically, “Some other husbands aren’t so lucky to have a wife willing to help out! 👏”
One more user echoed the satire of the clip and said, “Omg! I hope he appreciates you being so on board with splitting chores 50/50 like that”
“Trent is so lucky to have you even tho he’ll probably have to re wash them it’s the thought that counts 👏🏽😌,” another wrote.